Cheated On

[digitalfever]

You said in a previous post (I forget where) that he’s cheated on EVERY girlfriend he’s had except for his wife (which I personally would be skeptical of) and you (also I’d remain skeptical.) If someone admits to being a cheater then I think it’s smart to believe him and never assume that you’re going to be the exception. You may end up being his exception and the one he truly dedicates himself too but again… I’d remain cautious and assume the worst.

[dizzyupthemeg]

I'm sorry this is happening to you, but don't stay with him out of obligation or because you feel he is "worth" it. You are worth more than being betrayed and lied to.

I don't have a lot to say because I feel everyone else has covered most of it BUT I do want to reiterate this part. Remember that you are worth more than being lied to. I find 9 out of 10 times my gut feeling is right. Don't be afraid to put yourself first here and remember that regardless of how this turns out, you deserve to be told the truth, and you deserve a relationship that holds the same standards as you do.

[Malaga]

I'm sorry you're going through this. Unfortunately, cheaters often do that, they deny everything even when faced with the hardest evidence, it's basically cheating guidebook 101. I know you're so confused right now and just want some answers. But I think the best thing you could do is to take some time for yourself, go no contact until your mind is a bit clearer. Don't let him blow up your phone or confuse you even more with guilt shifting and gaslighting. I doubt you'll get any answers from him this way, it'll just frustrate you even more. Let him dwell over the mess while you gather your thoughts. Then when your feelings settle a bit, contact him again when you feel ready to talk.

Good luck xx

[princessmaria]

It's safe to assume he's guilty if he's blowing up at you and making you feel guilty. That's what liars typically do. I'm really sorry you're going through this and that you trusted him. He at least owes you the truth, and it really sucks that he isn't giving you that. I doubt his friend would lie over something like that (even as a joke). I hope you get your answers soon. xx

[barret95]

Well considering the fact that he was treating you like you're not his first priority a while before the cabin, and also he has admitted that he has cheated on every girl he's dated right? AND he is putting the guilt on you, it's all telling you he's too ashamed to tell you the truth!
like others said about Scott, he has nothing to gain by lying to you. the fact that your SO is more angry at you than Scott gives you more clues that he did cheat.
He's guilty and he knows you know it.
I am honestly so sorry about what happened, you trusted him and he blew it. If he isn't willing to give you the truth even when it's pretty clear that you know the truth then it's more than likely he is guilty.

I'm so sorry this is all happening to you.
*hugs* xxx

[Louise_B]

Ok firstly thank you to everyone who has given me support and kind words since i posted the thread. I have updates but I'm not to sure what to make of it at the moment. Ive heard Scott and his gf's side but i didn't really have much time for my SO this morning because i was so hurt. Before talking more to my SO about this i went off my own back and messaged Scott and his girlfriend and i asked them to take a screen shot of the text conversation between Scott and Justin as for me i wanted to see it in front of me instead of hearing just words of what my SO has done. Scott and Amber's reply to that was .. 'hes just blowing up' so i asked amber what about and amber said 'Scott isn't telling me" which kind of peed me off because if you can tell me the guy who i love has cheated on me why can you not tell me what hes saying in the texts?

I then finally got to speak with Justin. through text AND on the phone. Ok its a little confusing to explain and will be confusing trying to understand it as i did get confuse when Justin was telling me. Now my so is a soldier and hes been told through the grape vine he maybe going to Syria IF it kicks off, Now justin is a very patriotic soldier he would rather die in a war-zone fighting for his country then dying in the states for nothing and Scott doesn't agree with that his against the war and dislikes justins job infact they both have had countless arguments since the syria thing has irrupted about Justin wanting to go over and Scott thinking his an idiot. Now from justins mouth .. an argumnt got very heated on the phone between the both of them last night about this situation and justins phone died. and next thing justin new i was texting him with this drama. So what justin was basically trying to tell me is that Scott made up this bullshit to put the spanners in the works between justin and i so he would concentrate on me and us as a couple instead of being caught up with a war that might break out. (hard to believe hes best friend would do such a think i know) .. and i was thinking exactly what you all will be thinking now .. that's until Justin screenshot the texts between Justin and Scott and Scott actually confessed he 'lied to save Justin'

Screen shots as follows:

[URL=https://s975.photobucket.com/user/louiseboorman/media/581568_713419575340466_1747334949_n_zps2b2972fd.jp g.html]







Now .. i have both sides of a story .. i can now believe my SO or believe his best friend. Its something obviously I'm going to have to think about. I got words from his best friend but written words from Justin. i don't know girls ..

[redapple]

personally, the Syria thing? Sounds like BS in my opinion. Im pretty sure if his friend didn't want him to go there's nothing he could do about it- correct me if I'm wrong but if he's in the military surely he has no choice where he goes or when. British army get told where and when and they have to go basically. So how him breaking up with you would stop him going to Syria I don't understand?

My instincts say he cheated. But the main thing here is what do yours say? You're never going to know exactly what happened but to me the friends given a plausible story, it fits with his past and with the way he's responded since. The Syria thing just seems like something to try and throw you off and convert him into a hero (I didn't like the honerable death thing sorry...!)

[kattermole]

Can you tell Scott you've seen this text of him supposedly admitting he lied (it's so badly written it could mean almost anything...) and see what he says? The whole thing seems v fishy and slightly ridiculous.

[SJ22]

If the story about Scots lying is true he really is one son of a B*. Doesnt look like he thought about you for ONE second.

[princessmaria]

Can you tell Scott you've seen this text of him supposedly admitting he lied (it's so badly written it could mean almost anything...) and see what he says? The whole thing seems v fishy and slightly ridiculous.

I'm with you on the ridiculous part. It doesn't make any sense whatsoever. There's no logic about telling someone's GF that they cheated so that they won't want to go to war in Syria. If he's already enlisted in the military and America does deploy to Syria he has no choice but to go if he is drafted.

It seems like Scott is saying "I said it was a lie to save you" as in "I said that you DIDN'T cheat in order to save you". The way he worded it is awful so like kattermole said, it can be taken either way. I'm still leaning towards him cheating though because his excuse and Scott's supposed reasoning for making it up is mediocre.

[Kanga]

I just woke up, so a bit confused, but I'm fairly certain he has no choice in the matter if he has to go syria or not. I'm not sure why his friend would lie to break you guys up so he doesn't have to go to syria? It doesn't make sense. I think he made out with the girl, only based on the past history of him cheating on other girlfriends. Idk, though. The friend sounds ridiculous either way.

[Laural007]

I may be the odd one out, but the fact that Justin's BEST FRIEND would text you out of the blue and betray his best friend seems odd to me. Why would he betray his trust with Justin when the friend really has nothing to do with you, unless he has a selfish reason. Does his friend like you, doesn't like you? If he didn't care for you I can see him trying to put a rift in your relationship. Maybe you are taking too much of Justin's time and he is jealous. On the other hand, if Justin didn't cheat on you, it seems odd that he wouldn't be taking screeen shots of his converstations asking his best friend what they he** was his problem for straight up lying.

I hope you get some clarity soon.

[snow_girl]

I may be the odd one out, but the fact that Justin's BEST FRIEND would text you out of the blue and betray his best friend seems odd to me. Why would he betray his trust with Justin when the friend really has nothing to do with you

See this exactly makes me think that he did cheat. If he has nothing to do with her then why would he go out of his way to tell her something like that unless he did actually cheat and he thought he deserved to know.

People don't just go out of their way to cause shit with people they don't know well. It's just like when friend or someone tells you they think the person you are with is bad news. It isn't necessarily because they are jealous or don't want you to be happy,, it is probably because they see something you don't.

[barret95]

that story sounds kinda fishy, like others said.
it 's totally F***ed up that a best friend would cause this sort of drama. I say go with your gut instinct.

[Louise_B]

Scott has contacted me and he's told me hes 'fucked up big time' that he got furious that him and justin were in an argument about him getting enlisting (his due out in 2015) which means he will have more of a chance of getting deployed to Syria. He was furioius about this and said justin was selfish. Because justin said the only thing he cares about is hes career and me. The fact he never said his friends isnt his priority got to Ryan and he lashed out to casue drama. the spur of the moment hot headed bullshit that you dont mean.

Scott has also sent me the screen shots of his and justins conversation since this morning when i found out and justin confronted him about it all (justin has also sent me the same exact screen shots from his end of the texts so i havent missed anything). And it seems like Justin WAS telling the truth and that Ryan was really being a twisted fucking idiot. its sick! But it doesnt surprise me as himself and hes girlfriend both have mental health issues.

I now have evidence that Justin NEVER cheated on me .. well from both of the two people who are involved in this.

Could i be a fool to believe this .. Possibly yes. But its something i will have to stand back from and have me time. Justin understands that and he respects that! We have just been on facetime for the past hour talking everything through.