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How would your life be different...

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    How would your life be different...

    ...if you had never met your SO?

    My life would be drastically different. I like to think I'd have done the cool thing and quit my job and went and traveled like I'd always planned. But most of me believes I'd still be in my hometown, slugging away at my job, saving up for extensive travel during summer vacations. I'd probably be single (I had been single for 4 years when I met my SO), maybe still messing around with a guy who I knew a long time ago wasn't right for me. I'd maybe even be on a dating site, looking for someone to make me feel pretty.

    I certainly wouldn't be in Costa Rica, patting my dog, listening to the first rains of the season, waiting for the love of my life to come home and give me a kiss...
    Last edited by lucybelle; April 3, 2012, 07:16 PM.

    #2
    I always dreamed of studying abroad, working abroad, doing something that would allow me to spend a significant amount of time in Europe and/or Australia, but I'm not sure I would have been as motivated to stand up to my grandfather and do my gap year abroad for me had my SO not come along. He was, perhaps, the boot in my ass that I needed to actually take it seriously, and he's given me a lot to think about. I grew up in a home where the idea of "if you take time off school, you'll never go back!" (mainly due to my grandfather's influence) ran rampant and I think my SO has given me reason to challenge that idea, and it's amazing me how many of my professors admit to having taken time off before grad school or even while in the middle of their studies!

    I'm not sure how my life would have differed other than that he was an enabler in my gaining the courage to stand up to my grandfather. I was attaining that courage on my own, but slowly. My SO more or less lit a fire.
    { Our Story on LFAD }


    Our Beginning
    Met online: February 2009
    Feelings confessed: December 2010
    Unofficially together since: January/February 2011
    Officially together since: 08 April 2011

    Our Story
    First meeting in person: 16 August - 14 September 2011
    Second visit: 17 March - 01 April 2012
    Third visit: 23 July - 13 September 2012
    Fourth visit: Looking at 23 March - 6 April 2013

    Our Happily Ever After
    to be continued...

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      #3
      My life would be so different. I probably would not have lived all the places I have lived so far because usually I have followed my SO where he goes. I probably would still be living in my hometown. I would also probably be on a few dating websites, because I am not a very outgoing person.

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        #4
        I'd probably be much closer to my childhood best friend if I hadn't met my SO. Maybe not best friends any longer but we'd have made many more adult memories. I think I'd still be plugging away at life but I think I'd also still be fooling myself into believing that being in love meant having constant drama with ups and downs. Being with him calms me.

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          #5
          I would probably have settled. I'd still be with my ex, totally losing myself in an unhealthy relationship, trying to please him to avoid fights, with an engagement ring on my finger that would only be a burden to me. I'd be doomed to an unhappy marriage and a mediocre life...

          But now all I can think is "Thank God you came along and changed it all baby"

          “Laughing like children, living like lovers, rolling like thunder under the covers”

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            #6
            I'd be entirely a different person. We've been best friends for the entirety of our teenager-dom, so we've done a lot of our growing up sorta... Together. I actually can't imagine the person I would have become without him.
            At a guess, I'd be... Probably more silly when it comes to guys, naive, more highly strung. Less logical. Shorter temper.
            To be honest, I'd probably have lower standards and expectations out of a partner. I'd have less confidence that who I was - my thoughts, my personality - would be worthy of love.
            My SO has always challenged me. We're equals. The dynamics of our friendship taught me a lot about guys and what I want out of a partner. I'm not sure exactly why THIS friendship always had such impact on me, but it did, and it is so obvious to me where we've rubbed off on each other.

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              #7
              I don't think I'd be that far off from where I am now. Maybe I'd still be doing honors. I think maybe I'd have met someone else online and I'd be with them instead. Or maybe I'd meet someone irl for once.
              Canadian permanent residence APPROVED!
              Closed the Distance: 09/26/2019
              Engaged: 09/26/2020

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                #8
                I probably wouldn't be here, my SO found me while I was in a very dark spot in my life and he came along and showed me the light, my SO literally saved my life. If I would have found another way down from the ledge I probably would be a lot closer to my friends, they've been very distant lately because my SO doesn't want me around alcohol which is what usually tended to come out during our get togethers. Honestly though meeting my SO inspired so much in me I can't even imagine what my life would have been like without him, a very dismal one I am sure of that.

                Notes:
                Met: 8.17.09
                Started Dating: 8.20.09
                First Met: 10.2.10
                Closed the Distance: 8.9.14

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                  #9
                  She has taught me to appreciate things in life that I didn't appreciate before. I believe in her I found a female counterpart that is as intellectual as I am, but her way of approaching life and things is a beauty to watch. She also met me in a very dark spot in my life. I told her that I am thankful to have met her because of that. I did not mean in meeting her, it just happened. She has also taught me to work hard for things in life. We always challenge each other in one way or another. I've seen so many things and been to different places because of her and I am glad to have shared those moments with her and those to come.

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                    #10
                    I would still be doing what I'm doing now, going to school working on my degree. But I would probably be sitting around hoping and waiting for a guy to come along and not knowing one was at home waiting for me. I don't know it's weird, he fits so well into my life that him not being in it just doesn't fit in my head. It makes no sense to me. Or if he had never been, it wouldn't be much different from what it was before he came into it. I'm still the same person, with the same plan for my life as before. He just fits into that plan flawlessly that him not being in it, just doesn't work out.
                    ". . . We obviously have to come to accept it, but that doesn't stop it from gnawing at us day by day.
                    The best we can do is enjoy our time together, anticipate our reunions, and remain passionate and loyal through distance." ~Mike <3



                    ~*~11.21.2010~*~

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                      #11
                      My life would have been very different. I feel sure that if I hadn't met my SO I would still be single.
                      Because of him I suddenly got so many opportunities in my life and I suddenly didn't have to worry about money and such depressing things. He made it possible for me to do more of the things I really wanted to. He became the travel partner I always sought and he've taken me on adventures through the countries I've always wanted to visit.

                      I guess the thing with love is that life just seems to have more meaning when you're with that person. So trying to imagine how my life would have been suddenly makes me realize how much he has changed.
                      Like I said, I would still be single, would still be a student like I am now, but on a string-tight budget, probably living in a dorm and not an apartment. I would still be studying in Japan right now, but then it would probably only be my 6th time. Here I would have lived in a dorm as well - probably trying to seek out good looking Japanese guys in hopes of fulfilling my long time life goal of marrying one. And I wouldn't yet have discovered how much I'm able to love a single person.
                      Last edited by milaya; April 3, 2012, 11:06 PM.

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                        #12
                        I would probably have done a tour of europe... I may have even wanted to live and work there for a while. I honestly had no idea what I wanted to do with my life though.

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                          #13
                          I think my life would have been quite a bit different.

                          I probably would have continued taking random courses at the local university, maybe being close to getting a bachelor of arts now which I would have no idea what I wanted to do with. I probably would hang out with my high school friends more. I'd probably still be single because I've always been scared to even look at a guy the wrong way to give the wrong impression to them. I'd probably not be a Vegetarian/Vegan. I'd probably not have gone to the UK, especially not by myself. I'd probably not have learned to knit or crochet. There are a lot of ways my life would have been different. haha he changed my life so much. He's made me more comfortable to be who I want to be, and be less about pleasing those around me.

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                            #14
                            Unfortunately, I probably would have bounced around from relationship to relationship, and not being able to find one to settle down with (or settling down with the wrong person). That's why I'm glad I've found an anchor (in the good sense) in her.
                            National Novel Writing Month Participant- 2010, 2011, 2012
                            National Novel Writing Month Winner- 2010, 2011, 2012

                            Current Writing Project: Wait Until Next Year

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                              #15
                              I probably wouldn't be going to the college I'm at right now, that's for sure. Funny, my SO and I had a conversation very similar to this today!

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