Bad luck ring?

[lucybelle]

Well guys, I spilled the beans to my mom about the marriage. She's ecstatic! And she asked me if I still wanted to use her wedding ring. I had totally forgot that I had even asked for it! It's a really really beautiful gold ring with little inlaid pink gold roses all around it. I've always loved it.

But! It's from her first marriage, the one that ended in DIVORCE dun dun dun! My SO kind of looked at me funny when I said I'd use hers. Like it was a "cursed ring" or something. But it's not like my parents had an awful marriage. They were happily married, then they fell out of love, had a "calm" divorce (meaning neither was fighting, crazy, trying to steal stuff, etc), now get along pretty well and are both happily re-married. I think that's pretty awesome.

So would you wear a ring that was from a marriage that ended in divorce? I think I will. I just love that ring. Will have to get it re-engraved though (she also mentioned that a ring she gave me before with yellow "conflict free" diamonds would look really nice with it as an engagement ring, but my SO has got to buy me jewelry! So he's buying me a goddam engagement ring for goodness sake! He's no getting out of this one! )

[mllebamako]

I think I would wear it. Especially since you feel like your parents had a happy marriage and an amicable divorce. It would be a nice way to honor both of your parents too

[Reglisse]

I absolutely would! It's not like the ring was the cause of the divorce... The ring is still a symbol of the love they had for each other

[blankita719]

I think it's a lovely idea to wear your mother's ring I wouldn't think it was cursed at all! It's the symbol of the love they had which created you.

[Zephii]

I don't think it's bad luck, from the sounds of it they had a good marriage. Why is only marriage that ends in death deemed successful? But if you're really worried, you could cleanse the energies out of it <-- said like a true hippy.

[13000km]

It's the symbol of the love they had which created you.

I like this. (: I don't think the ring is cursed. I bought my dress from a girl whose engagement didn't work out. Don't think that will have any impact on my relationship, same for the ring.

[notyourexgirlfriend]

It's the symbol of the love they had which created you.

This.. so very much THIS

[Yaaamiii]

I can see where people would think it's "bad luck" or whatever, xD but I dunno. I feel like maybe I'd have an iffy feeling about it without really being able to explain why, especially because I'm not really superstitious. But hey, having that ring could save some money. xD

[Dziubka]

I'm not superstitious at all, but... it probably wouldn't feel right for me. I don't think I would wear it.
Good thing my parents didn't have wedding rings to begin with.

*edit: I gave it some more thought and I guess I can put my finger on it now: It would always remind me that divorce can happen, even if you were happy together. I know that theoretically, but it's not something I would want to come to my mind when I look at my wedding ring and I just couldn't not think about it knowing the history of the ring.

But that's just me. From what you write it's a beautiful ring and you're comfortable with it, so go for it

I don't think it's bad luck, from the sounds of it they had a good marriage. Why is only marriage that ends in death deemed successful?

Because that's what you promise each other when you get married (I think?) and it's what marriage is supposed to be about. I'm not saying that a marriage the ends in divorce needs to be overall horrrible. My parents had a good marriage until they separated, so it's not like their whole marriage was a failure... but in the end it still didn't work out. If I had super good grades in my first year, but then dropped out of unversity, I still wouldn't have a degree. Something can be good and still not successful I guess.

Ending in death doesn't automatically make your marriage successful. I suspect that there are a lot of couples who live unhappily ever after and don't divorce. Still the point of marriage is until death do us apart, so a good marriage that ends in divorce wasn't successful.
(I hope I made at least some sense).

[Tanja]

I think it will only have an impact of your marriage if you let it. It's all in your head really. It's just a ring, it doesn't have superpowers

The great thing about it too is that you can create your own meaning to it. I really loved what Krista said about the ring being a symbol of your parents love which created you. When you get married it can still be that AND a symbol for your love for your SO. I would definitely wear it

[Haley53]

I don't think it's bad luck, from the sounds of it they had a good marriage. Why is only marriage that ends in death deemed successful? But if you're really worried, you could cleanse the energies out of it <-- said like a true hippy.

I agree with this! And it's probably what I would do.

[Michia]

I'm not superstitious at all, so yes...if there was a ring that was special to me for sentimental reasons, I would use it. Marriage isn't the rings on your finger - they are only a symbol - it's up to you to decide what those rings mean.

[lucybelle]

But if you're really worried, you could cleanse the energies out of it <-- said like a true hippy.

I don't think I'm that worried about it

I guess the thing is, for me it's just a ring. I guess it's more special because it was my mom's, but really I don't even think of it like that. I just think it's so pretty and I've never seen anything like it before. I mean on my first post I tried to google a picture to find a ring that looked like it, and I couldn't find a single one that even resembled it. It's so unique and pretty and I'm really siked she remembered that I wanted it! I have to get it resized bigger so I hope that doesn't affect the design too much.

Found one! It's very similar to this except in yellow gold, and the roses are pink and the leaves are green.

[WykkedIsis]

If you have any lingering worry, there is a very simple way you can cleanse the ring. Just add a HUGE amount of sea-salt to a cup of spring-water (bottled water) and drop the ring in. Let it sit overnight, if you can in the light of a full moon. Take it to get it professionally cleaned. I think almost any jeweler will do it (sometimes for free).

Good luck!! And congratulations! <3

[dukes2011]

I think it will only have an impact of your marriage if you let it. It's all in your head really. It's just a ring, it doesn't have superpowers

Loved this part of your post Tanja and agree with it 100%. I think wearing your mother's ring is a great way to honor your family. Don't know if I said it or not, but congrats lucybelle!