He cheated.

[IWillWaitForYou]

My SO (well..not my SO anymore) has been with his ex the whole time we've been talking. He wasn't very discreet with it either, his ex (or I guess current GF) posted on his FB saying "I love you<3 (:"

Tore my heart up because just last night I was telling my best friend how I could see this future with him and everything. My story is no longer a success. I'm taking a break from dating for a very long time. This is the 3rd time I've been lied by a man in the past 6 months or so.

I'm kind of still in shock. I don't know what to do with myself.

[Louise_B]

Oh sweetie, i feel for you i really do. have you tried getting answers from him? i wouldn't give him the chance to worm his way out of it but at least an explanation of why his done it to you? Keep your head up! xx

[dragonlady]

so sorry to hear that! never can understand why they do that kinda stuff!
hope you feel better soon!

[JoeyBug]

I'm so sorry, this sucks! I've been in the same situation before with my previous LDR that was almost a success and marriage so I know how you feel, well I know how *I* felt and believe you must be feeling something similar! I'm sorry that you've had your heart broken

[dem&ter]

I'm so sorry about what are you going through. My ex did the same thing, he didn't say anything to me about his ex, but all of sudden they became friend on facebook, talked to each other frequently. When I asked him about that, he did all defense, and I chose to trust him. Only one day after, he changed his relationship status for being with her. Girl, I know this is not easy for you. I feel you! In my situation my ex totally betrayed me, it doesn't matter anymore about his reasons why. He betrayed me. End of story.

But I think, you still deserve his explanation. If he's not doing something obvious about he and his ex, then don't make any assumption. If it had to be over, it's better if you did a decent break up instead of the ugly one.

Once again, I'm so sorry about this situation

[IWillWaitForYou]

Thanks to all of you. I do expect an explanation from him when he tries to talk next. He will probably just avoid me though. I asked him bluntly if him and his ex were still together and I am now patiently awaiting his answer. To be honest, if he just tells me straight forward that he is, I will leave him having a lot more respect for him than if he tries to make excuses.
I'm very much just in shock really. I never saw it coming and we haven't even said I love you to each other yet, for fear of rushing, but we would always hint at it. Then she goes on his FB and says I love you? That hurt.
The only excuse I can think of is that she just said it and he has no idea yet, but that's unlikely. He's lied to me before but we talked it out and I told him that I gave him back my trust 100%. I'm starting to regret doing so.
I appreciate the condolences. I'll most likely be informing you of his explanation just so you can give me your opinions.
It's funny how it hurts so much that I can't even cry about it. My head accepts it but my heart won't. It's painful.

[ThePiedPiper]

I was going to say that "I love you" is something friends say between friends sometimes. There are friends - yes, male ones too - who I have love feelings for that I expressed those to while in a relationship. But then you said that he lied to you before and that he's your third partner/male interest in 6 months (and the two before have ended similarly) and all of that adds up to the greater possibility that something is going on. I'm sorry this happened, but I think taking some time to single will be what's best for you and what's in your best interest. To have gone through three people in 6 months suggests that you're not processing the end of those relationships or taking the time you need to take care of you, and I think that that's the big problem and why you keep finding yourself in this situation. I know that it doesn't seem like it, but taking the time to be single and to process a horribly hurtful situation like this can often help us prevent it in the future or at least catch it a lot earlier. Hang in there, and make an effort to take care of yourself in this next while.

[Thanh]

I have also read some other threads of sad breakups but never tried to shared my feelings until now...
Im so sorry it ends in the sad way, but trust me, it is just making you better and stronger in your soul and mind. I'm a good example here...

7 years ago I fell for an australian man. Although he loved me very much and I still can prove it totally, somehow he also tore my heart into pieces then put it together more in love with him, just to tore it again and again but I kept forgiving... The craziest thing I got from him is when i was with him in his home in Oz, he brought another girlfriend home because it was her birthday and because of me he couldn't go to see her in another state, thats why she was there with us (you bet, that girl was a desperate girl!). I was alone in his country so I had no choice but stayed till I got the flight back home....

2.5 years after the breakup, I fell in love with another man from the US. We never met in person but the connection was very strong with certain actions and plans... A day after Christmas that year, a message was sent to me by someone else, saying he died in a car accident. It was a lie that I found out some time later...

1 year later, I fell in love again with another man also from the US. He was better than perfect... One day he found out he got cancer and stopped contacting me. I was crashed one more time in my life but I'd still rather lived with him than giving up on him. Finally I got us talked through all the problems I would have had to face if I wanted to move to the US and live with him. Then he hired a lawyer to get a visa for me. He got medication the whole time, some days weak, some days fine... After I packed up my life here, said bye to my family and friends, I was on the way for him. But God never forgot his plan for me - keeping me in miseries for longer. The night before the flight I stayed in a hotel close to the airport, I got a call from him but it was his brother, said he died of shock following an important operation, told me I didnt need to fly there anymore... And yes, after some time, I found out I was fooled again...

Those stories are very long and crazy to sum in a few sentences but I tried my best of telling, Im sure lots of things dont sound to make sense, but all can be explained certainly if in details... I just wanted to make you feel better by telling my much worse stories.

Those men have destroyed me completely. I still feel hurt deeply and cry everytime I look back at my past. Sometimes I cant believe how I got through... But we cant change the past, only can live the best for the present... And we will be fine eventually...

[IWillWaitForYou]

That was just a rough estimate. It's been longer than that and the past two didn't last long at all because of those reason.

He explained. Said he's been meaning to tell me but hasn't gotten the chance. I can't even begin to process this. I'm done.

[chizatlauren]

I just wish I can give you a hug right now... Being cheated on is always painful. Things will get better, so hang on. Life is full of pleasant surprises and I hope you'll find that one man who'll love you for real someday.

[IWillWaitForYou]

I just wish I can give you a hug right now... Being cheated on is always painful. Things will get better, so hang on. Life is full of pleasant surprises and I hope you'll find that one man who'll love you for real someday.

Thank you x

[Dezface]

I missed this thread yesterday. Big hugs to you, I have an idea how you feel. You'll make it through, I promise.

[Kristin91]

I'm so sorry this happened to you! Take some time for yourself, and one day a man will come into your life who will treat you like a QUEEN!

[MeganK]

Im sorry to hear that I hope you find a good man when youre ready to look again.
I know how you feel as well my fiancé was still in touch with his ex when we first started talking
luckily he decided he wanted me more and cut off all ties with her.

[libelle]

I am both sad and happy for you, dear... First, I am sorry about what happened to you - no one deserves to go through the pain of the loved one betraying them, and there are no excuses to help the one who has done it ...
But then again, (sorry if it is so rash) I congratulate you for what happened There is a good side to everything and i think the good side is bigger than the bad one. That person was not worth having you and did not deserve your love, you know his true side now and he wont have a chance (if you dont give him one) to harm you anymore. Everyone has a head on their shoulders they can think with, if one doesnt want to cheat, they wont. Sooner or later he will understand what he missed. But focus on yourself now and not him. I believe everything in life happens for a reason, and it always teaches us how to be a little stronger, to be a little better people. Yes it will take time, but when your heart heals you will be stronger than before And knowing the pain he caused you, you will never turn in the excuse of a person he is.
And also, most importantly, i believe there is someone right for everyone somewhere out there. Again - everything happens for a reason. So if this happened to you, it just got you closer to the person who is The One for you, who will treasure, cherish and return the love that you will give him <3 Stay strong