Over-thinking and Paranoia

[iHeartt]

Ahhhh Paranoia - its so common for me to think the worst when I haven't heard from him in a while. Did he get into a wreck, is he hurt, does he not want to talk with me, am I boring, yada yada yada.... my brain is my own worst enemy at times!!!! But at the end of the day, when I hear his voice, just a simple "Hi Love", is all my little brain needs to make all those negative thoughts go far far away!!

[CountryGirl]

I feel like I get anxious too a lot. Sometimes he'll go all day without messaging me and it will make me worry that he's mad at me or something has happened. I guess I wonder sometimes too if he gets tired of me.. Like it has been said, paranoia can be our worst enemy. I get paranoid that my SO is getting tired of me when I see things I post on Facebook mysteriously vanishing. It feels like every time I post something romantic on there he removes it from his timeline. I cant bring it up to him because he'll call me paranoid.

[littlekakau]

I'm feeling this right now. It's driving me bananas!
He has his own reasons, it's not us, but I can't help thinking stupid things. But I'm sure it'll pass.

[summerkid]

I overthink and get paranoid too.. but for the strangest of reasons. It works in weird ways for me, but thankfully it doesn't happen often. If my SO were to go through personal issues and not talk to me, the general question in my head wouldn't be "am I boring, or does he not like me anymore" but " are we not close enough for him to want to talk through his issues with me, does he not trust me?, why is it that he doesn't come to me for support? " etc etc.. which doesn't really make sense either, because some people just prefer not to talk about their issues and need their space to go through them at their own pace, and I am one of those people. but for some reason, i overthink it if someone asks for space whle going through their issues.

[littlekakau]

When I think I'm getting over this overthinking paranoid I fail over again. It's pretty hard. I'm acting like a spoiled child. It makes me mad at myself.

[GFI_1155]

It happens to me also, I overthink everything. Sometimes when his phone is not working and all his emails are off, I feel like something bad happens to him and I start to think of crazy ideas. It drives me crazy and I worry too much (its happening now too).
I try to distract myself and calm down but those ideas keep coming back, so yeah I need confirmation that everything is ok.
Its really bad.

[kayla_622]

This happens to me so much. Its usually when he doesn't text me during his lunch break like he normally does or doesn't say goodnight to me the way he normally does. I always feel like I'm bugging him all the time too if i start the conversation too often. I'm sure I'm not but that thought is still there. Same goes with wanting to talk on the phone because of his job he is often really tired after work and I'm always unsure if I should call him or not because he may not feel like talking on the phone so sometimes I feel like I'm bugging him if I call. I'm sure sometimes he feels the same paranoia and over thinks things too but, he never tells me. haha

[KaityLynn]

You are not alone! I have the same problem. What if he is getting sick of me? Or doesn't want to wait around for me any more? What if he finds someone else? I think these things a lot. But, he assures me often that none of that will happen, and that he loves me with all his heart. Be honest with your SO and tell he/she that you sometimes have those thoughts. That's what I did. He remembers that now, and assures me. It doesn't annoy him either, he understands. Another thing that I do is, I think about how I feel about my SO. I am so truly in love with him and want to be with him for everything that I would could never find another or get sick of waiting for him. I think that if that's how I feel about him, and he tells me he loves me and trusts me and wants to wait for me, that is most likely how he feels too.

[Fltricia]

How long are you apart for? Englishman you mentioned that you were concerned about her patience.

[Purplette]

I still don't know. I am still confused even if I have already read all the answers in this thread. I am thorn in between being paranoid or trusting my instinct.

My SO has been so distant to me for a week now. That is after he went out with his so called cousins to be exact and its freaking me out

[differentcountries]

I allow myself 36 hours before becoming paranoid. Then I call, or text "If would be nice to hear from you", "I think the distance is stressful too" or something like that. And if he becomes vague about when we will be in contact next, I simply tell him I need to plan my life, too. It is ok to not be in contact for some time (sometimes we have not Skyped two days in a row), but he should be able to tell me "honey, I am tired/internet is down/I can't affort phone minutes" etc. Because I am not going to wait around, unless I told him it was ok to contact me whenever. I am glad I know the adress of his family and workplace, so I can contact them in case I was not able to contact me directly (though that has never happened, I am not sure who would contact me if something happened to him). Sometimes I get strange thoughts in my head, usually when things are a bit out of the ordinary for some reason.