InnocentButterfly ... your story makes me so sad. I wish you didn't have to go through that ... no human being should have to go through that. And I'm going to be honest with you, but I really don't think you should be in that kind of relationship. He's controlling you and manipulating you, going from what you've said. And I fully understand and accept cultural and religious differences and beliefs, but to put your entire relationship down to a dream? If he truly loved you, he'd try everything within his power to be with you. He wouldn't leave it to a dream. And you've said that he told you if you don't intend on learning his language, you can forget about him. He sounds like he's treating you as a dog, as horrible as that sounds. He's commanding you to do things, and expecting you to obey. And if you don't obey, he tells you to get lost, basically. I can see you're very open minded about religious and cultural differences, but can you say the same about him? I mean, he's saying his English is not good enough, so you have to learn his language. If it's his English that isn't good enough, why can't he try to improve it? But instead, he's saying that you have to learn his language. He sounds lazy and arrogant, and expects you to do everything for him. This will probably how the whole relationship will go.
A relationship should be based on trust, communication, and most of all, love. A relationship is a two sided thing ...both of you have to put in effort to make it work. What sort of relationship is it when one person would go to the ends of the earth for the other, while the other sits back and enjoys life? It's totally unfair, and totally not right. You deserve so much better. You should be a girlfriend, not a servant.
I know it would hurt you a lot, and I know you want this to work more than anything, but please ... take a step back, and just try to think clearly without your heart clouding your judgement. Is this what you really want? Is this your idea of love? Do you want to be so unhappy, so hurt and so depressed for the rest of your life? When you have that answer, then make your decision. I hope you'll do the best thing for yourself and let him go ... because you sound like such a sweet, loving person and I'm sure you could find someone who could give you so much better. You deserve so much more ... he should be making you happy, not pushing you down and walking all over you. And right now, you sound anything but happy.
I know it's going to hurt you so much ... but in the long term, it will hurt so much less if you let him go. You wouldn't have to go through all these arguments, hear all his horrible comments, be put down and commanded every single day. He says he'll be sad if you don't go, but you'll be sad every single day for the rest of your life if you keep holding on and expecting him to change. Because he expects you to change, to give him 110% while he sits back and watches. It's not right. I hope you'll make the right decision.
Good luck, if there's anything I could help you with, just PM me.
*hugs*
A relationship should be based on trust, communication, and most of all, love. A relationship is a two sided thing ...both of you have to put in effort to make it work. What sort of relationship is it when one person would go to the ends of the earth for the other, while the other sits back and enjoys life? It's totally unfair, and totally not right. You deserve so much better. You should be a girlfriend, not a servant.
I know it would hurt you a lot, and I know you want this to work more than anything, but please ... take a step back, and just try to think clearly without your heart clouding your judgement. Is this what you really want? Is this your idea of love? Do you want to be so unhappy, so hurt and so depressed for the rest of your life? When you have that answer, then make your decision. I hope you'll do the best thing for yourself and let him go ... because you sound like such a sweet, loving person and I'm sure you could find someone who could give you so much better. You deserve so much more ... he should be making you happy, not pushing you down and walking all over you. And right now, you sound anything but happy.
I know it's going to hurt you so much ... but in the long term, it will hurt so much less if you let him go. You wouldn't have to go through all these arguments, hear all his horrible comments, be put down and commanded every single day. He says he'll be sad if you don't go, but you'll be sad every single day for the rest of your life if you keep holding on and expecting him to change. Because he expects you to change, to give him 110% while he sits back and watches. It's not right. I hope you'll make the right decision.
Good luck, if there's anything I could help you with, just PM me.
*hugs*
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