I don't know how this is going to sound, but I would just like to have a standing ovation for anyone who is dating a single parent. That goes for women who are dating men who are fathers and men who are dating mothers and mothers who are dating mothers and fathers who are dating fathers. Seriously.
I see so many threads about ex's and jealousy and trust issues and I can get that. I totally understand. However, for those of us who are dating someone who will have their ex's in their life for the *rest* of their life, I would like to say: It takes so much patience. It takes so much understanding and sometimes, it will take the shit out of you. It will drain you on some days. It will enlighten you on others. It will make you a weaker and stronger person, all the same.
You know, the kids are adorable, but that's beside the point. You don't realize what you're getting into sometimes, but if you can stick it out, I think all of us (you) deserve a standing ovation. The single parents do as well, but there is just so much I can't explain that a lot of people who do not date single parents do not go through. And even more so, I'd like to make a standing ovation if you're dating LONG DISTANCE and a single parent at the same time. It's a double-whammy and it's rough sometimes. I have been depressed here lately because of some of the issues surrounding some of my current situation. For example, about a month ago, my boyfriend's mother-of-children decided to tell their kids I hated them (also being convinced that I don't like her or her boyfriend - but at this point, she's making it true that I do not like her), which I do not (This is just one issue of several). I think his kids are freaking adorable and in fact, I was depressed this weekend. I got Pez for his kids before I went up to Wisconsin and only one of his kids stayed with him this weekend. Apparently, his son was so happy about the Pez that he grabbed his hair and said "Now! I have to make something for Candi. What to do...what to do.." and it was one of the only things that cheered me up during that whole funk (which I'm still somewhat going through).
My point is, it's rough. We deal with ex's on an almost daily basis, instead of a once in awhile basis (some of us). We deal with hearing stories about the past because it's a big part of their life. You really have to grow up with them. You have to mature just as fast. Honestly, I don't think I have the right words, but I really just wanted to say that if you're doing this, you're a strong person. I'd like to think I've been strong the past year, too.
I see so many threads about ex's and jealousy and trust issues and I can get that. I totally understand. However, for those of us who are dating someone who will have their ex's in their life for the *rest* of their life, I would like to say: It takes so much patience. It takes so much understanding and sometimes, it will take the shit out of you. It will drain you on some days. It will enlighten you on others. It will make you a weaker and stronger person, all the same.
You know, the kids are adorable, but that's beside the point. You don't realize what you're getting into sometimes, but if you can stick it out, I think all of us (you) deserve a standing ovation. The single parents do as well, but there is just so much I can't explain that a lot of people who do not date single parents do not go through. And even more so, I'd like to make a standing ovation if you're dating LONG DISTANCE and a single parent at the same time. It's a double-whammy and it's rough sometimes. I have been depressed here lately because of some of the issues surrounding some of my current situation. For example, about a month ago, my boyfriend's mother-of-children decided to tell their kids I hated them (also being convinced that I don't like her or her boyfriend - but at this point, she's making it true that I do not like her), which I do not (This is just one issue of several). I think his kids are freaking adorable and in fact, I was depressed this weekend. I got Pez for his kids before I went up to Wisconsin and only one of his kids stayed with him this weekend. Apparently, his son was so happy about the Pez that he grabbed his hair and said "Now! I have to make something for Candi. What to do...what to do.." and it was one of the only things that cheered me up during that whole funk (which I'm still somewhat going through).
My point is, it's rough. We deal with ex's on an almost daily basis, instead of a once in awhile basis (some of us). We deal with hearing stories about the past because it's a big part of their life. You really have to grow up with them. You have to mature just as fast. Honestly, I don't think I have the right words, but I really just wanted to say that if you're doing this, you're a strong person. I'd like to think I've been strong the past year, too.
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