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Can "I Love You" Lose Its Meaning?

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    Can "I Love You" Lose Its Meaning?

    Do you feel "I love you" can lose its meaning? Why or why not?

    Personally, I've never understood the viewpoint that it can be oversaid. :/ Primarily because I don't believe "I love you" is so much about the three words as it is about the intention behind them. I mean sure, there may come a point you don't feel as flooded with flutterbies as you once did, and it may not feel like the very first day it was said every single time, but if it's said with meaning behind it, should that matter? For me, saying "I love you" is about reminding that person that I'm there and that I love them immensely. It's not out of habit and it's not to have it reciprocated (I like hearing "I love you too" as much as the next person, but sometimes it's nice simply to say and remind them of it without any expectation), but rather it's out of what I'm feeling, and some days I feel differently than others. Some days I may feel particularly affectionate and young and in love and other days I may feel a bit more happy, content, and comfortable, but for me or for my partner, it's never lost its meaning.

    So... discuss?

    P.S. Yes this was inspired by another thread, but I only thought to post something because this point has come up on another forum I'm on too, so I'm curious as to what you think. :P
    { Our Story on LFAD }


    Our Beginning
    Met online: February 2009
    Feelings confessed: December 2010
    Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
    Officially together since: 08 April 2011

    Our Story
    First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
    Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
    Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
    Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013

    Our Happily Ever After
    to be continued...

    #2
    I think it can, which is why it should only be said when the speaker is expressing an emotion they are powerfully feeling at that moment, not simply to fill a pause or because it's a particular time of day.

    Comment


      #3
      depends... just randomly in the day, its really sweet and if it isnt constant, it can make you go auwwww!

      stuff like saying i love you just before bed, or just before you part ways for abit (like shopping... we usually split because he loves clothes n i love gadgets!)... it doesn't have much of a meaning, but you would realise its gone when its gone

      thats one viewpoint anyway x

      Comment


        #4
        With my Ex I remember we had trouble with that. "I love you" lost its meaning. I think the reason it lost its meaning because it became so routine and automatic. I don't know how else to say it but when it loses meaning and becomes part of the routine, you know. We were growing apart and falling out of love. I think there's a lot to say about the intent behind it. When my ex and I started feeling like it was too routine, the intent was often just because its what other couples did, or because it was expected at the end of the phone call.

        With my SO we haven't had that problem at all. We've been together almost 2 and a half years, and it hasn't lost its effect. In fact there's still butterflies sometimes. When he says it with my name I still get shivers. When he says it out of the blue I get all smiley. Sometimes I even wonder HOW I felt that way with my ex. If that makes sense. My SO and I have gotten really good at saying it in different ways depending on our mood though. "Love you" is usually when one of us is upset and even though we're mad we can't stand to leave without the other knowing its still there. "I love you" or "I love you (insert name here)" is when we're feeling strongly romantic. "i love you" (yes the capital I makes a difference) is more of an every day romance tone...while "wuv you" is to fill the silences, be cute, or be silly. Even the nicknames we use after the love yous will help in setting the mood.

        Boy thats complicated....>.<

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by DollOnAMusicBox View Post
          With my SO we haven't had that problem at all. We've been together almost 2 and a half years, and it hasn't lost its effect. In fact there's still butterflies sometimes. When he says it with my name I still get shivers. When he says it out of the blue I get all smiley. Sometimes I even wonder HOW I felt that way with my ex. If that makes sense. My SO and I have gotten really good at saying it in different ways depending on our mood though. "Love you" is usually when one of us is upset and even though we're mad we can't stand to leave without the other knowing its still there. "I love you" or "I love you (insert name here)" is when we're feeling strongly romantic. "i love you" (yes the capital I makes a difference) is more of an every day romance tone...while "wuv you" is to fill the silences, be cute, or be silly. Even the nicknames we use after the love yous will help in setting the mood.

          Boy thats complicated....>.<
          haha... we have the same thing, you arent on your own!
          "luv ya" is when we are reeeaaally mad and someone has to apologise PRONTO :P
          "love you" is jst slightly peeved... can be resolved
          "love u" eh... still love but jst not with it
          "wuv u" NOSTALGIA lol

          and then the "i love you" is just for day to day use... like jst saying goodbye for abit or something (although sometimes shortened to "love you" if busy)
          and then "i love you so so so much" is meaningful... very meaningful...

          Comment


            #6
            I personally feel "I love you" loses its meaning when it's overly said. These are 3 words you say to someone special so it should be said it it's meant, not tO fill a pause. Sometimes people say it so automatically that it almost became 2nd nature.

            With my ex w've always tell each other "I love you" but in reality there were no actions backing up words. We were always fighting over little things that in the end doesn't matter. but because we're together it almost feels like we should tell each other "I love you".

            With my current relationship I still haven't told him bf "I love you". One of the main reason is I don't think I love him yet. I'm very fond of him and enjoys his company and am happy being with him. But "love" is such a strong word that I don't want to use it so lightly (he feels the same way). I think we'll both say it when we know we really Mean it.

            Comment


              #7
              I don't think it has for us, we been together for over 2 years, and yeah we say it a lot, but its letting each other know we still are in that place where we want/need/care/adore/crazy about you feelings. I love him telling me he loves me, just in the mist of our day or conversation or when were not talking, getting that i love you's from him. I love it, makes me feel he's still in the same place i am. I personally dont see how it can lose its meaning
              I love you Nathan <3
              sigpic
              5/25/09 <3

              Comment


                #8
                My theory is that it's related to the 5 languages of love, so it depends on the individuals in the relationship I thrive on quality time and words of affirmation, so hearing and saying "I love you" is important to me. I never get tired of it. I'd hate to think that something happened to one of us and I didn't tell my boyfriend I loved him that day.

                I'd say my boyfriend expresses love through physical touch more than words. When we're long distance this tends to translate to blowing kisses over skype. I'd much rather get an "I love you," but I know they mean the same thing to him, so we tend to have a mix of both throughout the day

                Comment


                  #9
                  I'm not sure. I come from a family where 'i love you' is not something that is said very often. In his family, it is the same situation. So when we got to a certain point, and I knew that I loved him and vice versa, it was also decided that it did need to be said. How ever often you felt necessary.

                  It is nice to have your feeling validated and it is nice to feel that someone feels that strongly about you. So i dont think that, in general, that it can be over used.
                  Got together Jan 3, 2011~ Closed the Distance March 23, 2012~ Living Together Since June 19 2012~ Future TBD......

                  I miss you more than I ever could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal." ~ Vita Sackville-west

                  Comment


                    #10
                    To the people who are arguing for that it can be oversaid, it sounds, though, like your main reasons are that it should be said with meaning, not because it's habit or to fill the silence or, as someone in a separate conversation I had earlier said, "a punctuation." What if someone says it frequently but means every one of those three words? Sure, like megfashion said, some are more "meaningful" than others (for example, when he uses my name or says he loves me so much or includes a "honey," it makes my heart and stomach flip), but if someone says "I love you" because they mean it and feel it, not because it's to fill a pause, can it still be oversaid? It sounds like you're talking more about intention than quantity.

                    Thank you everyone for your responses.
                    { Our Story on LFAD }


                    Our Beginning
                    Met online: February 2009
                    Feelings confessed: December 2010
                    Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
                    Officially together since: 08 April 2011

                    Our Story
                    First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
                    Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
                    Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
                    Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013

                    Our Happily Ever After
                    to be continued...

                    Comment


                      #11
                      My SO and I say "I love you" many times throughout the day but it never loses it meaning. Occasionaly he'll say it to get away with something, like if he's farted or something :P But that's all in fun and I know tha the does actually mean it whenever he says it. I always try to put a lot of heart into it when I say it, becuase it's how I feel, and I want him to know just how much I love him when I say it. It's never gotten stale for us.
                      Together since: Feb 23rd 2005.
                      First met: June 13th 2006

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Eclaire View Post
                        To the people who are arguing for that it can be oversaid, it sounds, though, like your main reasons are that it should be said with meaning, not because it's habit or to fill the silence or, as someone in a separate conversation I had earlier said, "a punctuation." What if someone says it frequently but means every one of those three words? Sure, like megfashion said, some are more "meaningful" than others (for example, when he uses my name or says he loves me so much or includes a "honey," it makes my heart and stomach flip), but if someone says "I love you" because they mean it and feel it, not because it's to fill a pause, can it still be oversaid? It sounds like you're talking more about intention than quantity.

                        Thank you everyone for your responses.
                        That all depends on how often it's being said. Everyone has a different "number" for something that is overly done. I personally think saying it 2-3 times a day is enough for me. Anything more will be overly done in my personal opinion.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          I feel like "I love you" can lose it's meaning if you let it. Personally every time I say it, I make sure I feel it too. If I'm not feeling it I won't say it.


                          sigpic

                          Comment


                            #14
                            I guess it depends on the person, but it surely hasn't lost its meaning for me - and my SO and I say "I love you" a lot. We love to say it and we love to hear it. I'd be worried if she'd suddenly stop saying it.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              haha it's funny cause we have ways of saying I love You and we say it all the time.

                              when we're being serious - I love you / I love you so much
                              when we're being cute - I wuv you
                              when we're using our filipino accent - Hailabyu (and I reply with hailabyutu) lol
                              when he's feeling intensely loving he says - I fucking love you!

                              never gets old with us.
                              sigpic
                              Nobody knows who I really am
                              Maybe they just don't give a damn
                              But if I ever need someone to come along
                              I know you would follow me, and keep me strong

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