I met my soulmate online - we chatted for 2 years. When I say chatted I mean Yahoo Messenger and emails. Never even a phone call. And yet the weird thing is I was closer to this girl than anyone else in my life.
We had our arguments - we had some wonderful times. Chatting 4 hours a night. 50 emails a day.
Last contact was 4th july. Lovely email from her saying we would chat the following day. Then NOTHING. Not a peep since. Longest apart before was 4 days when we argued.
I don't know if she is alive or dead. I don't know if she just can't be bothered anymore or if something has happened. It is only now she has vanished that I realise how much she went out of her way to hide her identity. No surnames for anyone. No facebook page. I know that she is NOT from the town she said she was from. I know that her parents are NOT teachers at the school she said they were.
And yet she had incredibly detailed knowledge of the town. She was one of the smartest cleverest people I have ever spoken to.
I am in such a mess at the moment. I know I have been such a fool as there were so many warning signs. Having said that we had such a connection. I am sure she cared about me. I can't help wondering if maybe she cared but family life etc was getting in the way.
Maybe she had reasons for concealing her identity. Or am I just kidding myself?
I could cope if I found out she had problems - if she was maybe ill or disabled or something. What I can't handle is the fact she just never cared and was pretending all along.
We had so many plans. Talked about so many things. My life is empty without her. This disappearance is so out of character for her despite the lies.
It is all very well saying just forget about her but I feel the same as when a close relative has died. She knew I had a hting about losing people. She always said she would never leave me - that I was stuck with her. And in the past she ALWAYS came back.
Just not this time.
Let this be a lesson to anyone out there.
Do I keep digging trying to find out the truth? Maybe she has had a breakdown and is in an institution? Or maybe she is just a cold hearted *****.
In a right mess at the moment.
We had our arguments - we had some wonderful times. Chatting 4 hours a night. 50 emails a day.
Last contact was 4th july. Lovely email from her saying we would chat the following day. Then NOTHING. Not a peep since. Longest apart before was 4 days when we argued.
I don't know if she is alive or dead. I don't know if she just can't be bothered anymore or if something has happened. It is only now she has vanished that I realise how much she went out of her way to hide her identity. No surnames for anyone. No facebook page. I know that she is NOT from the town she said she was from. I know that her parents are NOT teachers at the school she said they were.
And yet she had incredibly detailed knowledge of the town. She was one of the smartest cleverest people I have ever spoken to.
I am in such a mess at the moment. I know I have been such a fool as there were so many warning signs. Having said that we had such a connection. I am sure she cared about me. I can't help wondering if maybe she cared but family life etc was getting in the way.
Maybe she had reasons for concealing her identity. Or am I just kidding myself?
I could cope if I found out she had problems - if she was maybe ill or disabled or something. What I can't handle is the fact she just never cared and was pretending all along.
We had so many plans. Talked about so many things. My life is empty without her. This disappearance is so out of character for her despite the lies.
It is all very well saying just forget about her but I feel the same as when a close relative has died. She knew I had a hting about losing people. She always said she would never leave me - that I was stuck with her. And in the past she ALWAYS came back.
Just not this time.
Let this be a lesson to anyone out there.
Do I keep digging trying to find out the truth? Maybe she has had a breakdown and is in an institution? Or maybe she is just a cold hearted *****.
In a right mess at the moment.
Comment