Is he playing me?

[Unconditional]

JaneEmily has a great point in her final paragraph.
Also, those people that told you he's playing you...remember, they dont know him like you do.

[Hollandia]

Are these people that know him personally? Or are they just other people online that have said this, or even.........just your own friends that don't know him?

Don't jump to conclusions just because you've heard through the grapevine. Most likely people say about others is BS.

You have to realise you guys are only friends for now, right? He can choose who he wants to "play around with" as much as he likes, and if he is too busy on his thesis which should be of high importance because it's to do with his own future - which could affect you both if you do turn out to have a relationship where he'll need a good job to save up for visits/closing the distance (IF you two do turn out having a full on relationship), which education can give you. If you want to be exclusive, then ask if there's a chance to be that. You can't just expect to be exclusive just because he told you he likes you in some way. And for him to drop everything for you when you're just friends for now. Take it slow. 3 months of friendship before dating is barely anything, try getting to know each other more. Me and my SO were friends for a whole year and a half before we even admitted we liked each other and then became a couple. Just don't try too jump the gun too quick on something that needs to take time to grow.

It was over 6 months for us as friends.

[Unconditional]

I'm not telling I want him to spend more time on me rather than his thesis, I'm just saying if he likes me at least he must spend 15 minutes everyday to talk with me and if he doesn't like me, he'd better let me go.

And yes, we both decided not to date other people, I told him it's okay for him if he wants to see other people but he said he doesn't want to meet anyone.

You're right. It might be different in real life, but I'm sure I'm gonna even love him! He is my dream man.

Thank you very much for your comment.

Are you listening to yourself?! "He must" spend fifteen minutes talking to you every night? Sometimes they don't have time everyday.

Weren't you the one that let him go? Why then should he have to let you go?

It seems like you are only thinking of you and what you want. What about him?
This all just seems pretty selfish to me that's all.

[Hollandia]

If you were CD, I doubt you be as nitpicky about him spending certain amounts of time with you. I will say this, don't sit by the phone or computer waiting for his calls. Go live life, if you are meant to be, it will work out. If not, then not. A watched pot never boils and there is nothing that will drive you insane quicker than waiting by a phone for someone that does not have a lot of time to make calls.

How often do you two talk?

[JaneEmily]

It was over 6 months for us as friends.

I would've told my SO how I felt sooner had we been able to talk. He had no internet as his parents were going through a divorce and he had moved out to stay with his mum, and we never spoke but whilst he was gone - I didn't sit and wait for him, I went and got myself some education and just did my own thing ;D

[Kapwned]

It seems like he may have genuinely liked you, he was just busy paired with the realization that he wants to take it a bit slower. In the beginning it's easy to get caught up on cloud 9 and it seems you are sensitive to change and there's nothing wrong with that, you just need to learn to approach it carefully. It seems like you were treating it like you were already in a full fledged relationship when you hadn't made it official. Two months isn't a long time to know a person much less get into a relationship with routine and boundaries. You should consider yourself lucky that he has a good grasp on his feelings. As for when you said he should want to message you without asking, you might want to rid yourself of this kind of thought process. People aren't mind readers and sometimes you do have to take some initiative and express what it is that you like and want. The last bit might be something you may regret saying. That sounds rather threatening to me. You are letting your sensitivity get to the better of you.

[silvermoonfairy3]

Whoa there, OP. Slow down!
You've been talking to this guy less than 3 months, and you're coming across as incredibly needy and clingy and demanding, not to mention distrustful. From the sound of things, he's being pretty open and there's nothing IMO that indicates he's 'playing' you.

It sounds like you have VERY strict ideas of what constitutes someone liking you, and if they like you then they HAVE TO do X or Y (like spending 15 minutes per day minimum) etc. Relationships don't really work like that. You and this guy (or any guy that you want to be in a relationship with) will have to tweak things to suit your lifestyles, work obligations, family obligations, etc. and it will take compromise on both your parts.

There will be times when you're busier, or when he's busier. There will be times when, no matter how much you care, one of you won't WANT to talk on a particular day. Yes, a lot of times, your partner is that one person you'll want to talk to when you've had a bad day or things are stressful or whatever else.. but there will also be times when you just want to go to bed, or when you want to zone out mindlessly in front of the TV. That's okay. That doesn't mean that anyone cares less.

I agree with others who have said that you might be a bit unreasonable in some of these expectations you have. Take a breath, try to relax. This is the early stages, it should be fun and comfortable getting to know someone new.

Good luck!

[DistanceSucks]

I know since I'm a sensitive person, part of it is my own problem. I know I have to try to be patient.
And I have to mention I give him space all time, it's him who mostly messages me first. I even didn't text him for five days till he message me.
He just finished his thesis two days ago and still he doesn't spend enough time talking to me (while he isn't busy anymore)
I mean he was online and we were talking, replied my last message ONE HOUR later, when he was going to bed (he was online) My point is if a guy likes a girl, he enjoys having conversation with her.

[differentcountries]

Are you aware how exhausting it is to deliver a thesis? Last time I did that it was a little bit like like delivering a baby, exept it also feels like you give your baby away and up for inspection, I felt unreal at least a week. Also how do you know he has nothing to do? After my thesis I had lots of built up house chores, I had to plan for my thesis defense and I had to work since I did not have student loan anymore, so no not really a resting time until my defense was through. He probably enjoys your company a lot to talk to you during such a stressful time.

[p_b82]

Wow, I have to say you come across as exceptionally demanding..... getting upset because some-one didn't respond for an hour?

Just because it says some-one is online, doesn't mean they are infront of their pc/phone/tablet. How do you know he wasn't catching up on jobs, making some phone calls, popped out to the shop quickly etc etc.

I've only done a BSc but my dissertation was exhausting, and that was way smaller, and way less emotionally draining, a thesis is as above like a baby, and I've seen just how they affect a number of people who have done Masters or PHDs. The fact you got communication out of him at all is a huge sign he is interested. I shut myself off from the rest of the world in the month before my dissertation was due, and for about a week after if I remember correctly, after that it was frantically catching up with other people again and all the jobs I had put off!

[silvermoonfairy3]

He just finished his thesis two days ago

Does he have corrections to make? Job apps to now do? Articles to write, housework to catch up on that he hasn't done in weeks because he was preparing? Getting some actual rest, or seeing family?

I mean he was online and we were talking, replied my last message ONE HOUR later, when he was going to bed (he was online) My point is if a guy likes a girl, he enjoys having conversation with her.

He IS having conversation with you. Honestly, at this point, you can either trust that he likes you and give things a shot or move on. But if you move on, I'd suggest trying to learn from this and examining your expectations to see if they're maybe a bit unrealistic and unfair, because I think you're going to run into this time and again with guys if you can't keep that in check a little bit.
You're sounding kinda paranoid and definitely needy, and those don't tend to bring people closer.

Good luck.