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He thinks that I'm a psycho :'(

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    He thinks that I'm a psycho :'(

    Hey guys I need some advice, since the story is long, I'd try to resume it as much as possible.
    At first we met over the Internet an year and half ago and I pretended to be someone as I still wasn't ready to tell him the truth, but he already found out and I told him everything about me. Since October last year we stopped getting along like before, he said he wanted to make me hate him because it's not worth it waiting for him. It got me really upset, we both were . There were low chances to meet so we didn't make it.

    Ps I'm continuing since I said I pretended. Well I was expecting him to hate me and stop talking to me but he didn't, he continued to talk to me despite this. He said he does it for me. I thought he might still have feelings for me. But with time got even worse. I've portrayed myself in the wrong ways possible by being clingy,obsessive to talk to him, drama queen and I overreact at things even till now. Because he ignores me a lot, criticise me often, calls me a psycho etc... It kills me inside. I'd just message him, but later regret as he seems careless and emotionless since a long time, there are periods he would seem to care but then it gets back to the old sh*it.
    Sometimes he would turn nice like he might be hiding some of his feelings but then switches fast and gets cold towards me and even jealous at times. It gets me upset, last week I told him I love him and he was like hahaha no you don't. Anyways this month isn't going well at all. One night he kept calling me on Skype wanting to talk, acted so weird so I said something then he got mad and hung up saying that he doesn't want to talk. One night later because I felt like bothering I told him goodnight then he said that he has a girlfriend, I assume to just leave him alone. As I was like show me that you have and he refused to do so as he sent me a message in a form of showing me that his “girlfriend” actually wrote it for me to prove but I didn't really believe it as I thought that he just wrote it down by himself. The problem is that often I get overlysensitive to him ignoring me and I even start to believe I'm a psycho when he calls me that. I know we both can enjoy each other's company and if we do meet would be so fun. But I'm starting to lose hopes and give up.
    Since he was always the first one to lose hope in the past, so I'm not surprised.
    Everytime he messages me first I'd act b*tchy and I know it's wrong.
    So please guys tell me what to do to get out of this situation. I know he isn't a saint either so I will have to make this clear. This guy is as stubborn as me and we have pride. But I'd be the one to approach when something is wrong. And fix it but now it seems impossible to get along since he believes that we won't ever meet but I keep believing we would. Or I'm just not being realistic. Got to mention I have never stopped caring about him. I'm thinking to not message him the rest of this month.

    #2
    I'll be honest: this doesn't sound like a healthy relationship from either end. It sounds like you need to work on your self confidence before you can be in a relationship. I think it's probably best you part ways - no need to have manipulative people in your life.
    In all the world there is no heart for me like yours.
    In all the world there is no love for you like mine.
    -- Maya Angelou

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      #3
      Originally posted by rhabdoviridae View Post
      I'll be honest: this doesn't sound like a healthy relationship from either end. It sounds like you need to work on your self confidence before you can be in a relationship. I think it's probably best you part ways - no need to have manipulative people in your life.
      Since its difficult from distance I just want to keep in touch and just have a friendship with him.

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        #4
        Originally posted by Zap96 View Post
        Since its difficult from distance I just want to keep in touch and just have a friendship with him.
        That sounds like a bad idea. You seem to only stress each other.
        I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
        - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



        "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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          #5
          I agree with the above posters. Nothing good can come from this relationship. I wouldn't bother. Tell him goodbye and work on your own issues, so that when Mr as Right as can be comes along you will ready for a relationship.

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            #6
            Originally posted by Ahava View Post
            I agree with the above posters. Nothing good can come from this relationship. I wouldn't bother. Tell him goodbye and work on your own issues, so that when Mr as Right as can be comes along you will ready for a relationship.
            But I love him...

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              #7
              Originally posted by Zap96 View Post
              But I love him...
              Honestly, it sounds much more like an unhealthy obsession and not love.
              To those who dream, nothing is ever far away.

              ​Distance is to love as wind is to fire. It blows out the little ones and fans the big ones.

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                #8
                Originally posted by Zap96 View Post
                But I love him...
                You probably love the idea of being with someone/being in love, you might be infatuated, but this is not real love.
                Love isn't selfish, love doesn't play games, love doesn't try to hurt the other person. (I don't mean you here, but regards what I've read about your SO)
                Some times the craving to have some one can be so great that people end up settling for someone who doesn't make them happy and who isn't a good match, just because they are so afraid to be alone.
                (I speak from experience, I'm not judging you).

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                  #9
                  Double post.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Ahava View Post
                    You probably love the idea of being with someone/being in love, you might be infatuated, but this is not real love.
                    Love isn't selfish, love doesn't play games, love doesn't try to hurt the other person. (I don't mean you here, but regards what I've read about your SO)
                    Some times the craving to have some one can be so great that people end up settling for someone who doesn't make them happy and who isn't a good match, just because they are so afraid to be alone.
                    (I speak from experience, I'm not judging you).
                    Listen since the beginning we met wasn't serious, I never even expected it to come to this. At first I didn't believe it was serious. I've been with guys before but this one turned out to be so different from the rest and I fell for him for the first time. But because there wasn't good chances to meet didn't happen. So we both lost hopes. He said before I prefer to meet you over my friends. So make sure you don't fuck up this time. But it didn't happen because of not sufficient money... So it turns out I have to wait but I can't anymore. He distance himself from me and I leave him alone.
                    So because we couldn't meet all of the plans we had for each other didn't came true. That's all . I'm not forcing it. I don't care being alone to be honest. What is meant to be it will happen.
                    He said he wanted to love me but I hurt him and he doesn't want that anymore.
                    It's just... Idk

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I think that it is a bit odd that you went for a relationship where you were not honest to start with and were not the person you are.

                      Then when you came clean with him, he saw that you can 'easily' be two different people and not able to fully trust whether you are telling the truth or not in any given situation - starts off any relationship on difficult footing.

                      Whether you love him or have just projected feelings for him, he obviously does not return them anymore - the insults are not made in a joking way by the way you type them, and so they are probably meant as said; you did hurt him after all, and have blown it with him as a result.

                      I'd say cut ties with him, stop messaging him and move on learning from this.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by p_b82 View Post
                        I think that it is a bit odd that you went for a relationship where you were not honest to start with and were not the person you are.

                        Then when you came clean with him, he saw that you can 'easily' be two different people and not able to fully trust whether you are telling the truth or not in any given situation - starts off any relationship on difficult footing.

                        Whether you love him or have just projected feelings for him, he obviously does not return them anymore - the insults are not made in a joking way by the way you type them, and so they are probably meant as said; you did hurt him after all, and have blown it with him as a result.

                        I'd say cut ties with him, stop messaging him and move on learning from this.
                        True but while back he said I will continue to talk to you but no more lies as I promised him that and it's true. He said it was silly for you to pretend but I am not mad at you. I'd need some time to adapt to it as he was very sweet to me all this time. But the problem is that we were mostly arguing about bullshit and recently this month I really messaged him more often than I should. So it got him mad to this point that doesn't want to talk.
                        All I'm saying is that he portrayed that bad image of me and I'm really not that evil or bad as he thinks I am. He even said that a very luck guy would have me if I get married someday.
                        The question is not why is it but how can I prove him wrong.
                        He thinks I'm just a weirdo or something but I am not. That's the major reason he wouldn't talk.

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                          #13
                          Pretending to be someone you are not sounds a bit immature to me. Also, if you love someone, you are just going to be honest. Loving someone means accepting them the way they are.

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                            #14
                            Originally posted by Sanja View Post
                            Pretending to be someone you are not sounds a bit immature to me. Also, if you love someone, you are just going to be honest. Loving someone means accepting them the way they are.
                            I did, that was half year ago. I love him as he is. He has shown me his best side and worst side whatsoever. All I want is him to get this idea out of his head that I'm crazy...
                            Used to be a shallow but when I met him it doesn't even matter to me anymore. I fell for his personality. He has charms but his personality what captured me.

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                              #15
                              He was hurt you lied to him, he simply didn't get over it. If you start your next relationship with the truth you will most likely have a very different experience.
                              I made love to him only twice, she thought and looked at the man laying asleep beside her. And yet still it is as if we have been together forever, as if he has always known my life, my soul, my body, my light, my pain
                              - Paulo Coelho, "Eleven minutes"



                              "Bız yüzyılın aşkı vardır" - We have dated since Sept. 2013. To see our full story, click here https://members.lovingfromadistance....and-our-visits

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