Getting married the "right" way

[lucybelle]

One of my facebook friends (in real life we are acquaintances at best) posted this article about how to get married the "right" way. I knew when I saw it I shouldn't read it because it would make me mad, but I had nothing better to do, and now I'm mad.

I respect people's choice to wait until marriage to become intimate or not to. This article pissed me off because the whole tone is like everyone whose having sex before marriage is a floozy whose marriage will ends in flames. And can we really say there is a right and wrong way to celebrate love? I don't know... I shouldn't have read that article!

[TwoThree]

I don't have time to read the article just now, because I'm leaving work, but I wanted to say this:

This is Fox News. What did you expect?

[lucybelle]

I don't have time to read the article just now, because I'm leaving work, but I wanted to say this:

This is Fox News. What did you expect?

I know! DANGER DANGER!!!

[SquishyLove]

Agreed, it was a stupid article. It basically had the tone of, "We got judged for deciding not to have sex before marriage, so we'll judge anyone who decides to have sex before marriage." It was arrogant. But before I read it, I saw it was a Faux Noise opinion piece. Fox News isn't exactly a paragon of journalistic integrity anyway, so I expect their opinion pieces will be equally or more stupid than their nooz. I had to laugh and wonder if the encounter with the new bride going solo because her new husband was sleeping off a hangover from their wedding night was actually real or not. Just another annoying busybody telling everyone else how to live, sponsored by Faux Nooz. Actually, I feel like Faux Nooz is like America's version of the UK's Daily Mail (or as I call them, the Daily Fail). Sensationalist "journalism" and the like. A lot of crap and fluff "human interest" pieces and opinion things. Stuff like that.

My big argument about saving yourself for marriage has always been that it's up to the individual to make that decision. There is no right or wrong way. I personally always felt that I wouldn't have sex with someone I had no feelings for or didn't know well. I broke my own rule a couple of times in my single days, and it turned out not to be very fulfilling or rewarding for me, but I was always safe and careful. When I fell in love with my husband, I knew he was the one for me and we'd be together for all of our lives, so I felt comfortable and just fine making love with him before we got married. If others choose to wait until the wedding night, that is their own business and prerogative. I don't think either choice is a formula for disaster. I think this guy's perception of him and his wife being judged harshly for remaining abstinent until they tied the knot is most likely exaggerated. And why, for the love of pete, were they going around telling everyone about their choice anyway? Was it so they could feel superior over others who made a different choice? I also don't like this "floozy/harlot/mimbo" language the dude chooses to use. Way to be a "good Christian," ass. So you remained chaste until your wedding night. Congratulations, here's your cookie!

[CynicalQuixotic]

This article is one of the most patently offensive things I've read in my entire life. Seriously, if I weren't such a nut about the first amendment, I would want to make saying these kind of things illegal. How backwards and misogynistic can you be? Join the rest of the world and stop being a self-righteous, repressed douchebag.

Of course, you can't expect anything resembling journalistic integrity from Fox "News".

[13000km]

Has he forgotten all the lessons we learned from the bible and in church about not judging others? Just because I chose to wait until marriage doesn't mean everyone else is doing it wrong. Just because people assume my relationship isn't going to last till marriage without sex doesn't mean I should assume their marriage is going up in flames. I feel like this article was written with the intent of starting a war, and is a poor Christian example.

[Michia]

Fox news....I really don't expect anything better than this relf-righteous drivel. As a Christian, I know that this type of finger-pointing does nothing to spread the gospel and bring people to know Christ as their savior.

Has he forgotten all the lessons we learned from the bible and in church about not judging others?

I think that many Christians have the wrong interpretation of Jesus' sermons on judgment. As Christians, we can and should "judge" one another. We are to point out the sins we witness by others. The judgment Jesus spoke of was hypocritical judgment as well as judgement of the facts. Christians can and should judge others, but not if they are morally astray themselves, or without the truth/facts.

As for the guy who wrote this article, his delivery is less than welcoming to non-Christians and insulting.

[Malaga]

He's self righteous about his right to judge as if it's something anyone cares about. Does he have anything in his life that I could be jealous of? No. Is he the kind of man I'd want to be dating? Hell no! He speaks of the way he treats his wife and their relationship as if it's something every girl dreams about. Yeah -- in my nightmares only! He has nothing I'd want for myself so his opinion is laughable.
"Girls, don't be harlots or you won't get a super duper guy like me" Oh the loss is too much to bear. LOL

[TwoThree]

That was amusing.

When I read passages like these:

When people do marriage right, they don’t complain so much, and so their voices are silenced by the rabble of promiscuous charlatans, peddling their pathetic world view as “progressive.”

Our wedding was perfect. Our wedding night was nothing short of amazing

I know everybody says that their bride was the “most beautiful in the world.” They’re wrong. I win.

I can't help but feel like it's himself he's trying to convince, not the readers.

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go back to my "harlot" ways.

[Moon]

Now if you'll excuse me, I think I'll go back to my "harlot" ways.

Us "harlots" have more fun!! WooHoo for being a promiscuous charlatan, it has a nice ring to it.

[mllebamako]

Ugh. This article was so annoying. I am totally down for people to choose whatever kind of relationship/life they want to have. If they want to wait until marriage, fine by me. But it's not something important to me. This article is so judgmental and self-righteous it's disgusting.

I was especially bothered by the morning-after part. Oh look at this poor couple who's wedding wasn't special at all because they had some drinks and had sex for the millionth time. Gross. He just judged their whole lives/relationship from a 2 sentence breakfast conversation.

Most obnoxious quote:

If you’re young and wondering whether you should wait, whether you should just give in, become a live-in harlot/mimbo and do it the world’s way.

[lademoiselle]

Concerning this issue, I don't believe it's case of what is right or wrong, but what you believe would be best for you as an individual or as a couple. If you feel it would be more beneficial to wait, fine! But equally, if that isn't your conviction, fine too. The choice to wait/not wait is a very personal one, and it's up to you alone (or you and your partner) to take. This article voices just one guy's opinion. He's entitled to it, whatever - but so is everyone else to theirs

[kittyo9]

Yeah... I got as far as "Fox News Opinion."

Regardless... it was a piss poor article, full of arrogance and, literally, "holier-than-thou" behaviour. Like, my marriage is no less awesome than yours just because we "selflessly gave ourselves to one another in a way that we never had" before we signed a paper and got dressed up all fancy. Seriously, what's changed?

[Haley53]

If I hadn't actually personally been privvy to religious zealouts like this in the real world, I would think they were trolling or that this was a satire (then again, it's Fox).

I skimmed it and found it amusing more than anything. I'll admit my feathers got a little ruffled, seeing as I find it quite presumptumous that anyone assumes they're in a position to pass judgment on another human being because of x or y reasons, but I have felt that way with various reactions to political decisions throughout the years, so maybe it's me. Still, if anything, I feel sympathy for the way that article essentially makes a mockery of them and their marriage. Touting something as holier than thou is one good way to ruin the pure, raw, and humanly flawed beauty of it, in my opinion, not to mention I should think a newlywed's focus would be on building a life together, not writing an article to tell everyone how amazing their first time was.

[D.4C]

noone can say what is the right way and the wrong way for anyone...everyone is different...take into account this article was written by a very strict christian...so just consider the source...and my girlfriend and i have talked about how people like to say stuff...and we just decided that we need to do what we feel is right for us...and the hell with what anyone else thinks...you have to live your life they way you want to...and not let others influence you...