what if "no spark" happened, what did u do? (only real experiences please)

[snow]

Well first of all I think just because you haven't met in person doesn't mean your feelings are just "internet feelings" and don't translate into real life - that's my opinion on this.

I have met my fiancé online and from day 1 we declared that this is a real relationship, not just an online thing, so when we met 10 months later it just felt natural. We both didn't have huge expectations on how things would turn out and just seeing each other after spending so much time together felt right (and MAN is this guy SEXY in real life!!!).

I agree with digitalfever that he is not really a realist, I think it's rather him being an optimist disguised as a pessimist - it seems to me he is scared! He wants to be with you and likes you over the internet, he has seen you (right?) and spent time with you and is scared that it would be different in real life, and expects the worst so when it happens he's not devastated, but he hopes it wouldn't happen and you two will be the same happy couple.

Yes, sometimes there is no spark and it could happen, it could also be that you two fall madly in love with each other upon seeing each other, but if you keep telling yourself it might and could and will happen.. you're setting yourself up for a self-fullfilling prophecy - "see, I told you we wouldn't feel the spark".

[bethyylovee]

When I met Stephen for the first time, the spark hit me as soon as I saw his face walking from the airport gate. I instantly melted and all of the nervousness and thoughts of "no spark" vanished. We hugged in the terminal for about five minutes while I was shaking and tearing up from all my happiness. I just remember the smallest details, like when I tilted my head up to kiss his neck, he pushed his neck into my lips and it was the sweetest thing. It was amazing to have him there, physically reacting to me.

If you've been talking to this boy for two years, you guys obviously have strong feelings for one another. It's okay to be nervous about meeting him, but just remember there is a GOOD chance of everything working out just fine. I don't think I've seen too many stories on here of people not clicking when they meet. You'll be fine. Have fun!

[texasgal]

His fears are really normal! <3 I haven't met my guy yet but trust me when I say he does care and love you! I get those same scared/worried feelings too. The worries of " what if its not the same in person? What if I don't end up liking him or him me? Do I jsut come back home? Do I stay? What if an amazing situation turns into a nightmare? " ect... but I KNOW those are jsut that.. worries and fears and I never will know for sure unless I go. I focus on the positive. I focus on the amazing time we have together, I focus on the warmth and love that spreads through me when we look into each others eyes on Skype, the way he makes me laugh and more. I know there are many possibilities when we meet but I can't let my fears get the best of me. If it turns out wrong and bad then it does and you have to move on.. but if it turns out amazing then everything was totally worth it! You jsut have to take that first step. Try getting him focusing on the positive and just help him feeel goo dbaout his worries and fears. Its the best thing to do <3 Good lucm and I'm so happy you guys ar emeeting soon! YAYYY!

[Katy31]

This isn't exactly the same situation but I do think it is applicable. My SO and I were together for 2 months before he went overseas and then it was quite a while before we saw each other again. I know this sounds weird, but when we met up at the airport, my only thought was that he was much taller than I remembered. I felt a little bit awkward because I felt like we were much closer emotionally than we were physically... he almost felt like a stranger who was somehow very, very emotionally close to me... it was a very strange feeling. However, I got over it within a few hours and we were back to normal. And these days I remember how tall he is when we see each other . So anyway, point is, you both need to give it a chance. Don't stress out if it is a little awkward in the beginning, its not necessarily abnormal.

[innocentbutterfly]

Thanks guys, I like all your stories and texasgal, well I kind of stopped being paranoid, its only 14 days now! I'm just feeling a bit weird, because I'll travel alone and 1st time and usually even here I don0t go out much alone. Either way I must stay strong and do this, right.

I don't know though why my SO waits to reserve a hotel on last time...we had many fights about it lately and almost broke up last week. He said I shouldn't worry, but I don't know, I live everything better ready in advance, but he said he doesn't need to pay now...you think I shouldn't worry?

I'm coming there in 3 in the morning, so I don't know...If we will search a hotel then...

[TwoThree]

Why are you waiting for him to book a hotel? Turkey isn't a no-man's land, there are tons of websites where you can book a room for yourself. You are coming in at 3 am. Have you considered the possibility that your boyfriend might not even show up? What will you do then? You say you had serious fights about you worrying about it, and that doesn't alarm you? He doesn't want to pay? Well pay for yourself! Of course you should worry! It's your own well-being and safety at stake, here.

Seriously, book a hotel room. Preferably near the airport. Spend the night there alone if need be, and then you can meet your SO the following day.