Helpful Advice?

[creekbankchillin]

Well my fiance and i have been together for about a year and two months. Shes the most amazing thing thats ever happend to me. I dont think she will ever realize how much i truly love her. About 2 minths ago she moved to virginia. She lived here in florida. I still live here. And its just been really really tough trying to keep it together. I miss her soooo much. Id do anything just to feel the touch of her skin. She moved because her grandma is on the edge about to pass. And her and her mom went for there goodbyes. I get it. I prolly would too. Shes moving back in june after her senior year. I just flew her down wednesday and just dropped her off at the air port today. Im been crying like all get out. Im trying to keep it together. I dont know what advice to ask for but i wouldnt mind seeing something from someone thats going threw something simalar.

[Britt6]

appreciated but as I said all has been sorted We've spend the last 2 days lost in Call of Duty or cuddled up watching either Dr.Who or supernatural lmao

[digitalfever]

You need to build a life and that will include going out alone and meeting friends. There is a ton to do in London and a lot of it is free. You can take classes, you can join the gym or just start sightseeing alone. Join Meetup and make some friends. I'm sorry but the problem is that you don't want to go out alone and your spending all your time with your SO.

Learn to live with each other while also building lives that include one another.

[Britt6]

Whos butthurt? Its my post and im not bothered lol. Im trying to be polite but to be perfectly honest negative with people can feel free to take their negative feedback and shove it where the sun dont shine I got a couple ideas worked out what was on my mind problems solved. As I said 3 times those that dont know the full story so all they see is 1/4 of the story. The way I see it I took a negative situation and turned it to a happy outcome for not only just for myself but also my son, He cares for my SO and wants him to down there us as much as I do. Im not here on a vacation I simply took my alone time and did something that will make both of our futures full and happy,as a family.

[lucybelle]

What I find hilarious is those posters claiming the forum "just isn't the same" and "everyone has gotten so mean" have been members for just a few months or less. Let me tell you, the forum has not changed at all. There's always members who tell it like it is, and those who get butt hurt from that and then drone on about all the "drama".

[butterfly712]

Here is my helpful advice, whether you like it or not...go home, you have a child there waiting while you are pursuing selfish dreams that aren't even making you happy. I don't feel bad for you, I feel bad for your son, you chose some guy over him, and left him behind. Go home where you belong, you decided to have a child, you don't get to do whatever you want anymore. I'm not at all concerned if this offends you, either.

I agree,your son comes first,always,he needs you more then your so.

[Britt6]

Well not quite living with just a 6 month stay. My return home then we start filing papers to get his visa to come to the states. Ive found a few things I love here,the parks are amazing, mostly nature trails and such to walk..I love walking around here. Its really small town tho everything closes between 5-8 pm lol.no gyms or stuff but is in walking distance.He lives in the Valleys to everything pretty much an uphill walk and a hella workout lol

[differentcountries]

ah, to have adjustment issues is very normal! Especially for a first time meet...When you meet several times, you have the time to notice little habits about the other person and adjust accordingly, then it may become easier to live together because you don't have to discover it all at once. Also, you went from never having been there before to suddently living there, so you are not just getting used to the man and his habits, but the new surroundings, too. For me, it took over half a year of dating, visiting every 1-2 months, to feel comfortable moving in with SO part time. And it is only after staying in his place for a season (+the visits I did prior to that) that I really feel like I have started to know the place and feel comfortable living there so much as I do. Granted, I have the language to deal with, but even so, I can't imagine what I feels like to cram visit and moving all into one. No wonder you feel a little confused. May I ask what you do there? Do you live on savings, or do you have job/studies that you do? I ask because for me it has been very important that I bring my studies on visits, that way I have something that is only mine and is as important to me as his work is to him. We scedule my studies around his work, but even so, it puts restrictions as to the number of errends he can ask me to do, and so on, I am not just his tag along. I don't think I would be as comfortable if I didn't have my own thing. I enjoy getting to know his friends of all ages (mostly people older than us, but I don't mind, I have older friends in Norway too). My wish is that I would somehow get friends there independent of him, although that is a bit hard to do as all my social life is through him. I also bring my hobbies, I like to watch stand-up and movies, and I do yoga. I am thinking about joining a gym there, though, do you work out when you are there?

[Britt6]

To be clear I think my mind is just all over the place, since getting here its been abit confusing and difficult to adjust the point from begining to end and I realize I word stuff wrong alot due to so many scattered thoughts. The ONLY thing I was wanting advice on is how to settle in to a new place with a person without stepping on each others toes.. Alot of times I feel as tho I may get in the way.. I wanted to know if that was normal or just in my head. To answer previous questions the 2 of us have played online games for awhile together thats how we met. we started off good friends..and had an instant connection but stayed friends for a bit due to me just ending a relationship.. After awhile we started skyping and talking more outside of our games and eventully it lead to both of us admitting feelings, been together since after 8months of dating from over seas I came here. Yes was the first time we've met and other than my confused feeling useless in a different country issue we are pretty great together, Ive seen people get married within 6months of meeting and yes we are engaged dont mean we are getting married this week, its just a promise.

[ronjaandbirk]

even still theres a fine line between a person's thoughts and flat out attacking.. which is what happened

I thought that exact thing...Sure people will have their opinions but maybe giving at least the benefit of doubt and ask about further circumstances would be in order :/

anyway, back to topic: so if you say this is mostly about you not having anything useful to do, can't you pick up a hobby? is there anything you always wanted to learn, I dunno, knitting, painting, origami, cooking, baking, being a fitness guru, astrology.. (I'm just brainstorming :P) I mean in times of internet there is lots of options to learn things that dont't have to cost anything through youtube tutorials and forum and the likes, so maybe you can get into something you always wanted to do but never had the time for?

I got to say tho that I too find it a bit worrying that if you are quite early on in the relationship and meet for the first time you already have this kinds of issue. They really might be small and maybe I'm completely wrong and it's just the culture shcok/lifestlye change whatever for both of you, but this sounds a little like routine settling in way too fast, and this is bad. Too much routine puts a strain on every relationship imo, and should be kept a way at all costs. It is normal to happen eventually but so early... :/
I wish you all the best and that it all works out well for you.

[differentcountries]

I realized that after posting, even still theres a fine line between a person's thoughts and flat out attacking.. which is what happened

There are nicer ways to ask you questions, absolutely.

[lyonsgirl]

Ok, since you want us to focus on your relationship... I don't know if I understood your last post correctly, but... is this the first time you met him? And you're already using the word "fiancé"?

If that's the case, I think you might be going a little too fast.

I'm curious about this. Is this your first time meeting this guy in person? How did you initially meet each other?

I'm still interested in the answers to these questions.

[Britt6]

The problem with bringing in sorts of details is that people tend to think they matter. Remember that people don't know your story.

It seems now like you were venting more than asking for advice, you might have been clearer on that.

I realized that after posting, even still theres a fine line between a person's thoughts and flat out attacking.. which is what happened

[differentcountries]

It was brought up only because i know my missing him is an issue that makes me moody here..it wasnt an invite to be attacked. so neither of u get it. the point was i was stating some things i know cause my mood to be off

The problem with bringing in sorts of details is that people tend to think they matter. Remember that people don't know your story.

It seems now like you were venting more than asking for advice, you might have been clearer on that.

[rubydissolution]

I was simply making it clear that if you put that sort of information out there, people are going to respond to it in kind. I haven't responded to your original post, I have no opinions I'm willing to share on your post. I'm not as forthcoming about my personal opinions on other peoples life choices as some members on this forum, but I'm glad there are people like that who won't hold back. Some people need that, and it often comes across as mean. That is rarely the intent.