Announcement

Collapse
No announcement yet.

Missing Him More Than Ever

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Missing Him More Than Ever

    I got back yesterday from spending a week with my SO in my home country. It was the third time that we'd seen each other but the previous two times he came here. I'm not sure if it's just me, or does it get more difficult every time that you have to say good bye? I'm not sure if it was harder this time because I'd seen members of my family, of who I hadn't seen in almost 18 months, or because it was my country that I was leaving. But it was definitely a lot harder. I cried the whole time from when I left my SO to when I landed in Sweden and was able to text him.

    The first time we said good bye it wasn't so bad because we'd only seen each other for a week and only been together officially for about 3 months. But I cried after I'd left him, and for the week after I wasn't at all hungry and just went to school, came back, and stayed in my room the whole time. He doesn't know that I did this because I didn't want to tell him and then to get all freaked out and think that I was being stupid.

    The second time we said good bye it was worse, I started getting upset the night before he left (so he knows that I was upset then). And then the next day we were really quiet the whole way to the airport (4 hours) and then at the airport I was trying not to make our last moments together too sad, but when we had to say good bye I was in floods of tears and didn't want him to go. And then the same thing happened the week after, like it did the time before, where I only ate a small lunch for the week and only went to school, and stayed in my room the rest of the time.

    But this time was by far the worst. I started getting upset the day before I had to come back here, and so did he. My last night there I cried quite a lot and really didn't want to come back. Yesterday morning I cried a lot too, and my SO was quite upset too and so was his Mum, because she didn't want me to go either! On the way to the airport we said nothing, only my SO's sister trying to make us a bit happier and not so upset and sad. I said good bye to his Mum and sister a bit before so that we could have some alone time before I had to go and that was really sad too - both me and his Mum cried a bit then. Then we went and sat down and talked for a bit but then I just got even more upset! Then when it was almost time for me to go through security we started hugging and crying and promising to text when we got back and stuff. But now I'm feeling really bad, I've been crying all day and trying to keep my mind off of the fact that we can't be together at the moment and thinking about the future, but my Mum is being so negative about it all (I'm planning on moving back to England any time between now and September) and it really isn't helping. She keeps saying that we'll talk abut it but she keeps putting it off.

    Does anyone have any ideas as to how I can not be so upset all the time and make the distance slightly more bearable or anything?

    (Btw, sorry that I wrote so much, it's kind of all relevant, I think.)

    Thank you in advance
    No time zone or distance or anything can keep us apart

    #2
    If you figure out a solution, please let me know... I have been struggling with this problem for almost 10 years

    Comment


      #3
      I know this feeling so well!! The first time we met, I cried but I tried not to be a cry baby about it so I cried after he went through the gate. But it wasn't so bad because we already had plans to see each other in a month. The second time I only let myself only cry a little because I didnt want to be blubbering. But I always feel like I just want to cling and beg and never leave. Its terrible!!

      Now its been 2 months, and we could have another 2 months to go before we are together again. It is so hard!! But honestly, while nothing makes it easier, there is one thought that helps me not sob my eyes out the entire time we are together. I want the time we spend together to be the best it can be. I want to be happy and enjoy our time because its so precious. That being said we hold hands constantly, I am always close to him or hugging him because I have to bank all those feelings for later. But we promise not to think about the end until we are getting out of the car at the airport, and until that final moment when our hands break as I walk toward the security check point...until then...it is OUR time. And our time is wonderful because being together with him makes me so happy. And that is all I want to focus on...

      I dont know if that makes any sense at all....but thats the only way I have seemed to make it through.

      I will say, finding this board is giving me so much more strength and belief that this LD thing will not tear us to pieces!!

      Comment


        #4
        Make sure that to use Skype, communicate a lot and send each other things in the mail. It seems insignificant, but all of those things help me out. I know things seem so hard when you leave him, but just think about all the good things and the good times and try to think of the next time you're going to see each other. Honestly, it's the little things that mean the most, especially when you can't see each other.

        Comment


          #5
          I think we can both make the argument for which is harder. Being the one to leave and walk away, or being the one who has to watch them walk away. But either way it is painful. And there is really no way to know which is harder. Besides that, one time may be easier than the time before it, but the 10th time you leave may be harder than the first.

          Every time is hard and every time is different.

          Sorry you have to go through this.
          Got together Jan 3, 2011~ Closed the Distance March 23, 2012~ Living Together Since June 19 2012~ Future TBD......

          I miss you more than I ever could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal." ~ Vita Sackville-west

          Comment


            #6
            Thank you for the help We always talk on the phone when my SO gets in from school for about an hour an a half (today it was two hours) and then we send messages to each other over Viber, and sometimes Facebook, until we decide to go to sleep. Then, because I usually sleep before him, he sends me a super long message saying really cute things for me to read in the morning when I wake up. And I have sent him letters and presents, but he's not so good at it so I have to specifically tell him when I want him to send me something or write me a letter But I don't mind so much I was thinking of asking my SO if we could try video calling on Skype because then I can actually show him stuff and see him, but I don't want him to say no :/
            No time zone or distance or anything can keep us apart

            Comment


              #7
              I am exactly the same as you, every time I have to say goodbye, it gets worse, I cry for longer and get more and more down. But I find that after a week or so, I begin to feel a bit normal again and can get on with my life a bit more productively.

              I find that the best thing is to keep yourself busy. I always just want to shut myself in my room, but actually, if you force yourself out - go to the gym, meet up with friends etc... it makes things get better a bit faster.

              Just ask to Skype, I'm sure he wouldn't mind, it helps so much just to see their face!!

              Your SO sounds very sweet, so try to remember all the things you love about him when he's not there

              Comment

              Working...
              X