The Exes talk. Have you had it? And exes on Facebook

[polkapiggy]

My SO hates facebook so he doesn't have it, and although i have it i've never had any issues with my exes, in fact, i'm still good friends with one of them. We've had the exes talk but honestly there isn't much to say. We're both still teenagers and our past relationships weren't exactly serious. They were nothing like the relationship we're in now, so the whole exes thing isn't really relevant XD

[Bluestars]

When we first started dating, I used to pester Jared to tell me about his exes because I was curious. He didn't want mention them, but he finally did after I wouldn't leave him alone about it. I ended up getting really jealous though >.< Although this is both our most serious relationship, I couldn't help but compare myself to them .... Jared would get jealous too when I talked about my ex though. Now, I think that some things are just meant to be private and should not be mentioned. I learned my lesson lol!

I only have one real ex-boyfriend and that only lasted a month, but I believe exes should be kept in the past. I ended up deleting my ex off of my facebook two times. The first was when he dumped me because I didn't want to keep stalking his facebook or see his statuses. He sent me another friend request later and I accepted, but I kept on getting annoyed because he would always message me when I was on facebook. I deleted him again because I didn't have anything to say to him. But I think it depends on how long you were friends before you start dating on whether or not you decide to be friends again.

[hoppity]

I've always been in the "I don't want to know" camp, why torture myself with jealousy of what a partner has been up to with various exes. Facebook and Friends Reunited pretty much killed my marriage as my husband was on there all the time tracking down old grilfriends, chatting to them and eventually the trust in our relationship was gone. He knew it upset me and yet never stopped. Fingers crossed we will be properly divorced and separated in a couple of months.

My LDR is on facebook but doesn't post much on there, I know a little about his ex wife but not much other than she seemed to have screwed him up a bit and left him so guarded with his feelings. Will persevere, he's lovely and worth waiting for.

[Jassy_love]

I have 3 of my exes on my FB ... but now I see them as friends and they see me the same way. He hasn't asked though, and I haven't asked him.
Hmm I wonder what his reaction or mine would be ...

[Manoek]

Pfffff don't get me started

I have one ex ex on facebook, I have been with him for 3 years and my SO is jealous sometimes because my ex is still a friend of mine. We don't hang out together, just the two of us, but when we go out with our group of friends he is always there, and of course my SO doesn't like that. If it would be the other way around I wouldn't like it!

My SO has one ex that bothers me, she is GORGEOUS! And she has a hidden agenda, but he is to naief to see it. But I trust him! His other ex, that he just deleted on FB was also a pain in the ass, but more to him then to me.. So never really cared about her.

[carolynred]

My SO and I have had the exes talk but a lot of it was due to the fact that his ex and my exes all at the same time starting to us again. XD We were actually very comfortable with the talk, and in a way we learned about one another through each other's stories. I know what he has gone through and he knows what I have gone through, so we both understand why we are the way we are at this point. It felt good to be able to open up and share our pasts together, especially because now he knows why I'm sensitive to certain things and the like.

I have two of my exes on Facebook and the third has me blocked on Facebook. xD Two of them don't talk to me, but the one that does is seriously pushing my buttons. He likes to tell me that its wrong to date whoever I am dating at the time and that I make horrible decisions in life. My SO does not like this ex at all, needless to say. Facebook and exes can equal lots of drama sometimes. xD

[floridaellen]

My SO doesn't have any exs. He has had a few sexual partners but they were random girls at parties when he used to be a partier so..... he doesn't even know them :P Makes it easier for me!

I have one ex. My SO knows about him and even knows him. My ex and I dislike each other (pretty strongly...) so my SO knows there is no competition whatsoever.

[usmcgirl]

We had this talk, although we weren't planning on it.. *sigh* I was on fbook & deleting some people so I made a status asking people to like it if they wanted to be left on. Well, my exboyfriend liked it and rather than message him and start a convo, I commented and said "his-name-tagged; Sorry, but I'm gonna veto this..." A few of my friends started giving him - good-natured - teasing. They weren't being rude or anything, honestly, and all the sudden my ex messaged me, just going off cussing me out but he refused to comment. So in the end, Anthony & my ex got in a fight and all of this and it was such drama and the next thing I know Anthony's messaging me asking me wth my relationship was with this guy. So we had a discussion and allllllllllll of our dating history came out. Then, like a day later, his exgirlfriend walked up and asked him who I was, if we were dating, and if I was better than her (She meant in the sex dpmnt.) I got pissed/jealous and he refuses to tell me her last name because he doesn't want drama. Damn bitch..

[Rugger]

No, my SO and I have never had the ex talk. Some things have come out because my ex was abusive so that had to come out. Other things have come out through other people, such as he dated his best friend's twin and he had a thing for another female friend. I'd rather have the relationship talk than have it come out bit by bit and feel like he's hiding this from me.

[dglynn77]

I dislike Facebook XD

Me too! So much drama!

Yes, we had the exes talk, mainly because my last relationship was so hurtful to me. I was depressed for several months after we broke up, and it changed me - not for the better. Sometimes random things will set me off and I will forget that my SO is not trying to hurt me in any way, that he is a completely different and better person. It was easier to just give an explanation so that as things like that would happen, and as I become more like the old me (that i like and miss ) it will make sense and not be confusing to him.

So, short answer - Yes. and it went well!

[marbear31]

Well, we ended up having (part of) the exes talk on the second date, because he has a son with one of his exes. :P At first, I just put her out of my mind, but I can't really with his son in the picture--and I realize my original approach was wrong. They have very minimal contact (only about things that have to do with his son), which definitely helps. I can be a very jealous person (even though I try my best not to be), but it was only when he told me that they'd been on and off for a several years that I thought about it more. He has done nothing to indicate that they would get together; in fact, he has shown me nothing but trust, support, and completely open communication about his relationships (albeit with time :P) since we began dating. There's been a couple of times when he's said something unwittingly (just a reference to a past ex that had to do with our conversation in the moment) that made my gut clench--but I always let him know when it does, and he's always extra tender and caring then. I'm one of those girls that wears my heart on my sleeve, and honesty and faithfulness are the most important things to me in a relationship, so he has been open, particularly regarding those facets, since the very beginning. It took awhile for him to open up (completely) about the number he'd been with, but I told him I accepted him regardless. To me, the past is the past, and I trust him utterly. I'm also completely secure in the depth of our love for each other, so I don't worry about him doing anything (he's had exes try to contact him while we were dating, but he always lets meknow).

I think it's also different for me because he is my first boyfriend, but the way I've always approached dating, I won't be with you unless I can see a future with you. I suppose I entered this relationship conversely--I didn't really think, I just felt--but I remember specifically the moment I knew he was something special: we were sitting in the pub on our first date, and I was a couple beers in, and so was he. I'd asked him randomly what the happiest moment in his life was, and he was describing this moment of existential bliss to me he experienced in India. My heart just melted., and I was hooked. The way he talked and presented himself...but, before I get completely carried away, he's the one who's made many of love's first impressions on me, and, considering we're spending the rest of our lives together, I feel very lucky to know he completely has my everything.

The way I look at it, his past makes him who he is today, and that's the man I'm in love with, and continue to be in love with. I'm just so blessed to have him.

[LeilaniJoi]

Often times I get jealous of things they got to do with my boyfriend that I haven't had the opportunity yet.

****

This bothers me at times more than it should. We work so much and don't have a lot of extra money so don't get out really. His " friend", the one with hero worship is the one that brings those things up the most...ugh

[lademoiselle]

He has it easy: he's my first boyfriend so I don't have any exes for him to get jealous about, haha! I know about his exes. He's still pretty good friends with the first girl he went out with and it's something which used to make me feel rather insecure when I first found out about it - more than anything because they went through some kind of serious stuff together. I don't have Facebook for various reasons, but I know that he still has some photos on his profile of the two of them during their dating days. None of it really bothers me by this point, I mean, if he didn't want to be with me he wouldn't be. I guess that's the rational side of me speaking though, because if I were to dwell on his past (particularly the sexual side of it) I know the green-eyed monster would rear its head at least a little bit

[Nurse]

We have talked about exes - neither of us had many but I never heard him say the name and I believe I always address mine as ;jackass;
Truth be told I dont want to know her name or what she looks like because I just might curb her LOL
I dont enjoy talking about those things
One time I asked him if he loved her - he said yes he did ( DID past tense) It still stabs at my heart though

I dont care much for facebook - in fact I hate it lol the only reason Im on there is to market my business ( the punctuations on my laptop keyboard are broken for some reason
I have tried to be active on fb even before I met my SO but I could not last for more than a couple of days- I always deactivate
It does hurt when I look at my SOs page and he cant write {in a relationship} with me for reasons we completely understand (legal issues and no its not because I am a minor nor is he hahahahah) it still sucks
THinking about facebook really pisses me off ololol

[lala]

my SO was in two relationships and he got hurt bad by the girls. I didn't exactely asked him what happened..maybe I should.
I found out who one of them was,because I saw some wedding pictures of his brother and there he was together with her.. he told once that he never felt so much for someone than for me and he also stopped having contact to the girls from his past because he cares about me.
Though I think I should ask him why they broke up, it would maybe help our relationship..who knows.

ps. I have no exces so he doesn't have to worry about anything lol