Everything's ruined :'(

[enemey96]

So my whole relationship with my SO is ruined.
My SO was planning on coming over to visit 40 days from now (December 21st) for Christmas, and he booked his flights about a month ago now, and then today I got into an argument with my mum and she decided that as my 'punishment' she isn't going to allow my SO to come and visit.
She decided to send a message to my SO's mum informing her of her decision. This then led to my SO's mum saying that she wants my SO to cancel his flights, losing around £300, and that she is never allowing him to come over and stay at my house again.
This means that if ever I want to see my SO again then I have to go and visit him, but I can't, because she's not going to let me leave the country, and besides which, I can't afford that.
She's ruined everything for me, everything when I was younger and now my relationship. My SO is the one person who I love more than anything else in this entire world, without him everything is pointless and I don't know what to do.
I've tried talking to my dad, but he says that there is nothing that he can do - although I know that he can do tons of things, he just won't.
I don't really know what to do about this because I can't lose my SO, he means too much to me. I guess any advice would be great?

[jleec24]

When I was a kid, I had a lot of problems with my mum and my dad also did very little to help. But he did give me one piece of advice which was "Play your cards right"
That's about as much advice as I can give you. Play your cards right. Apologize to your mum. Be nice. Sit down and talk to her and see if you could work out a deal with her. Tell her to let your SO come and in return you'll do whatever she pleases. I know it's going to suck to have to suck up to your mum after what happened but just keep in mind that you are doing this for your SO.

[redapple]

Can i ask how old you both are? My advice would be to get your SO to hold of on cancelling the flights, let things die down a little and either (if your old enough) get a hostel or similar for his stay or work with your parents to sort something out, however if you're a minor living under their roof you have to respect their decisions so go about this maturely and even though your understandably angry with your mum try and get them to see your side and you theirs. Telling your mum that she ruined everything (as much as it may be/feel true) is not going to help you get what you want! I understand your very upset at the moment so try and let the storm blow over a little bit before approaching them. Good luck!!

[lademoiselle]

I agree with the others, try to reason with your mum once she's had a chance to calm down. When we're very angry we sometimes take drastic actions which seem out of proportion when we reflect on them with a cool head! You mum may come round. Just try not to panic - there's probably a way to resolve this situation

[digitalfever]

I just want to point out everything is NOT ruined. Apologise, discuss and come to a compromise. Stay positive!

[ST25]

How old are you guys?

In any case, since you're under her roof, I suggest that you can just sit down with her, apologize and have a talk. Try not to think too much on how you're trying to have her get the trip back on-board, but focus on getting on the same footing as her for the moment.

That's all I have right now, sorry. =(

[MissButterfly]

That is terrible! I can only try to imagine how you feel. It's really radical of your mom, but there's not much you can/should do to change it, or it will get worse. Just keep your head up and handle this maturely, apologize and try to talk about it calmly, that's the only what that might help... Just stay strong and know that there will always be a way if you guys really love each other. Wish you all the best!

[Zephii]

I kinda worry what you did to piss her off so badly Because I'm nosey like that.

It's not ruined though. No one can take a relationship from you. It doesn't work like that. She can stop him staying at your house, but she can't stop him staying at your best mates house or a hotel. Failing that, even if she stops you seeing each other for a large period of time, she can't stop you loving each other. You will still find ways to communicate and get through it. Hell, it might even give you the motivation you need to close the distance sooner.
Hang in there.

[Tooki]

Also, what was the argument over? Did you do something to get your mum angry at you?

And in fairness, your dad needs to respect your mums wishes. It could get very ugly very quickly if he tries to intervene and get you to the UK without her permission.

[stephanieaz]

I agree with others who have said your relationship is not ruined. Your visit may be cancelled, but that has nothing to do with your relationship. Give your mom some time to cool off and talk to her about it.

[Black_Halloween]

Wow what did you do to piss her off so bad? o___0

[enemey96]

I am 16 and my boyfriend is 17.
I don't know what I did to make her so angry, which is what confuses me more than anything :/