So my boyfriend and I met on an online dating site. I wasn't really interested in dating at first, I just wanted people to talk to online because I don't really have any friends locally and my job and schooling have me glued to a computer. We didn't talk on the site long before adding each other to Skype. When I attempted to talk to him he didn't really talk much. It'd take him usually over an hour to respond (kind of hard to have conversations that way) or he'd just disappear so I assumed he was too busy or wasn't interested in talking to me. So as time went on I stopped messaging him. Months passed and he randomly decided to message me. Coincidentally I was going through a hard time so he invited me to do a voice chat to talk about it. We clicked instantly and ended up talking for hours. While we spoke he admitted that he is horrible at IM conversations since he's horrible at multitasking and he's always working on something at the computer, and it is a pet peeve of his for others to be impatient and demand immediate responses from him. So we fell into this routine of doing voice chats on Skype every day since it was much easier to talk that way. Eventually we started dating and the chats continued. We've never really gone a day without talking even just a little bit on Skype until recently.
As of late Skype has not been working well on his computer. It makes his computer crash and he's pretty much fed up with it.
So lately all of our communication has been via Facebook messages and it is such a contrast to what we once had, it's kind of frustrating. He never signs into the messenger so I never know when he's there. When I message him it's a shot in the dark. And as expected he on average takes over an hour to respond to anything I say. So I tried finding fixes for his Skype issues, but he said nothing worked. I told him to try running the diagnostics tool on his computer and to post it to the forums so they can check it out for him. He didn't act very receptive of this suggestion, so I began to explore our back up options for calls - Google Hang Outs, Trillion, Ventrilo, etc. But he doesn't seem too enthusiastic about using them. I don't think he quite see's what the voice chats mean to me and I don't think he remembers why we started doing voice chats in the first place (because we connected better that way and it was easier).
Amongst the many other things going on in my life paired with unmedicated anxiety disorder, a few other conditions, and stress... I got a little emotional and started to take it a little personal and we ended up having an argument over it. He thought I was accusing him of avoiding me which I wasn't. I just didn't understand why he wasn't being very receptive to my suggestions and ideas. And we've already had a bit of an misunderstanding as he took me asking if he was busy as being impatient and demanding of his attention while he was working on something. I wasn't, I was honestly just asking if he was busy. And so he's been losing his patience with me as of late and I feel like I'm walking on thin ice.
People have told me I'm being clingy, unreasonable, and ungrateful. If we have absolutely no other option then it's fine, but I just feel like if it could be helped, why not?
Am I being too unreasonable and asking too much by wanting to find us an alternative means of doing voice chats?
As of late Skype has not been working well on his computer. It makes his computer crash and he's pretty much fed up with it.
So lately all of our communication has been via Facebook messages and it is such a contrast to what we once had, it's kind of frustrating. He never signs into the messenger so I never know when he's there. When I message him it's a shot in the dark. And as expected he on average takes over an hour to respond to anything I say. So I tried finding fixes for his Skype issues, but he said nothing worked. I told him to try running the diagnostics tool on his computer and to post it to the forums so they can check it out for him. He didn't act very receptive of this suggestion, so I began to explore our back up options for calls - Google Hang Outs, Trillion, Ventrilo, etc. But he doesn't seem too enthusiastic about using them. I don't think he quite see's what the voice chats mean to me and I don't think he remembers why we started doing voice chats in the first place (because we connected better that way and it was easier).
Amongst the many other things going on in my life paired with unmedicated anxiety disorder, a few other conditions, and stress... I got a little emotional and started to take it a little personal and we ended up having an argument over it. He thought I was accusing him of avoiding me which I wasn't. I just didn't understand why he wasn't being very receptive to my suggestions and ideas. And we've already had a bit of an misunderstanding as he took me asking if he was busy as being impatient and demanding of his attention while he was working on something. I wasn't, I was honestly just asking if he was busy. And so he's been losing his patience with me as of late and I feel like I'm walking on thin ice.
People have told me I'm being clingy, unreasonable, and ungrateful. If we have absolutely no other option then it's fine, but I just feel like if it could be helped, why not?
Am I being too unreasonable and asking too much by wanting to find us an alternative means of doing voice chats?
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