SO isn't a big phone user.

[sarahbear]

So my SO isn't much of a phone person. We text daily, although short, spread out texts that usually go something like:
"hi baby"
"hi whats up"
"hanging out. you?"
"same. I miss you."
"I miss you too"

or something like that. Which is fine, I don't need to be talking to him 24/7 because then it gives us something to talk about on skype (which we do every few days). I just catch myself feeling kind of bitchy, for a lack of a better word, when he takes a long time to respond to a text or not respond at all. I know I'm probably just over-thinking everything. Does anyone else feel like this? I just feel like in a LDR, communication is vital and I want to find ways to improve it. How do you communicate with your SO? Do you set a schedule? Text/call frequently?

[NaNi]

My SO and I don't really talk often. Usually once a week. I can't remember the last time we had a long talk. It's been a few weeks. We also don't really text. We do send daily emails, though.

[Lyric]

We text throughout the day and talk for at least an hour on the phone... and we throw in a skype once in awhile (It's been awhile since we have skyped, though... I think it makes it harder on her to actually see me rather than talk on the phone. But my kids really like seeing her, so I try to suggest it once in awhile)

Many times our conversations are just random chit chat, sometimes we run out of stuff to talk about and exchange texts like yours. I think that's normal.

[13000km]

LD was hard for my boyfriend at the beginning. 1. he didn't like people hearing him talk over the computer, and I didn't like being on video. 2. He didn't like texting; didn't really know what to say/how to respond a lot of times. 3. We thought we were limited to skype/IM as free ways of communicating internationally.

So we IM-ed a lot, until that wasn't enough for either of us. We got used to being on skype (but only with each other, strangely), found ways to call/text each other for free without smartphones (felt like geniuses), and adjusted our conversation style so we could talk about more things for longer periods of time.

Talking, for him, still doesn't come naturally, but he tries. If he didn't have more than a one word response to my texts, he'd add "I saw a bird slip on ice...", or "I was thinking about lego...", and other random stuff along those lines. Describing something in detail usually helps the flow of conversation a little bit for us. If given the opportunity, skype often, so conversations aren't always present, but is never forced. It starts to feel more like you're in the same room as your SO minus the physical contact. There were only certain pockets of time in the day we could skype due to the time difference, but it ended up working out to basically a daily thing, the exception being when I hung out with friends too late.

Give yourself time to get into a comfortable rhythm, make a conscious effort to expand on conversation topics when possible. Good luck. (:

[efish1042]

We text every day, but some days more than others. Sometimes we end up having a conversation and some days we get so busy we just text goodnight.
My SO hates talking on the phone and doesn't like texting that much more. I call him every now and then, maybe once or twice a week, we text every day, and sometimes I ask him to get on skype. I find it much easier to converse with him on skype because he is much more likely to pay attention to the conversation without getting distracted. Neither of us had webcams tho (I got one for xmas), so it's mostly instant messaging.
We, understandably, have some issues with communication sometimes. I am at least grateful that he is willing to put aside his dislike for communication technology for me. It means a lot and we always find a way to work things out.

[HollzHeartsChris]

My old SO and I still text each other everyday, which I love! Lately we've been spoiled and we've had loads of time to Skype, text and just chat in general. We went through this stage where we hardly ever texted each other (though there was a good reason for that ) although now we try to chat to each other whenever we can. Sometimes conversations are a little short, mainly because we've been having a lot of time to talk to one another lately, but it's natural I think when you're in touch so often.

[ushiwakafox]

My SO is similar - he really isn't crazy about talking on the phone. He's fine with texting and IMing though. Even when we're CD, we text a lot. When I was away for 2 years, he did put in the effort to at least webcam with me. He's also not a pro at communication, but the effort meant a lot to me.
Now that we only deal with LD a few months out of the year, we don't webcam, and we only talk on the phone to say goodnight.
At the moment I am visiting family so we're LD right now, but even now he doesn't seem too interested in talking on the phone. I understand the bitchy part though, trust me. It's just how he is, but be appreciative that he puts any effort at all lol. I'd say just switch things up now and again, don't talk too many days in a row using the same thing. Like every few days, switch to IMing instead of texting just to refresh the atmosphere lol.

[Jade_Crystal]

My ex was like that... I know that it entirely depends on the person for sure, but in my strictly speaking personal case he was simply not that careful and considerate with me although when we were just friends he was at the very least not taking long to reply. I guess he considered texting with me a chore and that kinda made things less interesting for him. Guess that was one of many reasons he is my ex now. XD If he's not like that when you use voice or talk face to face then he's probably cool with you tho. :3

[alizee]

I can totally understand you sarahbear!!!! My LDR communication is kind of similar to yours and most of the times I get nervous about it (sometimes I feel that he calls me because HE HAS TO, and not because he wants to ...). But I say to myself that MEN are different from women (who have more emotional needs!!!) and I also say that I AM NOT GOING TO LET MYSELF BEING RULED BY MY FEARS/ ANXIETY/ CRAZINESS/ NEGATIVITY. I never said anything to him about it, I am always showing myself, when talking to him, calm, peaceful, optimistic, happy and funny, but everytime we hang up the phone I just feel sad because I wanted us to talk more
My boyfriend and I talk every 2-4 days on the phone for about 10-20 min. I feel he*s not much of a phone talker also. As for the texts, it*s mostly me who sends them but he always responds back nicely. I am a little frustrated about that (but I never told him!), because I need more communication and it feels so good talking to him. But I am trying to calm myself, telling myself that he is a busy person (works often extra hours) and he gets home very tired and falls asleep easily. He asked me 2 times to come and visit him, but I said it was to early and needed to know him better. Now, we are planning on meeting in September, as he comes home (we have the same hometown) form his work vacation. We*ll just see how the communication in person will go ... and I believe it will get much better, because it*s different in person.

[Jaac]

I feel the same way!
It's only been 2 weeks sinds i've last seen him, so I'm still trying to getting used to not being around him all day anymore.
He's been working out much lately and he's running around all the time and that doesnt really give him a lot of time to send me messages or check his Phone. While my Phone is on my side all the time!
Eventhough I know that, I still get annoyed when he's not responded to my message after 2 hours.
I also feel like I'm the one who Always sends the first message. And then I still feel like I'm bothering him.
While he says that ofcourse i'm not bothering him!
I also try to remind myself that he probably doesn't even notice that he's doing it and that I'm bothered by it.
I don't wanna say too much about it to him, cause i'm scared that it'll come across as pushing him to talk to me more.

I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling this way...
I think the trick is not to think too much about it and wait for him to send something first, or wait for him to
continue the conversation or ask questions. How annoying it may be when he's not doing/saying or asking the things you would like him to...

[alizee]

I feel the same way!
It's only been 2 weeks sinds i've last seen him, so I'm still trying to getting used to not being around him all day anymore.
He's been working out much lately and he's running around all the time and that doesnt really give him a lot of time to send me messages or check his Phone. While my Phone is on my side all the time!
Eventhough I know that, I still get annoyed when he's not responded to my message after 2 hours.
I also feel like I'm the one who Always sends the first message. And then I still feel like I'm bothering him.
While he says that ofcourse i'm not bothering him!
I also try to remind myself that he probably doesn't even notice that he's doing it and that I'm bothered by it.
I don't wanna say too much about it to him, cause i'm scared that it'll come across as pushing him to talk to me more.

I'm glad I'm not the only one feeling this way...
I think the trick is not to think too much about it and wait for him to send something first, or wait for him to
continue the conversation or ask questions. How annoying it may be when he's not doing/saying or asking the things you would like him to...

It seems to be the same pattern as my boyfriend ... and now, as we had out our first face to face meeting things seem to be as they were before, but a week later he still hasn*t said anything about a future meeting ...

[zendaya]

i have this same feeling with my SO and it is frustrating, and i get what you mean by MEN totally different from women. im a chatter and he's not. i like to talk about my day with him everyday. and yes its always me who does the first move on texting or calling. he said he will only call when its important, and not because he wants to. i dont know if that is really a guy thing. we have yet to see each other in 6 months, i hope we could still work this out .

[differentcountries]

I don't think men and women are neccesarily that different. We always Skype (or phone if net is down) in the evening or else he gets really frustrated. Even if for only 2 min it is nice to see the other person and hear their voice. The only time we skipped our evening Skype session he did so poorly at work his boss asked if he was sick LOL but he was only missing me. So we made a promise to always be in daily contact. Some days we text a lot, other times very little depending on if we are busy. I don't think of it if I text him and he takes a while to answer, I just assume he is doing something. Like me he can't really focus on studies unless he takes a phone break. When he works, busy times means busy, if he can he will be in touch.

[Blege]

It kind of is the same with my SO, we talk on skype twice per week for about 1-2 hours and I really love that, but apart from this he barely texts (via the Korean Whatsapp). We saw each other two weeks ago and since then I'm just constantly nervous about him not replying, or replying very late. I tried to talk about it on skype during our last two conversations, and tried to make him understand how it bothers me and that I get nervous about it. He apologized and said he would try to write more often, that it's not on purpose and that he just gets easily distracted. He even installed an alarm in his cell phone for the evening in order to remind him to write me.

I'm kind of worried that I nag to much about it and pressure him too much. Probably I should stop that, but it's soooo hard.

[TaraMarie]

So apparently we are all the same! In the beginning I felt like I was nagging him all the time. He HATES talking on the phone. I won't call him, he has to call me. And I told him I won't have text conversations when both of us are near a phone/iPad so we can actually talk. I will respond to his texts though. When we aren't in touch, or I don't respond to his texts Then he realized he misses me too much....so we FaceTime every night and he calls me every morning when he is driving to work! Mission accomplished!