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Is It Over?

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    Teens Is It Over?

    I probably shouldn't be making this right now because of how recently this happened (hell its going on as I speak im multi-tasking) but anyways.

    Me and my GF met online about 9mo ago. we love eachother to death and want to send the rest of our lives together.

    but then my phone broke and we were only able to text on my computer (no mic) and that was hard enough. three weeks ago now I got my computer taken away because of a D and now I only get it on the weekends. my GF has taken this really hard and today she texted me this "Idk if this is working anymore ryan...."
    I was scared to death instantly that she was breaking up with me... when I probed a little I found that she dosent want to leave me but dosnt know if she wants to wait. she says she feels like were not even together anymore because we hardly talk and that she texted this wich is easily the scariest of all her text thruout the conversation "Its not just tht ryan! Its everyting! I cnt tak all of this anymore. Its too much. Theres no more butterflies or laughter or anyting else. I feel lik i
    HAV 2 b with u. I dnt wanna feel lik tht! I want 2 WANT 2 b with u. I dnt wann feel lik i HAV 2"


    i am desperate for any help or advice. she is my first love and i desperately do not want to loose her!

    heres the convo.

    Spoiler:

    [COLOR="#008000"]


    samantha
    Idk if this is working anymore ryan....


    me
    are you breaking up?


    samantha
    Idk ryan... I feel lik we arent even 2gether anymore


    me
    :'(


    me
    im stry i havnt been there for u



    me
    do you still love me?
    sam? :'(




    samantha
    This doesnt even feel real anymore... We nvr talk and when we do we fight or 1 of us gets upset or SOMETHING. I just dont know anymore ryan... I just dn
    t feel it anymore. I dnt even no wat im saying! I dnt no anymore ryan!



    me
    do you still love me?



    samantha
    I dnt even no who im supposed 2 b loving!



    me
    what do you mean?



    samantha
    I dnt even no u anymore ryan!



    me
    how do you not know me? :"(



    samantha
    Im loosing my mind ryan! All i tink about is whether i should try and stick this out with u or just leave! I hate it!



    me
    im sorry i haven't been there for you :""( im so sorry for that :'( im trying everything i can to talk to you and i still love you to DEATH! your the love of my LIFE and that will never change..... ive been a horrible BF lately and i feel like shit over it :'( but things WILL get better i promise you. :'(




    samantha
    Idk if i wanna wait 4 tht ryan. We go through this, or rather i do, everytime i talk 2 u. Thts not how these tings r supposed 2 b! :'( ik ur such a gd p
    erson and u absolutly deserve the best girl but idk if tht girl is me anymore! :'(



    samantha
    I dnt even no wat im saying ryan! I dnt wanna go but i dnt no if i should stay :'(



    me
    you are that girl and always have been that girl, there isn't any other girl on this planet i would rather have! and we DO NOT go thru this EVERYTIME :* there are times when we are loveydovey :* and thisis ALL because of the distance for one and for two because i don't have a computer or phone to talk to you...
    what do you mean "if you should stay"



    samantha
    idk if we should stay 2gether...




    me
    why shouldn't we?




    samantha
    Y should we?



    me
    because weve made it this far and 2 years is a short time to wait for the reward of 50+ years together



    samantha
    Ryan ive just lost all hope 4 us... I dnt no anymore! And now im being a fucking over dramtic bitch ugh!



    me
    becuse i love you and hope you love me too... becuse your the most amazing girl in the world and i don't want anyone els. becuse we have been thru soooo much together. becuse i will never give up or leave you. becuse i love you more than anything els in this entire world! becuse there is ALWAYS hope as long as Obama bin laden is in office (he said so!)



    me
    becuse its not going to be four years until we can talk on the phone and text all day and on the weekends talk all day and fall asleep on the phone with eachother everynigh and all the other stuff that i miss so much it hurts!
    or even two years. its going to be ALOT sooner than that :* please be paitent for me?



    me
    my parents will give my computer back and i will g a phone but you have to wait for me babygirl :*** please be strong for me?




    me
    and i cant even think becse of how scared i am right now :"( i love you



    samantha
    Its not just tht ryan! Its everyting! I cnt tak all of this anymore. Its too much. Theres no more butterflies or laughter or anyting else. I feel lik i
    HAV 2 b with u. I dnt wanna feel lik tht! I want 2 WANT 2 b with u. I dnt wann feel lik i HAV 2




    me
    you don't want to be with me?




    samantha
    Idk wat i want >.<





    me
    do you want someone els?




    samantha
    No




    me
    try and tell me how your feeling :*


    samantha
    I feel lik idk if i wanna say with u




    me
    why don't you want to be with me?




    me
    sam? :"(



    samantha
    I just feel lik this relationship is strained




    me
    :*** yes, this relationship is under stress. as is ALL relationships were you cant talk to your love that much :***** but it gets better :* trust me.



    me
    baby?




    samantha
    How r u going 2 say it gets bttr ryan? U dnt no tht! I dnt wanna stay and end up unhappy



    me
    becuse :* i know what we have is REAL LOVE :**** and i know that if we just stick it out a little bit longer then we will be together forever :***


    samantha
    Mayb i dnt wanna b 2gether 4ever alright? God damnit i cnt tak all of this 2gether 4ever crap. Its ALL the time ryan! >.<


    samantha
    Idk happys aggervate me -.-



    me
    what?



    me
    hunny :'( i want to be yours that's all i know


    samantha
    Idk ryan mayb im overreacting right now but sometings been bothering me about us. Its not just this week or this month but its been a while now and i cn
    t figure it out : (


    me
    what dose it feel like?


    samantha
    I feel lik we hav no emotional connection. I feel lik i could live without and idk! Ugh! >.<


    me
    do you still love me?


    me
    do you still love me?



    samantha
    alk 2 them? Wel if it is then no i dnt love u. Not being able 2 talk 2 u has just kinda jaded me 2 this whole situation ryan... This is exactly wat i di
    dnt want 2 happen! And i wanna work on it but i dnt fucking no how!
    Ryan i dnt even no wat love is! Ik i care! But idk how 2 define love! Is love constantly obsessing over some1? Is it having a panick attack when u cnt t



    me
    what do you feel when you imagine me not in your life? what do you feel when you imagine me with my arms around you?



    samantha
    Idk ryan... It wuldnt b much different compared 2 now... Ur nvr around. And i cnt




    me
    you cant what?



    samantha
    Picture me inur arms
    Last edited by kilax; October 6, 2013, 12:29 PM.

    #2
    Hi there Okay, first and foremost: I'm sorry you're going through this. I know it's hard to deal with. I'm going to try and be as reasonable as possible. The two of you are young--is she 15 as well? If so, that's a little too young to be thinking about spending the rest of your lives with this person. Hell, I know I wasn't thinking like that at 15. Ya'll are both still so young, and you have so much more to experience. From what I've gathered through what she's told you, it sounds like the idea of "forever" is scary to her--which is understandable. She's saying she doesn't know if this is what she wants for the rest of her life; you can't be in just a one-sided relationship. She's also mentioning not having an emotional connection with you. Have the two of you met in person yet? It sounds like she's unsure on where this relationship is going to go...which is completely understandable. To me, it sounds like she's leaning towards ending it. Ask her to open up and tell you what's really bothering her. She's giving you very spacey responses to me, which are all pretty much saying the same thing: she doesn't know, she's confused, her feelings aren't there. OR, give her some space. Leave her alone for a couple days to really think things through and then come back together and talk about it. Just a suggestion. Good luck!

    Comment


      #3
      I agree with RachelAnne, if she doesn't want to commit to this relationship you can't make her, and you should let her go. She's clearly unhappy this way, and 15 is really young for 'the rest of your life' still. So if she's not happy now, she probably won't be. It's really hard to leave someone you've been with for a while, but dragging it on is only going to make it harder for both of you. Sit down and have a good, serious talk. Don't say anything like 'but we should stay together', just let her make up her mind. It's unfair of her to drag you along longer than necessary as well, so it's best for the both of you to make a decision at this point. Really sorry you're going through this..

      Comment


        #4
        Id say leave her for a little while.
        Honestly it doesn't sound too good from her side, she keeps avoiding answering your 'do you still love me' with a clear answer...
        I once read 'if a woman does not say a clear yes to your question its most likely a no' not sure if that counts in every situation though!
        "If you say you can't, you just don't want to"

        Comment


          #5
          It seems like she's just being young and scared, which is totally understandable. It might do you well to reflect on some of the things she said and take your own feelings into consideration. You may not be as ready for this as you think. Forever is an extremely long time. My SO and I don't even use that word and we're 4-6 years older than you. Things change, and that's life. You'll be okay. Leave her alone and take some time to yourself. You'll discover that there's more to life and that you can move on without her. If things are meant to be, maybe in the future you two can try a relationship again.

          Comment


            #6
            thank you for the reply's. they were a lot of help. I am going to bring this up with her and ask her what's really going on later on tonight when I know we wont be interrupted.

            Comment

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