First time visiting and sex???

[emsimes]

Just to add to what everyone else said:
You are an adult and shouldn't feel pressured by your mom, no matter how close you two are. A few months into my relationship with my SO, my mom asked us if we were having sex. I told her that although I love her, it's none of her damn business what we're doing. Personally, unless you're underage, I dont think parents have any right to know about their childrens' sex lives.

Good luck, and I hope you do what ultimately makes you happy

[differentcountries]

If you don't want people to know when you start having sexwith him, then meet early, have a meal, have sex, snuggle and go back to your family to spend the night. I did something like that when I stayed in a shared hotel room on the holiday where I met SO. Tell your diary, not your family! If you do want to talk about your sex life with mum you can do it on your own terms later on.

[Kapwned]

It seems to be quite common for people to sleep with their SO rather soon after meeting their SO in person for the first time. Don't think of it as meeting a stranger and having sex with them. You know your partner, hopefully you've talked about sex, and have established your likes and dislikes and what you want and don't want. That's all you need to do to have safe sex, even if it's just a one time encounter with a stranger.

Do what feels right. A lot of couples have a lot of built up urges and desires that they've had to hold in for as long as they've been apart. They deserve to express it.

I admit with my SO we had sex rather soon after meeting. I couldn't have been at his place for more than half an hour. We walked in, he escorted me to his room to put me stuff down, he expressed interest in cuddling, so we did, and yeah.

[MochaLatte]

Everyone's advice and words were much appreciated.

From what everyone has said I've come to the conclusion that my life is my life. If my family is upset with that then that's their "problem". And I mean no disrespect but me sleeping with my SO doesn't affect them in any way so technically they shouldn't care. I'm an adult and conduct myself in such a manner. I'm only going to be in town for a week so I want to spend as much time with him as possible. So spending the night is what I want to do. If they have something to say about it then go ahead but it won't change how I feel. They'll have to just understand that.

A lot of people still view online romances as not "real" romances. And that bothers me. Just the other day my friend was telling me "you don't know him, how can you want to have sex with him?" And I said "I do know him, I know his name, where he works, his favorite color, about his past, ect what do you mean I don't know him." And he said "you haven't met him, so you don't know him." Meeting him isn't going spontaneously tell me new information about him. He's still the same person just "in person". It's these kinds of mindsets that bother me. Especially when they're coming from people that are suppose to care about you. Like, open your eyes and stop being so closed minded.

[Kapwned]

You're a grown young women, you're well past an appropriate age to be having sex. It's a normal part of relationships, so yeah, your family should not be giving you grief for that.

I personally do not like to think of LDRs as "online relationships", because there is a lot of stigma attached to those who met online and when we allow people to refer to our relationships as online relationships it makes me feel like they're devaluing it. It's a relationship that is currently long distance and you happen to use the internet as a means of regular contact. When people say internet boyfriend/girlfriend it makes me feel like they think it'll never leave the internet. That it's just some fling between two hermits who will never make any effort to have a normal relationship. People have no problem with military couples, but the second they hear you met online, you can feel them judging you. Next time someone tries to put their two cents in, remind them that it is your relationship, not theirs. Also, there is more to getting to know a person than being there in person and having physical contact. In fact, I feel like long distance couples come to know each other better because our time together consists heavily of conversation.

[farandaway]

After 10months knowing online we had been through so much and we knew we loved each other. We knew what will happen when we meet. We imagined how it would be but it was better. It felt good and natural to be kissing and hugging all the way from when he picked me up and to the hotel and so forth... very memorable still after 2+ years.

[whatruckus]

Everyone's advice and words were much appreciated.

From what everyone has said I've come to the conclusion that my life is my life. If my family is upset with that then that's their "problem". And I mean no disrespect but me sleeping with my SO doesn't affect them in any way so technically they shouldn't care. I'm an adult and conduct myself in such a manner. I'm only going to be in town for a week so I want to spend as much time with him as possible. So spending the night is what I want to do. If they have something to say about it then go ahead but it won't change how I feel. They'll have to just understand that.

A lot of people still view online romances as not "real" romances. And that bothers me. Just the other day my friend was telling me "you don't know him, how can you want to have sex with him?" And I said "I do know him, I know his name, where he works, his favorite color, about his past, ect what do you mean I don't know him." And he said "you haven't met him, so you don't know him." Meeting him isn't going spontaneously tell me new information about him. He's still the same person just "in person". It's these kinds of mindsets that bother me. Especially when they're coming from people that are suppose to care about you. Like, open your eyes and stop being so closed minded.

Lol, no offense, but your friend is kind of a dolt. You can even meet someone, "known" them for years, and still come to find out that you really don't know anything about them.

[MrHunnyB]

I met my SO in person 6 months after we met online and yea I had sex with him the first night I was there. It was very romantic and it felt right. If it feels right for you then go for it. Don't worry what other say or judge. It simply is non of their business. You live your own life. You don't live a fake life to please other people.

[Ahava]

We kinda agreed before hand that we wouldn't have sex on our first meeting, but then things changed. I think it was the third night we finally sealed the deal.
Would have happened on the second night but he didn't have condoms, coz he wasn't planning on sleeping with me the first meeting.
We were a little "slow" as he is shy and doesn't throw himself on women, so we only had our first proper kiss the second evening.
But we did sleep next to each other from the first night onwards. Whether or not we have sex I always want to sleep next to him in the same bed.