Can "I Love You" Lose Its Meaning?

[Zapookie]

haha it's funny cause we have ways of saying I love You and we say it all the time.

when we're being serious - I love you / I love you so much
when we're being cute - I wuv you
when we're using our filipino accent - Hailabyu (and I reply with hailabyutu) lol
when he's feeling intensely loving he says - I fucking love you!

never gets old with us.

Hahah I love the filipino accent thing.

I think "I love you" can lose its meaning if you allow it to, like someone else said. I know that for myself personally, I wouldn't say it if I wasn't feeling it/didn't mean it. With my relationship it took me a while to finally say it. I had been saying it so frequently in my head, I just couldn't utter the words. And now that we've said it, it's a common thing. It's nice to hear, especially when you know it's genuine.

edit: oh and I also can't say abbreviated versions either, but I say it's "love you" or "I ruv rooo" when i'm being silly. abbreviations shouldn't exist for something so special. it just irks me and I really don't like it when people say it... "ily". why say it at all if you're not really feeling it? it just defeats the purpose. /end rant.

[ChibiFelicia]

I feel it can lose it's meaning. But i guess it does depend on the couple.

For my man and I we just feel it doesnt need to be said that often. He knows how i feel about him and vice versa, through our actions etc. We dont need the constant affirmation that we still love each other. The times we have said it, it feels like the first time everytime. Im not just "aww i love you too" im crying with happiness each time. It emtionally drains me when he says it. We've been together over 2 years and we've only said it 4 times. Its not like we limit how often we say it. We just only say it when our "emotional jar" is bursting. And when i say bursting i literally mean omg im about to pop.

I guess we just see it a little differently. Why does it need to be said if you are both working hard to make sure each other knows how the other is feeling? I just dont get the i need him/her to say i love you to validate. Why does it need to be if you can feel them? It bugs me when my friends ask me why dont we ever say it to each other. I dont judge their relationships or anyone elses, so why judge mine? In all honestly, i see it as an insecurity. The need for your partner to constantly tell you they love you. That and your partner needs to work harder in showing you their love without the need of saying those 3 words

[annb8888]

Hahah I love the filipino accent thing.

edit: oh and I also can't say abbreviated versions either, but I say it's "love you" or "I ruv rooo" when i'm being silly. abbreviations shouldn't exist for something so special. it just irks me and I really don't like it when people say it... "ily". why say it at all if you're not really feeling it? it just defeats the purpose. /end rant.

haha thanks! we're both Filipino, altho he was born in the States and I was born in the Philippines.

And yea, I agree on the ILY abbrev. it's irritating. He used to use that but I never reciprocate so he stopped using it tho I never told him it's irritating, I guess he just picked up the fact that it's not sincere.

[Haley53]

@chibi - I think everyone has their own way of doing things, really. I see it as an issue with insecurity if it's constantly being uttered so that it will be reciprocated. I can't remember if I mentioned in my OP (too lazy to go back a page), but I believe I mentioned that was one of the things for which I don't find the intention entirely sincere: if you're only saying it so you can hear "I love you too." For me, my actions communicate that I love him as much as my words, and his do too, especially in person, and in person, we don't say it as often. Still every day, yes, but it's easier to communicate "I love you" through touch, and more sincerely, than words, in my opinion, but we don't have that on a regular basis (2-3 times a year, if all went according to plan). And we do the little things when we're LD that show that we love each other, or are thinking of each other, but we both like to utter it as well and hear it too. I respect your opinion, though, I simply wanted to argue that not everyone who says "I love you" has an issue with communicating it through actions.

As for the abbreviation thing, I agree. I usually say "ily" if I'm being playful or silly, or "I ruv roo," but "ily" has never been my way of telling someone I love them when I'm being serious and sincere.

[rsvpnj]

I have always felt that it doesn't lose its meaning. However, my SO feels that it does after a while... same thing with I miss you. That being said we do say it quite often.

[ChibiFelicia]

@Eclaire I totally agree with you that everyone has their own way of doing things. Honestly the last half of that post was more of a rant at ppl who tell me it's weird that my man and i just dont say it that much. I understand in LD it is hard to communicate the love you feel for each other but we do what we do right? I prefer the overwhealming feeling of emotions when he says it and yeah it'd be nice if it was said more often but thats just the way we are as a couple.
I wasnt exactly saying ppl who say "i love you" have an issue with communicating with actions its more of a mix of things. For me (you did ask for ppls opinions so i aint judging what other ppl do) its more about not having to say it because he believes, trusts, has faith and he knows i love him. If everything we do, we each feel loved by the other then we dont feel the need to say it. The "i love you" is reserved for those special moments. I guess thats what i really mean. Thats why i feel it can be said too much. Not that it can lose it's meaning as such but because it's supposed to be special. I know that when he uses those 3 words his emotion metre is like sky high xD In a way i believe saying it often kinda builds up a tolerance to it, if you know what i mean. And im guessing you do since you said in ya first post that when you first hear it you get eh i think you said flutterbies or something. I understand if its said with meaning it shouldnt matter but thats what makes us individuals, what floats my boat might not float yours.

It does kinda get on my tits though when someones like "OMG they didnt reply with i love you too"....come on now seriously. Being forced to say it just aint the way to go imho.

[Haley53]

No, I agree. I feel a little bit upset if it's not reciprocated but I'm not going to force it because I know that he does love me. :P Granted it's only happened, like, once or twice and the circumstances made it more understandable than not... But even in past relationships, it's something I've said and not expected to be reciprocated. I can understand your frustration at other people though. I dislike when people decide to meddle in my relationship, mostly because the people meddling are the people who don't actually get it. My rule is sort of if you don't understand something, if you can't understand it, or if your only reason for saying something is because it's "not like MY relationship," then I don't feel you have any right to share an opinion, because then it's more interfering than helpful. :/ But I appreciate you clarifying things.

[HollzHeartsChris]

I think I love you can be overused, but only if you say it too much. When your feeling down, the best feeling in the world is hearing a loved one say "I love you" to you, in my opinion. I can stand by this and say that yesterday my SO was really cute when he said those 3 words whilst we were on webcam last night and it was funny when we both blushed brick red. Even though it was dark on both ends for us, you could still tell we were both blushing xD

[Snap]

I made a recent thread about the whole "I Love You" concept and I still haven't reach a conclusion. I believe that it can lose its meaning when actions don't reflect words. I also believe that if you allow it to become a habit, I begin to wonder if one truly is thinking about the importance of what is being said or if one is just going through to the motions because it would be weird not to say it. I think spontaneity increases its meaning, but again, I'm not sure.

I do like these lyrics from a Snow Patrol song and I think it summarizes "I love you" nicely:

"Those three words
Are said too much
They're not enough"

[efish1042]

My SO I don't think heard it very much in his family so he doesn't say it too often, but I know he loves me. Still, the fact that he doesn't say it often makes it that much more meaningful when he does say it. He is very physically affectionate, tho so it doesn't bother me when we're together.
I say it frequently and it sometimes bothers me when we're apart and he doesn't reply with "I love you too", but not too much. It's just harder for him to verbally express himself, and sadly I need him to sometimes. He usually replies with something cute or funny because he knows typically when I say that, I'm feeling a little down or lonely.
So I don't think it loses its meaning, but I think it can gain meaning if it isn't said as much. But as many other people here said, it is about the inflection behind it and I don't think a heartfelt "I love you" ever gets old.

[Daylan]

I don't think it can be overused...me and my SO say it when she goes off to do whatever or sometimes when she texts me in the morning before she goes to school. It's nice to hear (or in my case, see) it from her because it gives me a good feeling of being with her. She's been the only one I have ever told I love you and actually meant it, even though we've been together for a short time (a little over 4 months). Sometimes she'll say "I love you so so so very much baby <3 xxo" and it just puts me in the best mood. Sometimes I'll say once in a blue moon "I love you so very much Jess" because I know saying her name puts weight behind it and I know it must feel good to her because I used her name, plus when I say that I really actually mean it with all of my heart (I still mean it when I say I love you, but think of it like a nice giant red bow when I use her name, lol)

But yeah, I don't think it losses meaning unless the two people aren't in love, and if that's the case, then it never had meaning in the first place. I really do love her very much because she makes me feel very special and happy to have a wonderful girlfriend, the best even <3