Hi guys! Im new here, and I tried to see if there was some post about my question. I don't think so, so here I am.
Me and my boyfriend are in LDR. We are perfect together and the distance will end in July, and we love each other so deeply. Everything is going well and we are very good in conflit-resolutions and communication.
But what brings me here it's a feeling I've been having. I am a university student and I also work every weekend. Mostly to get experience and money for the whole LDR. My boyfriend has a super cool job and only works during the week. To me his life seems a lot more exciting than mine: he lives in a cool country, nice job, nice house; and I feel I am stuck here in a country in a huge economic crises, studying something I don't like, with no time for myself and more than that, my best friends from faculty are now in exhange programmes. So I feel pretty alone. I feel that he has a lot more interesting plans with friends and family than I do and it is not because I don't want to... So for him this LDR seems easier, but as he says, he is out there without me and that is hard as well too!
But now something else happened: we have a month until we see each other again. Every week until there he is full of plans with friends he does not see in years and is going with them abroad, vacations with family, a very nice national holiday which he and everyone else around talkes to me about...! You see the picture. I have to stay to work and to go to school but I feel alone.
I feel part of me is so unhappy and miserable that he is doing all of this! He says "its going to be quick. Only some weeks and then I fly to you", but for me this seems unfair: of course for him the time passes quickly, with so many activities. Yesterday I said some 'bad' things but I realised that I was leaving him sad. He can not do anything and the solution its not that he is lonely. I acknowledge that and said "I am so sorry, this is so hard for me and I try to feel better, but it is hard. It's nice that one of us is full of plans". It's a pitty and it's awful, but I cannot joy them on vacations and my BF knows how I feel and understands me at some level. I just can't shake this feeling!
I can't change things because I have no time with work and school. I'm not trying to play some self-pitty game here, but I feel he has never been in my situation so he cannot help me. He already does everything he can to make this easier.
I should mention that he is then only going to be with me for a weekend...
Have any of you been in this situation?
I need advice... I need to cope with this. I don't want him ever to give up his plans, I'm just sad and frustraded and cry myself to sleep because he is spending all of this time with them and not with me. It's not his fault, it's a coincidence. But still I feel like this... Whenever he his having great plans I feel anxious and feeling he is not missing me. I think at the end of the day I am just sad he is not having all that blast with me.
Any help? any advice? Any "I've been there''? Oh I really need some lights here.
Sorry if this may seem selfish and a matter of envy. I would love not to feel this, it makes me feel awful and a bad person. But I still feel this and I need to deal with it!
Thank you all in advance!
Me and my boyfriend are in LDR. We are perfect together and the distance will end in July, and we love each other so deeply. Everything is going well and we are very good in conflit-resolutions and communication.
But what brings me here it's a feeling I've been having. I am a university student and I also work every weekend. Mostly to get experience and money for the whole LDR. My boyfriend has a super cool job and only works during the week. To me his life seems a lot more exciting than mine: he lives in a cool country, nice job, nice house; and I feel I am stuck here in a country in a huge economic crises, studying something I don't like, with no time for myself and more than that, my best friends from faculty are now in exhange programmes. So I feel pretty alone. I feel that he has a lot more interesting plans with friends and family than I do and it is not because I don't want to... So for him this LDR seems easier, but as he says, he is out there without me and that is hard as well too!
But now something else happened: we have a month until we see each other again. Every week until there he is full of plans with friends he does not see in years and is going with them abroad, vacations with family, a very nice national holiday which he and everyone else around talkes to me about...! You see the picture. I have to stay to work and to go to school but I feel alone.
I feel part of me is so unhappy and miserable that he is doing all of this! He says "its going to be quick. Only some weeks and then I fly to you", but for me this seems unfair: of course for him the time passes quickly, with so many activities. Yesterday I said some 'bad' things but I realised that I was leaving him sad. He can not do anything and the solution its not that he is lonely. I acknowledge that and said "I am so sorry, this is so hard for me and I try to feel better, but it is hard. It's nice that one of us is full of plans". It's a pitty and it's awful, but I cannot joy them on vacations and my BF knows how I feel and understands me at some level. I just can't shake this feeling!
I can't change things because I have no time with work and school. I'm not trying to play some self-pitty game here, but I feel he has never been in my situation so he cannot help me. He already does everything he can to make this easier.
I should mention that he is then only going to be with me for a weekend...
Have any of you been in this situation?
I need advice... I need to cope with this. I don't want him ever to give up his plans, I'm just sad and frustraded and cry myself to sleep because he is spending all of this time with them and not with me. It's not his fault, it's a coincidence. But still I feel like this... Whenever he his having great plans I feel anxious and feeling he is not missing me. I think at the end of the day I am just sad he is not having all that blast with me.
Any help? any advice? Any "I've been there''? Oh I really need some lights here.
Sorry if this may seem selfish and a matter of envy. I would love not to feel this, it makes me feel awful and a bad person. But I still feel this and I need to deal with it!
Thank you all in advance!
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