Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Just writing....

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Just writing....

    Hello All,
    I'm writing simply because there is so much going on in both my SO(Kalen)'s life and mine. I can't say that much of it is good but we are getting through it. I just want to share to get everything off of my mind. So I'm going to start with Kalen's world first. Not too long ago, his families' car was stolen, they haven't been able to locate it and it wasn't paid off so they can't get a new car. He was in school this semester but was forced to drop out because one he started late because of financial aid issues and two, he was having to ride 10 miles everyday to school and back on a bike. All of this combined was too much for him to handle, along with his family having financial issues. His father, runs his own business and their money isn't steady from month to month. And this month, no one paid the internet bill so we can only talk on the family phone (which is prepaid, so we can't talk long). As for me, My family is having financial issues as well. My uncle just moved in with my mom and 2 brothers because him and his wife are now separated. Problem is, he doesn't give my mom money for rent and food like he is suppose to, we can't really kick him out because he's family and has nowhere else to go. My mom doesn't work and lives off of child support and food stamps because my youngest brother has Down Syndrome and is sick too often for her to work. Because of this, she is really struggling to feed everyone since there is a new grown male in the house she has to feed as well. I am living off of my financial aid, since I am in College. I send them money when my mom needs help. I won't get into the other problems because they are more personal.
    With all of this going on, Kalen and I have realized, we won't have kids until we know that we are financially stable. We don't want to have to deal with all of the same problems when we have our family. Meanwhile, we are trying to move in together sometime within the next year but aren't quite sure how to make it happen with all the money problems. I may be able to ask my landlord about him moving in because I found out in my lease it says the house can have 5 occupants and currently there are 4 so I'm assuming that means one of us can have a roommate. I just don't want to rush things, he wants to move in by January, I told him we should wait until next school year (July/August) because I want both of us to have our licenses (which neither of us currently have) and at least one car so we don't have to rely on public transit and we can go visit our families whenever we want to. He doesn't have a problem with waiting, he just really wants to make it happen ASAP, which I can understand. We've been a couple almost 2 years, known each other for 3 and haven't visited since a year ago.
    Anyways, I think I've rambled on enough. If anyone has read this all the way through and would like to give me some advice/suggestions please let me know. Oh and just FYI, he is 19 (will be 20 in April) and I am 20 (will be 21 in March). Thanks for listening everyone!
    ~Samantha

    #2
    Wow that sucks! Isn't there anyway that your uncle can get a job and maybe at least chip in for groceries and a little bit of rent? I just think that's slack especially since your mom seems to be a single mom with a disabled child who she needs to take care of, as well as your other sibling.

    But anyway, I think you and your SO should focus on having enough money to make the move. Money unfortunately is always a problem these days, and with things like moving, you just want to be on the safe side so that neither of you gets stuck in a rut. It would be good for your SO to look for possible job prospects prior to moving over to you, so that while he still hasn't got work when he's with you, he doesn't eat into all of his savings.

    I'm just going by what my SO and I are doing also, because he's planning to move over here to me next year, except we're on different continents! But yes, just make sure you and him have enough stored away for a rainy day. Good luck!

    Comment


      #3
      Wow...I'm so sorry you guys are going through all of that. I was also wondering why your Uncle can't contribute to the rent like he should. Is he unemployed and looking or just skimping on the rent. Also just because they are family doesn't mean you can't kick them out. Sometimes that swift kick is what helps them get their crap together.

      As for you and your SO. Take your time to save up, as much as it seems like a good idea to rush to be together i can tell you its not the best course of action. I think if me and my SO had waited (originally he was supposed to move here next year, it got moved up to October then finally August) everything would have worked out better for us. When the time finally comes, see if he can apply for jobs before the big move so when he gets there he already had a game plan. Licenses are definitely a good idea! My final thought is just take your time, be prepared in every way you can be. Good Luck! =)
      "You want for myself
      You get me like no one else
      I am beautiful with you

      I am beautiful with you
      Even in the darkest part of me
      I am beautiful with you
      Make it feel the way it's supposed to be
      You're here with me
      Just show me this and I'll believe
      I am beautiful with you"

      -Halestorm

      Comment


        #4
        I agree with Zapookie. He should look for prospective jobs in your area before he moves. I also think it's very kind of you to help your mom out considering it's not something you HAVE to do and some people wouldn't

        Comment


          #5
          Dang that really sucks on both ends :/ I guess the best advice i can give is just don't give up.... With hardship comes ease, and patience is the key... Keep your head up!
          Be surcharged with peace and joy, And scatter them wherever you are And wherever you go. Be a blazing fire of truth, Be a beauteous blossom of love And be a soothing balm of peace...sigpic

          Comment


            #6
            For those of you wondering about my uncle, he has a job, but he also has an addiction that he uses all of his money on. Not a good one either. So most of the time he's giving my mom like $20 at a time, while that helps, it doesn't cover him living there. We've all told him to quit, it seriously takes up all his time and money but he doesn't feel the need to (this is the reason his wife doesn't want him around anymore). My SO will be looking for a job as soon as he gets a license, but at the moment he can't do that because his parents don't have a car to get him to the DMV and they don't have the money to pay for it. And I know that kicking my uncle out is an option but I'm from the country and our family is very close, too close at times. And he has too many problems to just be kicked out and not have a place to go. Everything just kind of goes in a circle, with no ending point, no break to give us the chance to make things better. But I swear that none of this will break Kalen and I apart. We've been through bad times before and made it through just fine, this is just one of those bad times where it's really bad. Thank you everyone for your encouragement

            Comment

            Working...
            X