2nd visit ahead, but where to go to?

[delitonik]

SO and I are planning second visit and we just hit a wall and we don't know what to do.

Plans are obviously spending time together but the question is where?
He lives in South Carolina, so the obvious would be to go there, but all his family lives up in Virginia. He wants me to know the town he lives atn and he also wants for me to meet his family and get to see his hometown. We had already agreed on going to Virginia first and then on a second visit to go to SC however we are starting to hesitate on that. Today I was talking to my mom and even when I have hers and all my family support, she is still concerned about me going to VA instead of SC. I am not very easily persuaded on changing my mind but maybe she does have a point. She has been mentioning that it would be good for me to see where and how he lives, who he relates on the daily life and see his everyday routine because wether I like it or not his family live 7 hours from where he is at and they are not on his every day life. My mom is kind of a paraoid and she was mentioning something about things that he could be hiding... Obviously I know there isn't anything like that and I trust him completely, but I understand where she comes from, even if I don't like it sometimes you need to see things for yourself to be at ease right and besides she is an oldschool mom and its her job to be concerned about those stuff, right ? Specially when it is the first times to visit and get a little bit on insight on the daily life. So now the doubt is right there... where to go to?

I still have time to figure it out, but here is where you guys come into place... any suggestions?

[lahexi]

Personally, I would want to visit South Carolina and be shown all around the city he lives in. That way you can be familiar with it, and know what the places he spends his time at all look like. His favorite cafes, a local park, etc. Meeting family is great, but can be very overwhelming, especially if it's your first time being introduced to them.

It completely depends on how long your stay will be, but maybe you can take a road trip up to Virginia for a weekend? That way you can spend most of your time with him in SC, but also have a bit of an introduction to the family.

[MissingMyDutchLove]

I would agree with that! You get a totally different vibe when you're meeting someone's whole family vs. just them in their day to day life. I would rather be with my SO alone for a while before being thrown into the whole family thing. Of course it's totally up to you, but maybe you could postpone the VA trip until another visit?

[differentcountries]

I would go see his home town and friends there, and on the next visit go see his family. Get to know him a little better in his surroundings first.

I met SOs family (who lives a day's travel from his work town) on my 3rd visit to him. It was very overwealming to meet his family, and everything went wrong on my trip, I got my luggage less than a day before I went home... Then it really helped that I had taken time to really know him first, and he was able to help me through it because he knew me, too. BTW before I went there, we Skyped a lot when he was there visiting by himself, and he took a lot of Viber pics etc. I also talked to some of his relatives on Skype before I went. That helped me to ease into the place and people before I got there.

[delitonik]

Thanks all for your advice. I talked to him last night and told him that I am flying to South Carolina. I explained to him the reasons why and he agreed on it. He told me that the reason why he wanted me to meet his family is because he already knows mine and I explained to him that that was just because of the way my everyday life is. I live with my mom and daughter and I am very close to my dad and brother, so when he came we all gathered and spend time. He said that he felt really happy when he was able to meet everyone and that he never felt out of place or anything so he wanted for me to have the same experience but he understood now that our daily lives are different. So its settled, I am going to South Carolina for a week.