Would you...

[blankita719]

I'm a no on this one. I planned a wedding before and didn't keep a thing from the prior planning. It was sold or given away instead. The SO and I are such a different couple from what my ex and I were, the items just don't work for us. And I wouldn't want to use anything for fear of bad memories.

[kayla_622]

If I was on a very tight budget, yes. But then again if I was on that tight of a budget I would just get married in the court house and use what money I do have on a honeymoon. I also wouldn't feel very comfortable receiving somebody else's ring or wedding dress (unless the dress was from my grandmother or my mother). Everything else seems okay to reuse.

[Hollandia]

I agree they are just things and a budget matters, but.............I think I would rather him sell a ring he gave to someone else and take the loss of a new one for me. I don't need an expensive ring. I have been married twice before. Once was a cute little wedding chapel JOP in Maryland and the other was the whole nine yards in a big church with 6 brides maids and groomsmen. I would have no issue using any of the decor or anything else if I had anything left over. I still have all my former rings but won't "hand it down" because I heard it was bad luck to do that with rings from broken marriages. I would not want to use the same dress either because of the memories. I have been seriously thinking about selling all my old rings, but somehow can never get myself to do it. I guess, things or not, they hold some kind of sentiment to the past marriages I had.

I tend to create themes for any parties I do, weddings included, so I would most likely not be able to fit any previous items into my next theme. I already have it picked out. All this being said if push came to shove and it was the only way I could have my wedding, I would bite the bullet and use anything that was needed, except the ring. I would sell my old ones myself before I wore a constant reminder of his former love on my finger for the rest of my life.

[Bluejay Belle]

My mother and I were just discussing this.

If I were a man, and had a family heirloom as an engagement ring, even if another woman had worn it - I'd still use it. As a woman, I'd still accept it. If I had an engagement ring (not heirloom) and another woman had worn it, I would not reuse it. As a woman, personally, I don't want a diamond ring, I'd much prefer another gem, so this will doubtfully ever be a problem.

Champagne flutes - reuse unless other names are engraved etc.

Dress, decorations, etc - this depends on the setting of the first planned wedding and the next. I mean, if the first was meant to be a Catholic mass and the second was going to be on a beach (yikes, I want neither LOL) I certainly wouldn't be using the same things!

I just want my wedding to be a fun party, celebrating a personal step in the relationship of my now husband and I. Decorations aren't a super important part to me.

[differentcountries]

I gave away the dress I wore for my first wedding, I did not want it anymore. I kept the shoes for a time, but they don't fit anymore so I thew them. For the wedding to my husband, I bought a new dress and shoes, the dress was in a different colour (I married in red). We got new rings as well. If I find the old ring from my ex (my attic is a bit messy), I intend to sell it for the gold value, or I should throw it into the sea, it feels odd to keep it. We had the wedding in a different city, in part because I did not want the old and the new memories to go together. We had the party (in our city) in another venue and structured it differently. I wanted the feel of my new wedding to be different, and I was very happy that it was.

I actually have the phrames for my old wedding pictures, they were quite enspensive and it seemed wrong to throw them away, I intend to put picture of me and my husband in them, but my husband keeps destroying the plans as he is never satisfied with pictures. Perhaps one day we will do it. The picture we have up now, is in a new frame.

I suppose I will not marry again formally, but if I do have a social ceremony, I don't want to to any of the same things because I want each person to be special.

[Hollandia]

My mother and I were just discussing this.

If I were a man, and had a family heirloom as an engagement ring, even if another woman had worn it - I'd still use it. As a woman, I'd still accept it. If I had an engagement ring (not heirloom) and another woman had worn it, I would not reuse it. As a woman, personally, I don't want a diamond ring, I'd much prefer another gem, so this will doubtfully ever be a problem.

Champagne flutes - reuse unless other names are engraved etc.

Dress, decorations, etc - this depends on the setting of the first planned wedding and the next. I mean, if the first was meant to be a Catholic mass and the second was going to be on a beach (yikes, I want neither LOL) I certainly wouldn't be using the same things!

I just want my wedding to be a fun party, celebrating a personal step in the relationship of my now husband and I. Decorations aren't a super important part to me.

Good point, the heirloom ring would be an exception for me too. It is not like he picked that ring out for some other woman, he loves the women he picks enough to put it on because it has that special value to him. Also a good point about the engraving and that would knock out most of my stuff, I had the napkins, glasses blah blah all personalized. The cake topper was thrown away after the cake top party on the first anniversary. Who the heck made that idea up anyway, it was the foulest cake ever to eat after being frozen for a year and thawed.

I also think each wedding is different so reusing some stuff is fine as long as it does not fell like a repeat wedding of a previous marriage. That would not feel special to me. The dress I wore at last one is way too ornate but tbh, I think it would be a bit of a spit in the face to my Ex if I wore that dress to marry my SO. We are still friends so I would never want to do that to him.

[elina]

The same rings? Never in a million years. Venues, dresses and such? No chance. Like someone else said earlier, I put a lot of sentimental value in things and if something belonged to my or his ex, I wouldn't want to go near it. Thankfully neither of us got that far in our previous relationships.

Just to point it out, I completely get how some people are fine with it. This is just my personal opinion

[whatruckus]

I agree with Hollandia and BlueJay, if it was a family heirloom I would totally be open to that. I think I would feel honored, but like I said before, if it was something he gave his ex or my ex gave me (lol, which is nothing), then no. I would never.

[lilspitfire]

Not a ring. A dress if I altered it, but not a ring. Unless it was a family ring and he got it back from her, but I'd still want it altered in some way which then it would destroy the heirloom. It sounds kind of selfish, but I cannot make myself want to wear something SHE wore on her finger after what she did to him. No thank you.