Been forever since I've been on here. I don't know if I'm seeking advice, kind words of encouragement, or just venting, but here's the deal... My SO and I haven't seriously talked about "closing the distance" but, in hoping that this works out the way we both would like it to, that is inevitable. Well, that's had me thinking, it would only make sense that I made the move - he's got the stable job and house while I virtually have nothing tying me down, except for one thing, my horse.
Sigh...this might seem trivial to some but, for me, my horse is my life, my passion and the only constant thing I've ever had. The issue is that the situation I'm currently in allows me the affordability to keep her. The reality is if/when I move, there's no way I'd be able to afford rent, bills AND her. This is the most anxiety ridden decision I have ever been (potentially) faced with.
I've thought about leasing her. She's been leased before, short-term, but it's so difficult to find people in my area where, if horses are your thing, you either already have one or know someone that allows you FREE access to one. Plus, she needs an advanced rider which narrows those possibilities a tad bit more. I just don't know what to do. I realize I may have to be faced with the decision to sell her and that is giving me such conflicted feelings! On the one hand, the devout animal lover in me says "Oh heelllll no! You promised to keep her forever!" but then this other voice chimes in and says "life is full of earth shattering and sometimes heartbreaking decisions." Ugh!! But I don't wanna!!!!!
If that is my only option, the only hope I cling to is that while I know my heart would break in her absence, the joy of actually being with the man I love might help ease that pain....maybe. One could only hope.
Sigh...this might seem trivial to some but, for me, my horse is my life, my passion and the only constant thing I've ever had. The issue is that the situation I'm currently in allows me the affordability to keep her. The reality is if/when I move, there's no way I'd be able to afford rent, bills AND her. This is the most anxiety ridden decision I have ever been (potentially) faced with.
I've thought about leasing her. She's been leased before, short-term, but it's so difficult to find people in my area where, if horses are your thing, you either already have one or know someone that allows you FREE access to one. Plus, she needs an advanced rider which narrows those possibilities a tad bit more. I just don't know what to do. I realize I may have to be faced with the decision to sell her and that is giving me such conflicted feelings! On the one hand, the devout animal lover in me says "Oh heelllll no! You promised to keep her forever!" but then this other voice chimes in and says "life is full of earth shattering and sometimes heartbreaking decisions." Ugh!! But I don't wanna!!!!!
If that is my only option, the only hope I cling to is that while I know my heart would break in her absence, the joy of actually being with the man I love might help ease that pain....maybe. One could only hope.
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