hello everyone im currently doing a international relationship however, prior to that my bf and i were living in the same country. in one of my previous post i explained that my bf and i met in Boston and from the moment we'e met it was a instant connect. however, all of this has been taken away from me in a blank of an eye. this past two weeks my bf was informed that his finical loans to finish his masters program here in Massachusetts has been stopped due to money shortage his country is having. he is currently located in Italy. this past week been so difficult for us both. he has broken up with me twice before because he wasn't sure on how to handle the situation he is in. however, i still stuck by him because i felt what we had shouldn't end due to his currently situations. so being the supportive person and risk taker as i am, i gave him ideas on how he may be able to return to the US. the government told him the only way he is allowed to return is to pay back 40,000 dollars. so his mother agreed to go ask a family member for help surly enough she declined him of that. so reality hit him that he wont be able to return till he graduates in January and take a test for his licence. so that will take a total of eight months. realizing i was making all the decision and he wasn't i decided it was best to end the relationship as he suggested. however, yesterday he video Skype me pleading and asking that we try this long distance relationship that im worth the eight months and that i have nothing to worry about that he loves me very much and im not worth losing. so we both agreed to keep communication going to have trust in each other and know that we can get through this. once he is done he will leave everything behind to be with me here in the US. you guys are probably wondering how old we are im 24 and he's 32.
any helpful suggestions?
any helpful suggestions?
Show your guy this forum, have him do some reading, and he'll see that so many of us are in the same predicament and manage pretty well. I'm not sure it'll be so easy to convince him just by telling him you're worth it, he may need to see for himself that it's not so unusual and plenty of people are very successful at it. Maybe he needs some concrete proof that LDR's work, especially temporary ones. He's 32, so he's no kid, and is probably more jaded regarding relationships than someone younger than him, so just telling him it'll be OK really may not be enough. Show him. Good luck, let us know how it works out for you!
). We loved one another, what we had was worth giving it a shot, but we also needed to see how we were going to make it work. We needed to think about how we would be able to see one another (how many times a year, who could afford going to who, etc.), what our expectations were for time commitments to talking/our relationship, what our expectations were in general, would he be okay entering a relationship with someone with an inflexible degree, and so on and so forth. I think once we sat down and really talked about how we were going to make it work and what our expectations were, it did two things: opened our line of communication for the conversation to happen in the future and proved to ourselves that it was doable. Perhaps in addition to what Moon said, you could both sit down and have a pragmatic conversation about how you plan to conduct this relationship and your expectations for it? It will also allow you to find your own suggestions that work for your own relationship, as well, and LFAD is a great place to figure out where to start/what are some things you can do.
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