Misconceptions that annoy me to no end about meeting someone online.

[Gingersquish]

Man, I thought I replied to this thread with something similar... maybe that was a different thread.

Anyway, see above. I have to constantly deal with this crap every time I go home because no one can seem to accept the fact that he is a genuine person on the internet. Who the hell am I, then?!

I know how you feel. Okay my mum's still not met him, but 5 months into a relationship and she still doesn't trust him or me! Even though we have met several times >.<

[kittyo9]

I know how you feel. Okay my mum's still not met him, but 5 months into a relationship and she still doesn't trust him or me! Even though we have met several times >.<

I went home for Thanksgiving and visited a friend's mom who is very chatty and loves to talk to me and my best friend about life, since she's also good friends with my best friend's mom. As much as I love her, I did not appreciate how quick she was to judge my relationship-- and this was AFTER my SO and I had met in person, and we'd been together for more than 2 years. She gave me the full "you can't be too careful on the internet" pat down, probing me with questions and debating EVERY piece of evidence that he was a genuine person with good intentions even before we met in person. And, at 22, having previously met friends in person that I had originally met online (none of which turned out to be stalkers or rapists, omg), I am still considered foolish, and my predicament a "problem"-- the actual word my parents had used to describe my plans to visit my SO to her when they ran into her at the store. "We're having this problem."

Yes, I'm so foolish to want to spend some of the money I worked for to go visit a man who has devoted two years of his life and several hundred dollars of hard-earned savings into failed visas-- which I have receipts for, documented-- to be with me.

I get really tired of being treated like my relationship isn't real.

[Gingersquish]

this was AFTER my SO and I had met in person, and we'd been together for more than 2 years. She gave me the full "you can't be too careful on the internet" pat down, probing me with questions and debating EVERY piece of evidence that he was a genuine person with good intentions even before we met in person.

Oh my Gosh, after 2 years? Now that really is ridiculous! Hope I don't encounter the same...

As long as you know your safe, we're all here for you, so you can 'forget' their opinions

[rina]

I must say this bothers me too, how people's first reaction is OMG PERVERT/KILLER etc., but on the other had my SO and I are lucky enough to not have to go through that. My friends have been excited to meet him when he was here and his family seems excited to meet me when i'll visit them in 2 days. Probably due to the fact that we have been speaking for almost 5 years and everyone got pretty used to us knowing each other. Everyone thought we were a couple for years..

Actually to be honest, all the talk we're getting from family is the typical normal talk you get in any relationship: USE CONDOMS! DONT GET PREGNANT! which actually is quite refreshing to be told (even if we're both 25, but.. moms and grannies.. we all know how those are!). It shows people aren't treating our relationship as a freak internet show but more as a normal usual relationship; even my great granny who is 94 years old and has no clue what the internet is (i explained we talk on the phone a lot and thought letters) is pretty happy for us and hoping we'll have a great holiday together. I was so surprised to hear her only worry is me flying when it's snowing out, of course.. after "the talk".

But honestly, i think people fear what they cannot understand and what they have not experienced, so i don't let it bother me when i hear weird remarks about online dating, again, not addressed to my relationship, but in general.

[Mellow]

I think most people have strange ideas about meeting someone special on the internet due the fact that it is relatively new, and the only times that it is actually on television or in the newspapers, the story is about how it went wrong. Yes, ofcourse that can happen, but that can happen in real life too! You never know what will happen...
The next generation probably has it much easier considering meeting someone on the internet. These days, datingsites seem to be getting more and more popular... Maybe is some years it'd actually be accepted? I feel like these sites are slowly opening gates for other ways of meeting people online, that it becomes a bit more normal. Really slowly.

I have to admit, I met my boyfriend online too. On a mmorpg called "Eden eternal". Wasn't looking for love at all, it just happened.
One of my friends know, and she doesn't mind at all. She is really happy for me.
My parents reaction... I have no idea how that would go. My mother knows I chat with people from the games I play, and she doesn't seem to mind me being friends with them. But whether she'd react well on me actually dating someone that I met on the internet..... I don't know. Maybe I should let her talk with my boyfriend through skype to prove that he's not a creeper?


Imagine how internet dating was like 5 years ago....

[kittyo9]

Imagine how internet dating was like 5 years ago....

It was roughly the same, although I do think sites devoted specifically to finding matches are gaining much more widespread acceptance. :P

[Mellow]

mhnm, true. At least it proves that there is a small improvement in the situation, right?
And thats a good thing

[itzmesisca]

That's so true. I don't think I want to meet someone if I never webcam with them at all. I mean, you need to at least see if their picture real or fake. Also, you need to be sure you really know they are not lying to you about their identity.

[Kaisukaru]

This reminds me of my father yelling "He does not even exist!" in the living room a few days ago.

[kayla_622]

I sure have trusted my "online instinct" they'd never been wrong before...

I think most of us have different environments were we are more comfortable, and our instincts are usually better tuned to those environments...

I seem to have this "online instinct" as well. I can tell when someone is who they say they are and when they aren't. I had met my SO through an IRC chatroom and we had known each other at first as just some other person that was always in the chat and it was like that for about 7 months. Over 7 months though I saw how he was and how he handled things..he even would mention stuff happening in his life so, I always had this vibe from him that he was a good honest guy and not some creeper. One day he was very drunk and sent me a private message and told me that he's always found me interesting and wanted to meet up for a movie that very weekend. I know it was probably very foolish of me but, I went for it. I knew what he looked like since we were friends on facebook but, we had never skyped or even talked privately before this. So, I met up with him alone and we've been together ever since. If I had had any feeling whatsoever though that this guy may not be who he says he is I would have never gone for it but I trusted my instincts and I'm really glad I did.

This is not to say that everyone should do what I did. I should have definitely been more careful because you really never know who you might be talking to on the internet if you never see a pic or skype with them but, I really think that most people you meet online are actually who they say they are and not this strange person who is just out to rape and kill you like a lot of people seem to think.

[mellissawest]

My SO and I met on FB game called Vampire clan wars..
we started chatting and a few years later we started a relationship. Still havent met eachother in person but we did SKYPE once. It was a total suprise for me that he did that.
My friends and family all are suprised that i did this. I was told that he wasout for a visa - he is out to get my money.

I just try to be a duck and let it all roll off.

[Hemuuuli]

There was a recent study about internet dating resolving divorces. It was because you will most likely start dating with a person that you share a lot of in common and like talking to. It is less about looks and intial crush that fade a away quicker. So statistically it is better for you. I don't care about statistics but having them to back up your argument about online dating is handy.