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Things that make your LDR more complicated....

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    #16
    Age isn't much of a complication for us both, I'll be turning 20 and he'll be turning 23 three days after my birthday. But, I do find it difficult that we aren't really together yet and there's more complication that he's unsure if he can actually do the distance part, so we will see. Also, it doesn't help that his last LDR his ex cheated on him numerously while he was in college. That was a three year relationship, so it makes him nervous that I'm farther away than the last 4hr relationship he was in. That's what's been pretty complicated for me, since I'm trying to stay strong and hope for the best.
    BEST FRIENDS SINCE: 10/03/2012
    FIRST MEET: 02/10/2016 to 02/15/2016
    SECOND VISIT: 03/30/2016

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      #17
      The only complication there is for us is the job situation. For him to move here, he would have to find a job in the area and the same thing on my end. Neither of us can seem to find jobs in the same place
      "We are all a little weird and life's a little weird, and when we find someone whose weirdness is compatible with ours, we join up with them and fall in mutual weirdness and call it love " ~ Theodore Seuss Geisel.

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        #18
        the only real difficulty is that she is in the UK and i live in US, i wish it was that easy just to fly, drive, take a bus, or train to see her i wish she was closer to me at times but i love where she lives, i dont think we would have gotton the chance to be together if we werent that far away, and age is no biggie to us shes only 7 years older then i am

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          #19
          Im just about to start college and he is in college and now has to get a job to pay for the next flight and other things so we're gonna have limited time to skype form now on. The fact im only 15 (nearly 16) and he is 19 can sometimes cause issues with people obviously because im still a teen and he is an adult. Nothing really major tbh that i can think of off the top of my head.

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            #20
            There is a 5 year age gap. I'm still in high school and he is already working on his family farm in Fiji. Also, I still need to go through 5 more years of school (minimum) before i can possibly move to Fiji. We only talk about once a month, because life is hard there and he doesn't have the money to go into town so that we can talk. And there is the language barrier.

            So it's very hard, but its worth it. I thank God every day for him (:

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              #21
              My boyfriend and I don't have any age gaps to deal with... He's exactly a year younger than me... our families are supportive (his were from the second they found out I was Canadian, lol) and he's got a good job...
              The problem we have is with me! I have a very well-paying job that I adore, but I'm casually working there, so sometimes I've gone 3-4 weeks without work. And often I have 1-2 days a week that I'm there. It's been enough to pay my bills and things, but not enough to have money to save towards moving to Scotland yet. I've tried applying at other jobs and for permanent positions at my office, and so far, zero luck. I should be able to make enough money over the summer to move, but it's an awful feeling knowing I might have to push back moving to be with him. Bleh!


              Love will not betray you, dismay or enslave you, it will set you free

              Met: Cork, Ireland - December 31, 2009 • Started Dating: Cork, Ireland - May 22, 2010 • Became LD: July 15, 2010 • My Move From Canada to UK: October 26, 2011
              Closed the distance June 18, 2012!

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                #22
                For me it's his living situation. He is super ashamed of where he lives and as a result he doesn't want me to go visit him until he moves out. This breaks my heart because I would never judge him or where he lives, I just want to spend time with him.

                So I spend my time waiting for him to come visit me, which is hard because it makes me feel like I'm doing all the work and I get kind of resentful or worried. I just wish some living situation would change, I understand he's under monetary restraints right now but I wish he'd move here, or move into a place where I can go see him.

                This is something that will make or break our relationship.

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                  #23
                  money is one thing that gets in the way for us to start life at once. we want to have a civil wedding first and then do the church wedding a year after but then both of our families don't like the idea. they want the traditional wedding in our respective places. so we are saving a lot these days that makes it hard for us to do the quick visit that we have planned. this is just tearing me apart.

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                    #24
                    Age is not a problem for us. Money on the other hand is. I also have two kids with my ex, so getting them used to him and comfortable with him is taking some time, since he's not here all the time. I also live with my mom .....we live together and split bills....she needs a double knee replacement so I pretty much do everything around the house, and help her when needed. Space is limited so living together right away(him moving in here) is not an option. Money is probably the biggest problem right now though. I need to win the lottery..lol.
                    ♥Started talking online around: 10.31.09
                    Started getting serious on: 2.14.10
                    Met in person for the first time: 10.11.10
                    Closed the distance on 7.29.11 ♥

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                      #25
                      For us it's that we both love our home countries and don't really want to live in the others.

                      Also, while LD, his internet sucked so bad that Skype was basically me looking at a grey, pixilated screen. Boo.

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                        #26
                        He doesn't speak my language. Not well enough to study or work here anyway.
                        He's planning to do his Master's degree in my country, but he has to do a prep semester before and pass a language exam.
                        I feel so bad about this because I'm fluent in his language and I'd so love to help him, but there's only so much I can do...

                        Być tam, zawsze tam, gdzie Ty.

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                          #27
                          Hmmm I guess the problem is that I live in the USA, he lived here too but he was an immigrant, eventhough he grew up here like any other kid, and graduated from high school, along with his brother he had to go back to Mexico. To get a visa is a HUGE problem, we havent talked about it but if he requests a visa they might deny it to him. Hos brother requsted a visa three times and was denied three times. So if anything, the only way he could come to visit would be getting married to me...so I can fix his papers....im too young to get married, so for now I guess its me having to travel down to see him.

                          Thats a bad thing in the eyes of our culture...bcuz im a grl. Gurls shouldnt be going after guys. It makes us look desperate.

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                            #28
                            The fact that he is in university and has a job, and that I am out of school and work like 3 days a week right now... :/ he's always busy and I'm always missing him.
                            Also, the fact that he has history with this girl that gets to hang out with him so much more than I do.
                            Also the fact that is family thinks I'm bad for him because of the distance, among other things.

                            "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd."
                            -Miguel De Cervantes

                            Read our story HERE
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                              #29
                              Besides a 10,000 mile difference? Hmmmm....that would almost seem enough! But, it isn't. We are both quite a bit older than most of the people who have posted in this thread....he's been separated from his soon to be ex wife, but...she still can cause problems...so much so that it totally affects our relationship, and he's like a different, closed up person. Hard enough to deal with if your living with someone, even harder when the distance is so great. There's not much I can do to help, but try to be supportive, which can be the most difficult thing to do at times.....can you tell it hasn't been a fun day?

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                                #30
                                My boyfriend is a few months older than me, so age certainly isn't a problem.

                                One of our biggest hurdles is money. We're both University students with part time jobs, but that BARELY covers rent, tuition, and food as it is. It not only makes it difficult to visit each other, but also makes it difficult to do much when we are together.

                                Another thing that could easily make things more complicated (but thankfully hasn't) is the fact that women seem to flock to my boyfriend. Despite people knowing we're in a committed relationship, he's consistently receiving texts asking him to hang out or suggesting he break-up with me and give them a chance. I've had girls make moves no him right in front of me, and it never seizes to amaze me. I have complete trust in him, so it doesn't cause an issue in our relationship at all, but it would be nice to not have it happening at all.

                                Finally, my boyfriend has severe depression. It hits him really hard and unexpectedly sometimes and it definitely can complicate our relationship.

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