So I and my SO had planned a trip this summer, which was supposed to be going to her place for 3 weeks. So I asked my parents about it and they both agreed that I could not go because I had never been on a plane alone before, I got very sad, but I understood them. Then first thing was when I had to deviler the bad news to my SO, she just bursted out crying at the second I told it to her, it was terrible.
A few days went by and we both got "over" the fact that it was not possible for me to come see her this year, and never she was able to come here because of something I'll write later. So we discussed that it was still a fairly new relationship and it wouldn't hurt to get to know each other better and that was a good thing, and that is almost 4 months ago, and I can tell that I know her way better know that I did before, anyway:
We have spend a lot of hours planning on how our meeting next year is going to be. We litterally have almost every little single detail planned expect a few basic things which doesn't really matter. We know which airlines, we know that I'll stay at her place for 3 weeks, then we'll take the plane back together from her place to stay another 3 weeks at my place. We have planned a lot of places we're going to, what we're going to do together at home, our small trips out our town, etc. Everything is planned. Now there's just one thing back.
Both our parents know that we're in a relationship. I've been emailing a lot with her step father actually writing him my life story more or less. My parents know about her too and so on. I haven't really talked too much about our meeting next year with my parents, but they said I could go next year as a gaurantee, so I am certain that I am coming to her, but...
She has an abusive mother. She hits her, screams at her for nothing, gives her scars, threatens her, threatens our relationship.
She once took out their WiFi in their house and took her laptop and phone so we weren't able to communicate at all. She did this for 3 days. It's not like her mother hates me, she has seen me too and all and said that she actually liked the guy her daughter liked which apparently was something rare, but as my SO says she has some mental moody problems, which also includes letting all her anger out on her daughter with no reason at all.
So a few days ago her mother came home and she immediately started to scream and shout at her, and hit her with some wooden spoon. Her mother told her she hated her and that she was worth nothing and that she never would let her come see me or let me stay in their house, never. She also said that she never would let her study in the US. (Which is a very determined plan she has, studying in the US when she have graduated from her current school in Turkey)
Her mother was apparently hitting her really hard with that spoon again, so her step father had to get in and stop them, and her mother just wouldn't stop shouting. It all ended up with my SO and her step sister going to my SO's grandparents staying there for some time, and they're still there right now.
She called me crying really bad after the incident, and told me all this. It made me angry yet so sad. Her mother is insane.
She wants me to come to the US with her in a 3 years time so we can study there together, that has however, never been my plan. I have quite some very good plans here in Denmark of what i am going to do. She says it will be very hard if I don't come with her, and I suppose that's true. She says that she is scared that I will fall in love with somebody else, I try to let her understand that I can't and will not because I love her.
We we're talking about this yesterday. Suddenly she was like "What if we never meet? What it nothing works out?" (We are never mets as you can conclude) And I immediately started to get teary eyes and I just said that everything will work out fine. She told me to promise her to never get out of her life because she can't live without me, even if we arent in a relationship. I know this is probably very naive and such but I really really don't see myself in a relationship with anybody else than her. I promised that I would never let go of her in my life and that she should not let go of me either. I also said that I promised to never leave her and she said that she would never leave me either, only if I fell in love with someone else, then she would. I told her again, that it's impossible, because that person will never have the same things as I have with her.
She noticed my voice had changed she said that she was sorry for upsetting me and she started to cry herself. I told her she didn't upset me, I said that it was just very hard realizing the cold hard reality.
I have realized that there is a chance that we will never actually meet despite us loving each other so incredible much. I have never had such a strong bond with anyone ever in my life and she have this feeling too. We both really really love each other.
We were skyping, and she was very sleepy so she didn't really talk she was more whispering in a very low voice, the most cutest thing ever. As she was doing this I couldn't help but to get tears again. Maybe I would never hear this beautiful voice in front of my face. That killed me.
So yes, the hard reality is that there's a good chance that we might never meet because of her abusive mother and future doesn't seem too bright too because she wants to study in the US at NYU and she wants me to go with her, which I really want to, but not sure at all I can do that. We can only meet each other every summer break..
I don't know what to do, everything doesn't seem to bright about our future.
It's hard to face reality sometimes. I don't want to lose this beautiful person. She is the only person I have ever felt that really loved me.
A few days went by and we both got "over" the fact that it was not possible for me to come see her this year, and never she was able to come here because of something I'll write later. So we discussed that it was still a fairly new relationship and it wouldn't hurt to get to know each other better and that was a good thing, and that is almost 4 months ago, and I can tell that I know her way better know that I did before, anyway:
We have spend a lot of hours planning on how our meeting next year is going to be. We litterally have almost every little single detail planned expect a few basic things which doesn't really matter. We know which airlines, we know that I'll stay at her place for 3 weeks, then we'll take the plane back together from her place to stay another 3 weeks at my place. We have planned a lot of places we're going to, what we're going to do together at home, our small trips out our town, etc. Everything is planned. Now there's just one thing back.
Both our parents know that we're in a relationship. I've been emailing a lot with her step father actually writing him my life story more or less. My parents know about her too and so on. I haven't really talked too much about our meeting next year with my parents, but they said I could go next year as a gaurantee, so I am certain that I am coming to her, but...
She has an abusive mother. She hits her, screams at her for nothing, gives her scars, threatens her, threatens our relationship.
She once took out their WiFi in their house and took her laptop and phone so we weren't able to communicate at all. She did this for 3 days. It's not like her mother hates me, she has seen me too and all and said that she actually liked the guy her daughter liked which apparently was something rare, but as my SO says she has some mental moody problems, which also includes letting all her anger out on her daughter with no reason at all.
So a few days ago her mother came home and she immediately started to scream and shout at her, and hit her with some wooden spoon. Her mother told her she hated her and that she was worth nothing and that she never would let her come see me or let me stay in their house, never. She also said that she never would let her study in the US. (Which is a very determined plan she has, studying in the US when she have graduated from her current school in Turkey)
Her mother was apparently hitting her really hard with that spoon again, so her step father had to get in and stop them, and her mother just wouldn't stop shouting. It all ended up with my SO and her step sister going to my SO's grandparents staying there for some time, and they're still there right now.
She called me crying really bad after the incident, and told me all this. It made me angry yet so sad. Her mother is insane.
She wants me to come to the US with her in a 3 years time so we can study there together, that has however, never been my plan. I have quite some very good plans here in Denmark of what i am going to do. She says it will be very hard if I don't come with her, and I suppose that's true. She says that she is scared that I will fall in love with somebody else, I try to let her understand that I can't and will not because I love her.
We we're talking about this yesterday. Suddenly she was like "What if we never meet? What it nothing works out?" (We are never mets as you can conclude) And I immediately started to get teary eyes and I just said that everything will work out fine. She told me to promise her to never get out of her life because she can't live without me, even if we arent in a relationship. I know this is probably very naive and such but I really really don't see myself in a relationship with anybody else than her. I promised that I would never let go of her in my life and that she should not let go of me either. I also said that I promised to never leave her and she said that she would never leave me either, only if I fell in love with someone else, then she would. I told her again, that it's impossible, because that person will never have the same things as I have with her.
She noticed my voice had changed she said that she was sorry for upsetting me and she started to cry herself. I told her she didn't upset me, I said that it was just very hard realizing the cold hard reality.
I have realized that there is a chance that we will never actually meet despite us loving each other so incredible much. I have never had such a strong bond with anyone ever in my life and she have this feeling too. We both really really love each other.
We were skyping, and she was very sleepy so she didn't really talk she was more whispering in a very low voice, the most cutest thing ever. As she was doing this I couldn't help but to get tears again. Maybe I would never hear this beautiful voice in front of my face. That killed me.
So yes, the hard reality is that there's a good chance that we might never meet because of her abusive mother and future doesn't seem too bright too because she wants to study in the US at NYU and she wants me to go with her, which I really want to, but not sure at all I can do that. We can only meet each other every summer break..
I don't know what to do, everything doesn't seem to bright about our future.
It's hard to face reality sometimes. I don't want to lose this beautiful person. She is the only person I have ever felt that really loved me.
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