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Time to let go of you :(

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    Time to let go of you :(

    Hello LDRers,

    It's come to that time, where we have made it 2 years but things went downhill before that. I came to visit in the summer, and he came here right after. But when he left it changed. I like to think life just sometimes changes and you don't realize it till you take the time to and sadly this change was not for the better. Two months ago He became more distant and busy, I felt quite neglected and tried as he did to make me feel better it just wasn't working.

    The next issue was realizing how different we are, how I am more extroverted and him introverted. I wanted to go to NYC for NYE to see a concert but he was coming then and had zero interest in doing that or anything like that ever...I just kept seeing more differences, and I feel in close distance you see these sooner but now things are coming full circle.

    Next, we had a plan, he was to come here and work or do a PhD but last year he told me he didn't like it here and could never live here. It broke my heart to pieces and his, but I understood why. He decided to stay to do a Masters and then expected me to make the move. Fast Forward a year, when once I was sure I was able to move I began spending more time with friends, family, and realized I am not ready to move either. I can't leave them behind...telling him this was hard but he seems to understand.

    I have put us on a break for a month but it's been a week and I feel I know my answer. It hurts so much to think someone is for you and then they end up not being that person, and seeing that your lifestyles are just not the same...

    So lovely people, I believe my LDR is ending, for a number of reasons as you can see. My question for everyone is what is the best way to go about ending things? Do these reasons seem to make sense? I love him with all my heart and want him happy but this is hurting us both, I see it more and more. And we are just unable to compromise on the move. Any thoughts and opinions would be great <3

    Rosie

    #2
    Rosie,
    I saw your post and didn't want to run and not say anything, your points are completely understandable and as you say life changes and people change, I don't really have any advice on how to end it but I just wanted to wish you all the best.
    It's hard to let go of someone who's taken up a lot of time and space in your life but sometimes its how it plans out.
    First met - June 2014
    Became official - 14 October 2014
    First meeting March 2015-S came to the UK
    I visited Arizona - June 2015
    I visited Arizona- November 2015
    2nd December 2015 - Got Engaged
    December 2015 - S came to England for Christmas with me
    May 2016- Closed the Distance!!!

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      #3
      I don't have any advice either, just wanted to say I am really sorry this is happening and sorry for the pain you both are/will be going through.
      I believe your reasons are valid.
      Take care, time will help with the pain.

      Comment


        #4
        Sometimes people grow apart and that is just the way life goes as you say.

        As you say, if neither of you are able or willing to relocate, then ultimately the relationship (in my mind) would be doomed; there are very few that would remain LDR's indefinitely over that sort of distance and timezones.

        Hope you are both able to go your separate way's and the break up doesn't hurt either of you too much

        Comment


          #5
          Thanks to those who have commented It makes me more assured of my decision. I just really hate breaking up with someone, esp long distance. But I like to think that getting over them will be easier with the distance separating us. I really do want the best for him! But I also want the best for me too. You all rock <3

          Comment


            #6
            This post reminds me of the suffering that was my ex.
            I never got to do ANYTHING fun cause she hated everything except reading :/
            Met: Apr 2013
            Mutual interest: July 2013
            Relationship Began: November 6 2013
            First Visit (Her to Me): July 4 2014
            Second Visit (Me to Her): Jan/Feb 2015 Postponed due to sister having baby
            Second Visit! (Her to Me again): June 16 2015 - July 4 2015
            Engaged: June 29 2015 <3
            Third Visit: (Her to me, working on it) January 19 2016 - February 2 2016

            Comment


              #7
              it's very hard and i'm sorry. all your points are correct. maybe this is the way to explain it. best of luck

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