Being a foreigner

[Kiara]

@Dziubka: You post made me smile, but I understand your feeling of being bored of having to talk always about that topic. Hopefully people who already know you, like your SO's firends, accept that and go on with normal conversations!
Also, your words very rassured be about the fact of being a foreigner in Germany. But as popped up in several posts here, language is a big issue to get accepted, reducing the accent then it's a plus!

[lucybelle]

It's not the topic of this thread (or maybe it is in a way), but that's not necessarily true.

It depends on your personal abilities and a bunch of other things as well, but it's not that hard to adapt a different accent.
You can actually learn to speak a foreign language without an accent (or at least to a point where people won't hear you're a foreigner anymore), even when you started learning it as an adult.

Something that bothers me about my SO is how he's always trying to correct my pronunciation. I know he's trying to help, but I have a bad gringo accent. I try as hard as I can. But him saying the word "Uruca" over and over again, isn't going to make my accent go away! Also, when I ask him how to get to places or what to tell the taxi driver (no street names here so you say "on the highway near the Club Cubano" or whatever) he has me constantly repeat it. He treats me like a baby and it drives me mad. He'll say "you need to say _______, now say it" NO! I know how to speak Spanish, I know how to talk to a taxi driver, and if he doesn't understand me the first time, he'll ask me to repeat it. Done.

[digitalfever]

It's not the topic of this thread (or maybe it is in a way), but that's not necessarily true.

It depends on your personal abilities and a bunch of other things as well, but it's not that hard to adapt a different accent.
You can actually learn to speak a foreign language without an accent (or at least to a point where people won't hear you're a foreigner anymore), even when you started learning it as an adult.

I think it's going to be hard since movement from one English country to another isn't really learning a new language. While it's possible I'd say the majority once they've reached adulthood don't loose their accent. Obviously this is anecdotal evidence but from experience with my family and as they've slowly immigrated over...

[Engel]

It's not the topic of this thread (or maybe it is in a way), but that's not necessarily true.

It depends on your personal abilities and a bunch of other things as well, but it's not that hard to adapt a different accent.
You can actually learn to speak a foreign language without an accent (or at least to a point where people won't hear you're a foreigner anymore), even when you started learning it as an adult.

true. one day i was in the tram, when i just arrived in germany, and heard a girl speaking prtuguese to a friend while her boyfriend was speaking german with someone else. i needed an information so i asked her in portuguese, and she answered in portuguese as well. i asked what part of brazil she was from and she told me she is german. but lived in brazil for 2 years! NO ACCENT AT ALL. the brazilian was her boyfriend. so yes, you can learn to speak as a native, and be mistaken for one. it is possible, but clearly not for everybody.

[lucybelle]

true. one day i was in the tram, when i just arrived in germany, and heard a girl speaking prtuguese to a friend while her boyfriend was speaking german with someone else. i needed an information so i asked her in portuguese, and she answered in portuguese as well. i asked what part of brazil she was from and she told me she is german. but lived in brazil for 2 years! NO ACCENT AT ALL. the brazilian was her boyfriend. so yes, you can learn to speak as a native, and be mistaken for one. it is possible, but clearly not for everybody.

I want that to be my super power I have a feeling I'm going to sound gringa for the rest of my life.

[Dziubka]

Kiara, you're going to live in Berlin. There's schools there with 90% foreigners. There's nothing to worry about, really.
If you learn some everyday-small-talk German, you'll be absolutely fine

Lucybelle, that's not so bad, though.

I have a feeling I've told this already, but the night I met my boyfriend he was at the concert with his best friend.
Later when we met again, this friend, trying to pay me a compliment, said:
"When I met you, I didn't even think you were German - I thought you were drunk!"
For some time I must have had such a weird pronounciation/accent that people regularly thought I was disabled in a way.

My boyfriend never corrects me, unless I make an obvious mistake. There's some words we practise together, because I can't get them right for the hell of it, but that's it. I always ask him silly things about what to say in certain situations, though and it drives him up the walls

When I first lived in Poland, in the very beginning, I couldn't speak a word of Polish, so I usually communicated with everyone in English. Sometimes when I think about it now, it's funny, because my friends and I were always quite the curiosity in public and people could tell at first glance (or rather sound) that we were different. Now, that it's not so obvious anymore, it sometimes creates odd situations.
My boyfriend and I ended up on a demonstration some time ago and there were tv people asking for an interview, which we couldn't give because we didn't really know what was going on, so they asked the guy next to us, who went in a raging fit about how he knows that the tv channel was German owned (complete b/s) and how he doesn't give interviews to German television. It made me really uncomfortable.

[flugelhorn]

This was one thing I hated about being in Canada. It's not being foreign that bothered me so much as being an immigrant. People don't mind so much if they think you're a tourist, but when you live there it seems like different rules apply. Some people are so rude!
I'm ok there until I open my mouth, and then it's all over. Even if I'm sooo careful not to use my slang or any phrases I know are Australian, my accent gives me away.

I'm really sorry to hear that. Can I ask where in Canada you were living? I live in Toronto & I like to think we're quite inviting to foreigners - after all, 51% of Torontonians were born outside of Canada! But I suppose there is a lot I don't see as I am a white girl who was raised in Canada her whole life.
I also find it sad people would react that way to immigrants - don't they know Canada was built on immigration??

When I was living in the UK my blood used to boil when I got asked 'where in the USA are you from?' NOT because they thought I was an American but because they simply assumed they knew where I was from. In Toronto I would never, ever, EVER assume I know someone's background - especially since some (possibly most) people are more than one culture or nationality!
I know what you mean about how you get treated as an immigrant (even though I was only on a student visitor visa). I had a flatmate who picked on my Canadian English constantly.

[lucybelle]

When I was living in the UK my blood used to boil when I got asked 'where in the USA are you from?' NOT because they thought I was an American but because they simply assumed they knew where I was from. In Toronto I would never, ever, EVER assume I know someone's background - especially since some (possibly most) people are more than one culture or nationality!

I know everyone has their pet peeves, but I just don't get this one. I used to do this all the time "So are you from England?" and don't let it be someone from Australia who will FLIP THEIR SHIT on me (even worse with New Zealand/OZ). Accents are similar, and especially similar between Canada and USA. This one woman I met here has the Frenchiest accent ever, and is German. And honestly, here, USA and Canada are lumped into one group-- "North Americans". I think you need to pick your battles, and to get upset over someone trying to start a conversation with you is just a waste of time, in my opinion.

[Engel]

I want that to be my super power I have a feeling I'm going to sound gringa for the rest of my life.

I want what she is having! ^

[flugelhorn]

I know everyone has their pet peeves, but I just don't get this one. I used to do this all the time "So are you from England?" and don't let it be someone from Australia who will FLIP THEIR SHIT on me (even worse with New Zealand/OZ). Accents are similar, and especially similar between Canada and USA. This one woman I met here has the Frenchiest accent ever, and is German. And honestly, here, USA and Canada are lumped into one group-- "North Americans". I think you need to pick your battles, and to get upset over someone trying to start a conversation with you is just a waste of time, in my opinion.

It would never turn into an argument in my case, I would just kind of say something like "I'm from North of America..." & then their faces would kind of light up when they found out I was from Canada. & 90% of Britons would tell me how they'd love to visit someday, which is always nice to hear.

I think people are just proud of where they come from & if you grow up in that place you have a hard time understanding how people can get your accent mixed up with someone else's. As a Canadian I can hear an American accent instantly but I can see how someone from outside those countries would have a hard time with it. After living in the UK for 6 months I got good at distinguishing English from Scottish/ Irish/ Australian but then I heard a New Zealander & I was totally thrown off.

I think it's just polite to simply ask, instead of assume. I mean, I would never assume anything else about a person...? "Oh, you're American so you must love Mexican food" for example. When I was traveling I met a woman who had an Indian accent but didn't look Indian at all! Turns out she was Swedish but had been living in India for 2 years.

[Off2Spain]

I love this thread! Although I'm not yet living in Spain, i've been there numerous times and I find that I really do not blend in at all. I'm from the netherlands and i'm a redhead with quite pale skin. Maybe I'm imagining it but where my SO lives, which is where I will be living soon, there are really not that many tourists and I feel looked at on the streets and the busses. Many times when I'm walking on the streets by myself, guys sometimes yell sexist things at me. Although that sometimes happens, I find that the spanish are very kind to me. Especially when they find out I took the effort to learn to speak Spanish fluently (you find that generally the Spanish are terrible English speakers). I really do hope though that I will be taken seriously when I'm actually living there. I've come to terms with the fact that no matter if I learn to speak spanish like a native I will always be the foreigner due to my looks.

About learning to speak a language like a native, I really believe it's possible. But it helps a lot when you're used to learning new languages anyway. As I'm from the Netherlands (we're a very small country surrounded by the rest of Europe) I've had to learn (besides dutch) English, French, German and Spanish at school. When you're a native English speaker its less likely that you've had to learn new languages so it might take a bit more effort but defenitely possible!

[Tooki]

When I was living in the UK my blood used to boil when I got asked 'where in the USA are you from?' NOT because they thought I was an American but because they simply assumed they knew where I was from. In Toronto I would never, ever, EVER assume I know someone's background - especially since some (possibly most) people are more than one culture or nationality!
I know what you mean about how you get treated as an immigrant (even though I was only on a student visitor visa). I had a flatmate who picked on my Canadian English constantly.

I don't understand it either. I'm an Australian and I can tell you right now that someone from Vancouver and Seattle sound almost the same. So I can definitely understand why someone would assume you are American. But I get your point. It is just that we hear & see Americans all the time, so it is a common assumption.

I have it easy when I go to Estonia in that I'm obviously a foreigner. The younger people speak good English so I get by pretty easily. I need to speak slow though because they sometimes have problems with my accent.

[milaya]

I had no idea about this thread even though a quote of mine started it. I feel honored XD

Okay, so like I said in the quote, even if I live in Japan for 30 years and speak flawless Japanese, people on the street might as well see me as a foreigner who just got of the flight. I'm sure this will bring me some annoyance in the future.
I study Japan studies at a major at university, where I study Japanese language, culture, history and etc. Meaning I do have a good knowledge about Japan, both language-wise and even about politics, social systems, Japanese media, school system... heck even child rearing, domestic violence and divorce rate - but, because I was born somewhere else and because I have brown hair and big green eyes I will always be the foreigner "who does not understand Japan".
And to be fully honest, I'm sure it will eat me away slowly in the future and I have to learn how to deal with that.
If it was just language or accent, then I would be able to blend in when I just walk in the crowd, but like some of the others here - for an example the blond girls in hispanic countries - I'll always stick out even when I don't talk.

If the people know me, there is not any problems. My Japanese friends, family-in-law and such, knows I speak Japanese - even without an accent, they know I understand Japanese culture and most also say that I must have been Japanese in a previous life. I even love to eat typical Japanese things most foreigners doesn't like.

My SO and I also need to consider where to live in Japan to give, not just me, but our future children the best chances. I love living in Osaka (the second biggest city) but unfortunately, we've been told that they can be a bit narrow-minded towards people from "outside" (also Japanese from outside Osaka). I don't want my future children to be bullied because they're half Japanese, because they have slightly bigger eyes or a lighter shade of hair than their classmates. I don't want to put them in an international school, like a lot of foreigners do, because I want them to feel like they're "Japanese" like they're a part of the Japanese society just like everyone else. So right now, my SO and I are considering living near Tokyo, the place where they're most used to foreigners. The only problem is that I don't like Tokyo much.

Aaaa... the pain of being a foreigner.