Have you ever wished you hadn't met him/her at all?

[THINK2MUCH]

LDRs are an emotional roller coaster. I'm sure you all know what I mean.
When it comes to international LDRs and you want to be with your SO, you have to add more drama to the situation.

---

Traveling abroad isn't by any means cheap.
In some countries you have to deal with cultural and racial issues too.
Language is a problem, food is sometimes an inconvenience, the weather...Oh, I don't even want to start on that...
Vaccination might be a must.
Security...(I live in Mexico, and sadly we're not doing well at all in that department) and I'm sure there's people here who might have to travel to a (or almost a) war zone .
Oh, and you have to add all the trouble that immigration regulations worldwide represent. Sometimes they'll make you feel like your being in love is a felony..That's probably the most frustrating part...
All in all, have you ever felt so overwhelmed that you found yourself wishing you hadn't met him or her at all?

It hasn't happened to me...yet.

[Carenza LaRue]

mmmm.... interesting thread..

I can imagine all the things you mentioned... fortunately it hasn't happened to me ..hope it will never happen to all of us actually... must feel terrible.

[lademoiselle]

I kind of felt that way at the start of our relationship, not so much "I wish I'd never met you..." as "things sure weren't as complicated as this before I met you!" I think I was unprepared for what being in an LDR would entail, and it was made worse by the fact I'd led a very sheltered and restricted life up until that point. I'd just turned 18 and had left school with no idea what to do next, I'd never had a boyfriend before, I didn't have a penny to my name... the list went on! But, time passed, I grew up, circumstances changed, I got closer to my SO, and now I can't imagine not having met him. No matter the adversity, love is what makes life worth living, and I wouldn't give that up for anything in the world.

[TwoThree]

Yeah, it's happened. Not to go into details, but in order for us to be together and close the distance for good, I'll have to go against everything my family stands for. It is going to cause a lot of heartache on both sides, and fights, and probably quite a few burnt bridges. So I don't care about all the money it's both cost us to maintain our relationship, I don't care about the efforts, the emotional strain caused by the distance and about the fact that I'll have to uproot my life to be with him. It's the family side of things that's going to suck, and it's when considering it that I think things would have been easier had we never met.

On the other hand, if I hadn't met him, my life would be entirely different, in a very bad way.

[Carenza LaRue]

I kind of felt that way at the start of our relationship, not so much "I wish I'd never met you..." as "things sure weren't as complicated as this before I met you!" I think I was unprepared for what being in an LDR would entail, and it was made worse by the fact I'd led a very sheltered and restricted life up until that point. I'd just turned 18 and had left school with no idea what to do next, I'd never had a boyfriend before, I didn't have a penny to my name... the list went on! But, time passed, I grew up, circumstances changed, I got closer to my SO, and now I can't imagine not having met him. No matter the adversity, love is what makes life worth living, and I wouldn't give that up for anything in the world.

c'est une vraiment belle histoire !
my thoughts exactly....

[lucybelle]

All the bureaucracy and red tape is a huge pain in the ass. Not to mention the other issues you stated.

But look, when it comes down to it, I would swim to my SO if I had to. I'd do anything to be with him. He's worth every immigration headache, and more.

[ThePiedPiper]

I never felt this way while I was in my relationship, mainly because while I realised it would have been easier not to have the distance, in that moment, he was worth pursuing regardless of the distance. Now, after we've ended it, this thought still hasn't crossed my mind (okay, maybe when he calls me 12+ times in a short time span ), though I probably would not actively pursue an international LDR again.

[stephanieaz]

All the bureaucracy and red tape is a huge pain in the ass. Not to mention the other issues you stated.

But look, when it comes down to it, I would swim to my SO if I had to. I'd do anything to be with him. He's worth every immigration headache, and more.

This is exactly how I feel. I've never had any regrets. The immigration stuff is a pain, the heartache can be overwhelming, the cost of everything is crazy... but at the end of the day, I am confident that he is worth it.

[Softy]

LDR are rough...
I still get angry for nothing, i cry often and it's painful to look at surrounding happy couples...

But I never ever thought 'wish i hadn't met him'.
He's fantastic, I love him so much.
They day we will close the distance, all the pain and sadness will disappear to leave place to happiness only.

Think about the happy side more than the wait : )

cheers

[Hololz]

I'm not sure it's "I wish we had never met" but I do often wonder how different things would be if we hadn't. During our periods of distance it was obviously difficult. We didn't have immigration problems or anything as we're both from the same country but the heartache, etc sometimes led to thoughts of "would my life be easier without this person". I decided that my life would be a lot harder without my SO. He is my rock and my best friend, I'm so glad neither of us gave up! I truly believe our relationship is stronger because of the distance. Ultimately I found overcoming all the emotional roller coasters of an LDR made me a stronger, more resilient person!

[Moon]

No, I never feel that way, if I did, I wouldn't do this. While I believe LDR's have different challenges, I honestly don't think they're harder than traditional relationships, I think much of that is your (collective your, not necessarily the OP's) own perception.

If we're to ever close the distance, it will mean leaving my daughter behind, which is the only part of this relationship that makes me unhappy, but every relationship has hardships. My guy is the man I've waited for my whole life, how could I ever wish I never met him? I'm happy, even if he's over 4000 miles away, I've been around long enough to realize the importance in that, and I'd rather have him far away than not at all I love him, he loves me, we're compatible and that's a big thing, so we'll figure it out.

[Verojoon]

No, never. Even when things were hard... even when we were apart over the summer... I'm happier with the person I've become since I've met him!

[D.4C]

omg...no...the only thing i wish...is that she was here already...she is the best thing to happen to me in a very long time...it is hard with all the miles between us...almost 2000...but our love can surpass those miles...i miss her...more each day...but in the end...it's all very worth it

[dizzyupthemeg]

All the bureaucracy and red tape is a huge pain in the ass. Not to mention the other issues you stated.

But look, when it comes down to it, I would swim to my SO if I had to. I'd do anything to be with him. He's worth every immigration headache, and more.

This, 100%. I couldn't say it any better.

[XxFranticLovexX]

Nope, never. The way I see it is that any time that I have spent with someone that has made things better for me or made me happy is worth it. I do wish that he was closer, but it could be worse. He could be across the country or in a different country where it would be far more difficult to be able to see him, but I still wouldn't wish that I had never met him. He has been a great friend since we first started talking and he has been a great bf since we got together. Even if it had worked out to where we were unable to see each other or actually be together it would still be worth knowing him just for the friendship that we have had for the past two years.