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    #16
    We don't really have rules, but an understanding.
    If there is any rule, it's honesty. No lies and that includes lies by omission.
    Other than that, we just understand what each other are comfortable with and what we aren't, and if it toes the line then we talk about it and respect each other's wishes....


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      #17
      Saying goodnight is a big one. Other than that it is trust, respect and communication. That if there is any sort of issue one is having with the other, it NEEDS to be brought up and now just put off until a future fight cuz then it just gets bad!
      Got together Jan 3, 2011~ Closed the Distance March 23, 2012~ Living Together Since June 19 2012~ Future TBD......

      I miss you more than I ever could have believed; and I was prepared to miss you a good deal." ~ Vita Sackville-west

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        #18
        I would say the only true spoken rule in our relationship is honesty. Even if it's not always what we want to hear, we both believe it's absolutely essential, especially being in an LDR.
        We also try to kinda let each other know what we're up to for the day, and we try to keep ourselves out of questionable/dangerous situations so as not to worry one another.
        You never forget your first love...

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          #19
          Honesty and to never go to bed angry

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            #20
            most of it is unwritten rules - lines we have crossed and learnt not to cross ever again (or learnt that the line shouldnt be crossed if the partner has)...

            1. trust. sooo much trust - basically not hiding how you feel and saying you are ok, and then during an argument saying you werent ok
            2. just one of the other sex in their house/flat, no one else there, is a no. the SO makes sure his best guyfriend is with him if he is with some girls to keep me less insecure (hehe) and i do the same (i usually have a guy best friend or a gal friend with me)
            3. saying goodnight to each other
            4. saying "i love you" at least once a day, and remembering to say "i love you too" back (yeh... we both get annoyed at that haha)
            5. understanding

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              #21
              - No one-on-one time with only one member of the opposite sex, in a secluded place (public is okay though). We trust each other, but we agreed that this makes us both comfortable.
              - Being faithful and honest, obviously.
              - There's an unspoken trend we have - to talk at least every second day.

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                #22
                I think the obvious apply- no rule breakers and to always keep the lines of communication open.

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                  #23
                  Well, I'm new to the LDR game (new as in, he hasn't shipped out yet, but will be doing so this week), but of the few ground rules we've defined, these are the ones that feel most important:
                  * We have agreed upon "don't ask, don't tell" non-monogamy while we're apart (four years and 15000 kilometres; it seemed the most realistic and emotionally intelligent plan), with respecting the "don't tell" part just as important as the "don't ask" part; we won't force unsolicited information regarding our sexual activities on our partner simply to assuage any guilt we may ourself feel, since neither of us really wants to know, and it would likely just cause unnecessary pain
                  * We have agreed we will only be romantically "involved" with each other - if one of us meets someone else, and starts to fall, they will have to choose, and total disclosure is expected at all times
                  * We have agreed we will Skype at least once a week, though we may Ghat, text and email either more or less often
                  * We have agreed each of us will travel to the other at least once a year, and have drawn up realistic financial plans for how we're going to manage that
                  * We have agreed to each tell the other immediately if we are feeling insecure, so they can reassure us before we have a chance to lose perspective

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                    #24
                    Originally posted by Alemap View Post
                    * We have agreed upon "don't ask, don't tell" non-monogamy while we're apart (four years and 15000 kilometres; it seemed the most realistic and emotionally intelligent plan),
                    Itīs nice to see someone else on here who thinks that as well. Miguel and I started out that way, and have only recently become monogamous. However, we had a "tell EVERYTHING" rule. It once caused us to have a misunderstanding, so we just decided to switch to a very loose description of monogamous instead lol. I hope your system turns out better for you too because of your rule

                    "In order to attain the impossible, one must attempt the absurd."
                    -Miguel De Cervantes

                    Read our story HERE
                    \

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                      #25
                      Thank you for your kind wishes! Yes, we have our fingers crossed.

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