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    He leaves in 10 hours

    You are probably wondering why I am on here then instead of cherishing the last few moments...but its because I am so sick with sadness that I can't do much more than sit here not talking. Besides, some good vibes and support when I get home from dropping him at the airport will do alot to cheer me up through the sobs.

    I am just so torn up about it. I didn't know it would hurt this much, that it could hurt this much. Spent so much time not thinking about this day that now its here I feel blindsided by the pain. He is coming back in 8 months, but that seems an eternity when I was used to 24/7 with him, touching him, kissing him, sleeping next to him. I almost regret sometimes having him visit, since without the visit I sometimes think it would have been easier to be LD. I didn't have a clue what I was missing, and as much as I loved him before I love him 3x as much now. Yet these 2 months were the best of my life. I am just in so much pain, I feel like I am about to say goodbye to my happiness, like I am signing up for 8 months of loneliness. I love him so much, I am 25 and have dated so many men, but he is so much more than they ever were. I love him more than I ever knew I could, and he made my life something I never thought it could be. I was so much happier, so much more laid back while he was here. I worry he will leave and I will go back to my old life of being a hermit, lonely in my apartment and depressed. I can still talk to him everyday on Skype...but now that just seems so cold and distant.

    Overall, this just sucks. I don't want to cry, but maybe I should to get it out? Gah...I am just so much so hurting....it feels so unfair

    #2
    I spent 5 months straight with my SO before he left for 6. It's hard to go from all the time to nothing. I really like the quote 'don't cry because it's over, smile because it happened" I think it relates well, don't dread the next 8 months let the high of the last two amazing months get you through. Its okay to cry, get it out ball like the drunk lady I heard on the street at 3am this morning, just let it all out. Don't miss out on the last few hours with him, make the most of them if you want to cry together then do it! He is in the same situation as you are so if anyone he probably understands the best, don't be afraid to show you are upset, I don't get why so many people are afraid to act like anything other then robots with the people they love.

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      #3
      I spent 3 months with my SO, and it's been almost 2 months since I saw him.
      I cried the whole weekend before he left and a week after.

      It's tough. There's no denying that. But don't stop yourself from feeling. Whether you feel that your heart is hurting, or you feel sad, or lonely, depressed, anxious... whatever it is. Don't hold it back. And its okay to cry. The first day is the hardest. You'll feel it as soon as you get home from the airport. Things will remind you of him. Where he used to sit, where he slept, the bowls he would use, the glass he claimed as his.

      It will be hard to not cry, but its okay. It does get better as each day goes by. It really does. Just have faith that you two are stronger than ever now, and look to each other for support. Talk as often as you can. Keep communication open. Don't doubt yourselves when you've come so far.

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        #4
        I live with my SO. and had to spend 3 months in brazil this year, with him visiting for 11 days. and went back to Germany for 4 months. had to come back to brazil again. he visited for 11 days again...

        and in less than 2 weeks I will be back with him, but everyday hurts. I am used to have him there, everyday, by my side, sleeping with me. being here away from him is hell, even though I love my family, I just feel incomplete.
        Im glad the distance will be over soon for me, forever this time.



        For you, enjoy those last hours as much as you can. I know its hard. but at least you know when you can see each other again!
        our story.

        sigpic

        02.02.2012 - When we got married and closed the distance once and for all

        "If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse."

        Comment


          #5
          I live with my SO. and had to spend 3 months in brazil this year, with him visiting for 11 days. and went back to Germany for 4 months. had to come back to brazil again. he visited for 11 days again...

          and in less than 2 weeks I will be back with him, but everyday hurts. I am used to have him there, everyday, by my side, sleeping with me. being here away from him is hell, even though I love my family, I just feel incomplete.
          Im glad the distance will be over soon for me, forever this time.



          For you, enjoy those last hours as much as you can. I know its hard. but at least you know when you can see each other again!
          our story.

          sigpic

          02.02.2012 - When we got married and closed the distance once and for all

          "If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse."

          Comment


            #6
            Its not fun. It's ok to cry, everything everyone has already said. Something that I find helps me is even after he leaves I write to him, either in my journal or on here, or something along those lines. I know he can't/won't be answering his phone so I don't want to bombard him with messages, but it helps me to "feel" like I'm talking to him and that maybe he isn't so far away in your heart. We're all here for you. I also know it's hard to feel, that sometimes it's easier to just block out the pain, but that isn't always healthy. Do your best to get out and do something, whether it's shopping or going out with friends or something (Maybe not today, but in a week when it's easier to control the tears). I tend to live like a hermit too, but it doesn't help with the pain. I really don't want to go out today and do stuff, I want to sit home and mope, but I think at the end of the day I'll be happier because I did get out and do thing.

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              #7
              I think everybody knows how you're feeling. Goodbyes always hurt. It never gets easier (at least not for me). My SO and I were never so lucky to spend that much time together (the longest being 7 1/2 weeks), but even during those several weeks you just get used to each other. We always spend every day together, so it hurts even more. I always hate going back to limited Skype calls.

              Comment


                #8
                Even a week together is difficult to go back to being alone. Cry - let it out. Come on here and write a blog post, write a thread - add to this one. We get it, we really do.

                Comment


                  #9
                  God this HURTS! I havent stopped crying since I got home, everything is reminding me of him like Zapookie said. Songs (Bon Jovi, we always rocked out to it in the car), his empty Monster can, his plate in the sink. Its awful! Its torture! I mean I expected it to hurt but this is like having my heart ripped to shreds. I just took some sleeping pills to see if sleeping till he lands will help, maybe talking to him will make it less painful? I don't know, all I know is I hate this

                  Comment


                    #10
                    So sorry you're hurting. You're not alone.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Hey, sweetie, another one in a similar sitch; three months CD, and he just left for the other side of the world last week, and I won't see him until June, when I will visit for about ten days (maybe a few more, hopefully no less).
                      So far, I am dealing okay, just keeping busy, but the nighttimes are hard. I expect them to get harder as it goes on. What I am finding helps me enormously, though, is when my thoughts turn to him, when I can't keep my mind from straying to him (because I do try to think about it as little as possible, and it does help a bit) I focus on dreaming of when I'll see him again, and planning and brainstorming ideas for what we'll do. It helps me focus on the excitement of our next meeting, rather than the sadness of his absence in the interim, and it's also helped me to think about how short a time six months really is by using comparisons of how much things have changed for me since that period of time ago; like, six months ago, I was living in a different house, with a cruddy ex-partner I'm well shed of, in a suburb with a terrible bus service and no internet infrastructure, the same job but a lower pay-grade, and little to no freedom to go out by myself. And now, I am living in a much nicer house, in a suburb that got the memo about it being the 21st Century (), I've had a raise, I've since learned beginner's tango, I've met someone amazing who has restored my faith in love (my beau), and I socialise with friends almost every night of the week after work, and all weekend! Looking back, it really doesn't feel that long ago, which helps me keep in mind that if it could go so quickly, then hopefully this period will, too.
                      Anyway, these are just the tricks that are working for me, so far. I don't know if they'll be of any use to you, but I hope so.
                      Surround yourself with friends, and keep busy. Maybe take up a new hobby or two, that way, not only will you have little downtime to sit around and moon, but also lots of interesting new things to chat to him about when you talk!
                      *hugs*
                      Strength to you, and fortune.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        aaaww! *hugs*

                        I hope i could made you feel better, but i know its truly hard time for you i've been there and i could say you're lucky enough to have him longer!

                        Its always a sad thing to say good bye to other part of us... i remember the last day i visit him, i became so emotional, we even had arguments over silly stuff.. like visiting the Bayeern Muenchen football club hahah... i just know i feel beyond say--maybe just like how you feel.. but i just don't want to cry in front of him so i get mad at him! hahah not a wise thing but at the airport both of us hugging and crying.. and i never feel that sad before... so i understand how you feel.

                        I hope you get better soon... keep your self busy.... just remember there will be another time for you to hug each other again be positive ok?

                        cheers!

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Keep yourself busy. Eat chocolate, ice cream, whatever it is you feel like eating to make you feel better. I'm not condoning emotional eating because I know that's a serious issue, but you're excused in this situation. I did exactly the same. I bought chocolate for days. Sleep if you're able. Do stuff that will keep you occupied and that doesn't remind you of him. Call a friend if you can, or a relative, and talk about it. Try not to stay home so much, because that's where all the memories are.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            We all know how it is. Hope you could sleep and wake up feeling a little better. sleep is one of the few things that helps.


                            and hope you could talk to him and it made you feel better.

                            *hugs*

                            our story.

                            sigpic

                            02.02.2012 - When we got married and closed the distance once and for all

                            "If it is important to you, you will find a way. If not, you'll find an excuse."

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Sleep did help, and I am feeling a little better....but I am also dealing with what feels like really bad luck. HBB says its probably because I am distracted but I can't seem to stop walking into things, knocking stuff over, leaving my car lights on and finding a dead battery ect. I feel so overwhelmed because of it. He is finally having it hit him now too, and he was crying alot last night which oddly helped. Seeing I was not alone made it hurt less, though seeing him upset is never fun either. Overall its just an adjustment and so far its really hard. Even Skype calls are not the same, we seem to not know what to say anymore. I hope it gets better soon

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