How long do you stay?

[peppypenguin]

To be honest I think it depends on how far apart you are. When I was living in England and my SO was in France, we would each visit for a long weekend since it was just about an hour and a half plane ride. But now that I am in the US and he is in England that's not quite as feasible considering the amount of money and travel it takes for one of us to get to the other. But for anyone it really just depends on how much you can afford, I think.

[Roo]

I luckily have a very flexible job situation that allows me to take long strips of time off as often as I need. So the last two times I was with my SO, I stayed 86 and 89 days respectively. Basically as much and as often as the US border people will allow me. I have not been sent back yet, I have my fingers crossed. Next time I'll be flying to Boston will be July 19th, which means having stayed out of the US for almost four months. I'll be flying back with my baby and hoping hard that that four months is enough. As I will be traveling together with my girlfriend, after her first Finnish visit of two weeks, I'm unsure of whether us arriving together will play into anything. I know we'll have to take different lines at primary inspection.

This will hopefully be our last year as two people living on different continents. Then we will seriously look into the fiancee visa thing. Which, again, will most likely mean an entire, cold, lonely winter in Finland. And a ton of paperwork. But after that, if everything goes right, we will be together forever, as wife and wife.

It's a headache, but totally worth it.

[jana89]

For us the travelling isn´t that hard, since we are both in European Union, there is no visa and the flight only takes something over an hour + about 2 hours in train. Anyhows, I study, so I can´t really afford to fly as often as I would like to, and my SO is very busy, so he can´t leave because of the job. I was going to Denmark for summer (3 months) and once I was there for just a week. But I was seriously thinking about doing a surprise visit on New Years Eve, which would only be for like 24 hours, but eventually I didnt find cheap enough tickets, so I couldnt go.

[differentcountries]

Strange to see this thread again Our longest visit was this summer of 22 days (my husband staying 7-8 days of those). I usually stay 8 days a month as I have a week off as my writing week with work (yes, I am working!). The hardest thing is affording to live 2 places but then we have lots of space, a washing machine, room for my husband and so on. I used my tax refund the first 6 months, I hope renting in off-season is a lot cheaper since we are due to renew the contract.

[Mims27]

Looks like I've not replied to this thread yet... When she lived in Atlanta I would go see her for 7 to 10 days but we'd see each other once every 6 months. When she moved to PA with her family, we decided that shorter but more frequent vists would be better. So now I usually go (or she comes here) Friday to Monday, but lately we've been seeing each other once per month! It's really nice to be able to drive to see each other as opposed to fly. I like that much more! And this way I can spread out my vacation days.

[Redheart14]

My stay is usually 1-2 nights

[Moon]

For us, being out in the working world and not being students, months long stays are impossible, we're limited by how much vacation time we get per year. Our visits have ranged anywhere from a week, to 3.5 weeks, though a week and a half of that was for work. Generally, we manage a two-week stay once during the year, and two one week stays, though that varies quite a bit. It doesn't matter how far apart we are, or how expensive the travel is, that's all we can do because of holding down career-type of jobs. I'm fortunate to be an American with 4 weeks vacation a year, that's a pretty OK amount of time for us, but it does prevent me from looking for other opportunities where I might only get a week or two of time off a year.

[Petals]

Our first visit was 3 weeks and second visit 2 months. Our next visit will be 1 - 2 months depending on how much time my SO can take off work. A flight for us costs $3000 with 3 connections and about 24hrs flying. It's not worth it for us to have a visit that's less than 3 weeks.

September is barely moving arrgghhh...2015 hurry up please!

[Miasmata]

Since my SO is close to finishing his Master's degree, it really varies how much time he has for visits. Depending on his current task in his project group, he sometimes can work from home, sometimes he has to do stuff in the lab, so it's really hard to say how long he can stay. His shortest visit was for 6 days, his longest for 3 weeks. On the third one, this Fall, he'll stay for 10 days.

My own time depends entirely on school vacation since I started attending classes again, so my visit in December is limited to how long the school is closed for Christmas.

[JaneEmily]

Our first ever visit was 6 days. Then the second was 8 nights, and now on average it's between 10-13 days. Our next visit will be three weeks long though!

[VeraRyan]

Our first visit was 2 weeks, second will be 1,5 and 3d will be 2 weeks. Even though the tickets are expensive we both have jobs that dont allow us to travel for much longer...

[farandaway]

Our very first visit was only less than 3days but it was still perfect. I was on that continent for other reasons already. When I flew to him it was exactly 2 weeks. My next visit very soon will be a couple days short of 2 weeks. We're trying to arrange our lives so that we can each bring work with us and that will allow longer visits. Well, at least for him since I can't leave my kids for much longer. A weekend visit is out of the question. Timewise, moneywise and also emotionally it's easier for me to stay apart than to meet for a very short time and have to leave again.

[differentcountries]

I can very much reccomend bringing work

[TaraMarie]

Our visits are fri-sun, every other weekend. But we do vacation together four times a year for 8 days. We are going on vacation in ten days! Hopefully this will all end at the end of this year. We are working on closing the distance!

[BlueCat]

Our shortest visit was his first one to meet me, which wasn't all that short at just over 2 months. Every visit since then was at least the 90 day max stay, and we've also done some 6 month visits and one year long stint of him living here with me. Currently, we're 11 months in to what is looking to be at least an 18 month separation. I would give anything for a week right now. Granted, it takes a minimum of 26 hours each way, but still.