I have one last question. How long should I wait for her to come to me? How long do I wait until I know if she wants to continue our relationship or not? This question has bugged me ever since this started.
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Start of LDR: December 2009
First met: August 2008
First meeting irl: Never
Break up: February 8 2012
Price of relationship: Pain
Price of the memories: Priceless
I'll always know that she was my first love that I took seriously.
I'll miss you, Vanessa.
I may young and stupid but I can't help it at all.
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I would honestly give it at least a week, and then re-evaluate it from there. :/{ Our Story on LFAD }
Our Beginning
Met online: February 2009
Feelings confessed: December 2010
Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
Officially together since: 08 April 2011
Our Story
First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013
Our Happily Ever After
to be continued...
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Well...if you mean a week since this started then almost been a week already. If you are talking about me leaving her be for a week then I might be able to do that. All of this is just hard because frankly I don't want to lose her at all but it just seems like she is just out of my reach now.Start of LDR: December 2009
First met: August 2008
First meeting irl: Never
Break up: February 8 2012
Price of relationship: Pain
Price of the memories: Priceless
I'll always know that she was my first love that I took seriously.
I'll miss you, Vanessa.
I may young and stupid but I can't help it at all.
Comment
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I mean leaving her be for about a week. Within a week seems to be the general time frame for how long these things last, at least from the trend I've noticed, and when my SO was also in need of space immediately after he lost his mother, letting him be the one to come to me for a week or two was pretty much all that was needed. It's amazing what a little bit of space and distance can do. The way I see it though is that you're either going to lose it or you're not, but the way you're going to start repairing it is by showing her you're willing to change to give her her space.{ Our Story on LFAD }
Our Beginning
Met online: February 2009
Feelings confessed: December 2010
Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
Officially together since: 08 April 2011
Our Story
First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013
Our Happily Ever After
to be continued...
Comment
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Originally posted by Eclaire View PostI mean leaving her be for about a week. Within a week seems to be the general time frame for how long these things last, at least from the trend I've noticed, and when my SO was also in need of space immediately after he lost his mother, letting him be the one to come to me for a week or two was pretty much all that was needed. It's amazing what a little bit of space and distance can do. The way I see it though is that you're either going to lose it or you're not, but the way you're going to start repairing it is by showing her you're willing to change to give her her space.Start of LDR: December 2009
First met: August 2008
First meeting irl: Never
Break up: February 8 2012
Price of relationship: Pain
Price of the memories: Priceless
I'll always know that she was my first love that I took seriously.
I'll miss you, Vanessa.
I may young and stupid but I can't help it at all.
Comment
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Originally posted by AsianRawr! View PostYeah, I am willing to change to give her her own space but can doing nothing for a week also lose it all? I know each person is different when it comes to this but can ignoring the problem and not attempting to fix it end up making it end? In my mind it just drives me crazy that I'm not doing anything to try and fix this at all when the right thing to do is to just give her space. I want to do everything I can to fix this problem but it hurts to know that the only thing I can do is just wait. If I end losing her, how will I know that? After a week of letting her have her space, how can I know if its ending for us or not? I just have this gut feeling that if she doesn't contact me for a week then it just makes seem like it is ending but my brain wouldn't rest until I heard it from her myself yet if she still ignores me even then how can I get my peace from her?{ Our Story on LFAD }
Our Beginning
Met online: February 2009
Feelings confessed: December 2010
Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
Officially together since: 08 April 2011
Our Story
First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013
Our Happily Ever After
to be continued...
Comment
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Originally posted by Eclaire View PostDoing nothing for a week can "lose it" when a) it's already not working out (someone posted about a SO who wanted space/time and then got pissy because they were given it, which in my opinion, shows the relationship is beyond the fixing point already) or b) when it's not to do with matters of space. The reason doing "nothing" is what's likely to fix this situation is because she's called you clingy, oppressing, and controlling, essentially. Those are all feelings/perceptions that will be increased and perpetuated if you continue to hound her. You already have not received any response to what you've already sent. Why send more? What more could you possibly have to say? You need to cool it and back off or you're going to scare her into never wanting to hear from you again. You figure out what you do in a week based on what happens. There are a hundred and one different routes you could take but it's going to depend on a lot, so for right now, keep yourself busy and distracted, blog to your heart's content, and leave her be until she's ready to come to you.Start of LDR: December 2009
First met: August 2008
First meeting irl: Never
Break up: February 8 2012
Price of relationship: Pain
Price of the memories: Priceless
I'll always know that she was my first love that I took seriously.
I'll miss you, Vanessa.
I may young and stupid but I can't help it at all.
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