Ex's

[britt0851]

Thank you! Yes I have tried that many times. And whenever it comes to him, he always says that he would be ok with that, BUT when it really comes to me, he wants no man around me. Friend or no friend :'(

You're welcome!
Well in that case, maybe he needs a dose of his own medicine. Maybe if you got friendly with some of your ex's or guy friends, he would feel some of the same emotions you've been feeling. Maybe it's just hard for him to imagine feeling a certain way, it could be that he has to actually experience it first hand. Have you ever tried giving him ultimatums?

[Miramaid]

I never even needed to do so coz he finds a ton of reasons to get rediculosely jealous and mad (over any Facebook comment I receive from a guy, over any picture of any guy I have, over my old male friend that I have, and other things not even directly related to men) And since I moved to another State I know no one here and I can not go out with my old exes or anything like that coz they are simply not here

[britt0851]

I never even needed to do so coz he finds a ton of reasons to get rediculosely jealous and mad (over any Facebook comment I receive from a guy, over any picture of any guy I have, over my old male friend that I have, and other things not even directly related to men) And since I moved to another State I know no one here and I can not go out with my old exes or anything like that coz they are simply not here

Have you made any friends in your new state? Maybe some of your gfs could help you out with finding male friends to hang out with.
As far as him being that controlling and jealous, I think that's totally unhealthy in any relationship. I believe that a person can have as many friends of the opposite sex as they'd like, as long as they remain friends and nothing else. Like I said earlier, maybe he just needs a cold hard dose of his own medicine. If you see a girl leave him comments on his FB, then make a big deal out of it, the same way he does you. However he reacts, whether it's getting mad and not talking for a little bit or having an argument, do the same to him as he does to you and see how he reacts.

[Miramaid]

:'( i just HATE to have to do that. I hate games

[britt0851]

:'( i just HATE to have to do that. I hate games

I don't think anybody likes them, but maybe he needs a reality check to put him in order

[Dauntedpoet]

In the very beginning of our relationship I was very insecure about his ex, she was soooooooooooo different than I am, she's very dependent and needy, and I'm pretty darn independent. But we talked about it, and I found out he had the same worries I do.

Oh and you do get over your first love, usually with the realization that it was a spark compared to the roaring fire of your current love.

[britt0851]

In the very beginning of our relationship I was very insecure about his ex, she was soooooooooooo different than I am, she's very dependent and needy, and I'm pretty darn independent. But we talked about it, and I found out he had the same worries I do.

Oh and you do get over your first love, usually with the realization that it was a spark compared to the roaring fire of your current love.

I can relate because I'm way different than his ex. It surprises me he was even with her, because they are polar opposites on everything that's important to him. Thanks for your input!

[mllebamako]

I never even needed to do so coz he finds a ton of reasons to get rediculosely jealous and mad (over any Facebook comment I receive from a guy, over any picture of any guy I have, over my old male friend that I have, and other things not even directly related to men) And since I moved to another State I know no one here and I can not go out with my old exes or anything like that coz they are simply not here

Tissa, this is not okay. I just posted on your other thread but then I read this too. You really need to examine your relationship. It breaks my heart to see that you are making all this effort and he is controlling, non-committal, a bad communicator and super jealous. You deserve better than this and someone treating you like this is NOT love. It is someone who loves to control and manipulate.
Sorry if that was too blunt but I have read many of your posts and they all seem like cries for help.

[Rugger]

Tissa, this is not okay. I just posted on your other thread but then I read this too. You really need to examine your relationship. It breaks my heart to see that you are making all this effort and he is controlling, non-committal, a bad communicator and super jealous. You deserve better than this and someone treating you like this is NOT love. It is someone who loves to control and manipulate.
Sorry if that was too blunt but I have read many of your posts and they all seem like cries for help.

I agree with this. Everyone can be a little jealous, it's a human emotion. But a lot of Jealousy and Controlling behavior is a big red flag.

My ex was like this. I wasn't allowed to go out wearing skirts, or anything that showed ANY skin. I wasn't allowed to go to mixers with the girls on my team, because we mixed with boys. Then He'd get mad if I hung out with guys ( Some of these guys had been my friends for 10 years and were like brothers to me). I stopped hanging out with guys because I loved him and I thought it would make him happy. It didn't. He became emotionally abusive and eventually sexually as well.

I think you need to do some serious thinking girl. I would talk to him and let him know that this sort of behavior is not acceptable in your relationship. Tell him you are giving him a chance to change, or you are gone

[SeattleLove]

I am the reason why my SO broke up with his ex (it's a super long story and too complicated to explain). I was never scared that he would go back to her or even be friends with her, because I know how much he hates her (really HATES), but she kept bugging us and trying to get him back, got agressive and violent, but I think this only made our relationship stronger, because "surviving" such a horrible attack of ex-girlfriend's jealousy is a good thing to become closer....yeah, she is the only ex he has and I really don't worry about her at all (even if she is trying to make me worry but telling me ridiuclous stories about her and my SO that could impossibly be true to make jealous)....

[OwenXAbbey]

I read all the other posts and just about everything I was going to say has been said already... but I am still puzzled as to why he won't block her, especially if her page is private. Maybe he likes the attention? I would be annoyed at my girlfriend if she wouldn't block an ex who constantly contacted her on a social network. It would make me feel like she wasn't fully ready to close off that chapter of her life.

[Caitlin2009]

Thank you! Yes I have tried that many times. And whenever it comes to him, he always says that he would be ok with that, BUT when it really comes to me, he wants no man around me. Friend or no friend :'(

your in a very controlling emotionally abusive relationship, your allowed to have friends even male friends theres nothing wrong with that so next time he says something like that tell him to either deal with it or your leaving him because you wont put up that shit!

[noodle]

I'm havin some troubles with it lol
Compared to me he has quite a few ex's (he has about 6 out of 7 livin in the same town and I have 1 out of 2 livin in the same town/country ^^). And the fact that he's still sorta kinda friends with them doesnt make it any easier. And yes I do get quite jealous especially cause his ex whom he was datin for over a year (he was with her when we started talkin first) is like one of his closest friends.
But then again there must be a reason why he broke up with them (especially the one he was datin for so long - I thought they were goin to marry lol). And there must be a reason why he chose to be with a girl he never saw and is over the ocean 4,300 miles away.
So yea I do get jealous at times but I know he wont do stuff cause I trust him

And honestly if your SO is ignorin his ex etc I doubt he'd get back to her. So personally I wouldnt worry at all

[Silviar]

I'm not worried. I'm my SO's first real girlfriend, and I'm totally fine with him finding other people attractive. He even points them out. I know who he comes home to, longs for, misses at night. It only brings us closer; it's not a wedge.

[PaperbackWriter]

Noodle, I'm in the same boat as you. I have 2 exes, and haven't spoken to either one of them since we split. SO, on the other hand, has 5 or 6 exes, lives within 10 minutes of ALL of them, and is still friends with them. In fact, he's hanging out with one of them as we...speak? Type?

Most days it doesn't bother me (I'm confident/conceited enough to know that they can't compare to me, hehe), but some days, especially when I get thinking about the move, the fact that he still hangs out, alone, with girls he dated and fooled around with, it drives me nuts. I also don't understand the "keeping an ex as a super-duper-amazingly-close-buddy" but that's a different thread!

In the end, I just have to trust that while he's way friendlier than I am, he's also not stupid, and he won't let anything happen to jeopardize us.