LDR problem

[darladee]

Update I am so sad day before I fly out my SO tells me he won't be able to take off work to spend the weekend with me. I lose my ticket and hotel money mo refund and I can't change my reservation. I just wasted a lot of money. I went spa and got a pedi and manicure too. I don't know how feel right now. Doubts concerning us as a couple run through my mind right now. We been talking for 6 months, I really need to see him. Communication is not that great any more either. 2 weeks ago he told me he will be able to be off. I ask him to call me last night but he did not. I don't know what to do or feel.

[R&R]

If you've spent all that money, why not go anyway? You have the ticket and hotel. So he has to work. Then you can tell him, "I'm here anyway. I don't mind if I only get a couple hours of your time each day." Then if he doesn't show to see you when you're right there, you'll know for sure.

[darladee]

You are right maybe I will go thank you

[darladee]

Just feel so abandon

[TaraMarie]

I agree. Go! He isn't working 24 hours a day!

[80anthea]

Reading back, this is now the second time he has cancelled on you at short notice. Are you 100% sure there isn't something else going on here?

[differentcountries]

Update I am so sad day before I fly out my SO tells me he won't be able to take off work to spend the weekend with me. I lose my ticket and hotel money mo refund and I can't change my reservation. I just wasted a lot of money. I went spa and got a pedi and manicure too. I don't know how feel right now. Doubts concerning us as a couple run through my mind right now. We been talking for 6 months, I really need to see him. Communication is not that great any more either. 2 weeks ago he told me he will be able to be off. I ask him to call me last night but he did not. I don't know what to do or feel.

Why is this "wasting your money"? Usually when I and SO see each other, one of us is working. It is not ideal, but we would rather have that then nothing at all. You can still spend his off hours together. It will probably be special just because you get to see each other

[R&R]

Why is this "wasting your money"? Usually when I and SO see each other, one of us is working. It is not ideal, but we would rather have that then nothing at all. You can still spend his off hours together. It will probably be special just because you get to see each other

I believe she meant a waste of money because if she doesn't go, she won't be refunded any of it.

[differentcountries]

Well, why should she not go?

[R&R]

Well, why should she not go?

That's what we've told her. Go anyway. It will give her answers one way or the other.

[darladee]

I suspect it is

[darladee]

Appreciate your respond. My SO ask me come visit him in January I agreed booked a ticket next day. 2 weeks ago I asked will he be able take to see me during valentine weekend he says yes. This past weekend I asked again before I booked my room. He told me he will make away to see me. I trusted that. Yesterday I booked my room sent him the details. Well last night he said he can't take off the weekend. Yes it is a waste of money. It is 83 degrees where I live. I had to buy boots and clothes to visit him in Chicago so yes waste of money. I see where are break down happen no communication. I still believe in LDR but some people come into them not being honest. I expected everybody to be like me open and honest. I will be careful the next time I give my heart to somebody. The very first time they say I love you and want marry me, I will walk away

[p_b82]

I still say go though, as other people have said he won't be working the whole time you are there, and if you can't get refunds it is a waste, if not you get to go see somewhere new, if the worst case of him not appearing at all is true.

I've been roped into work things at the last minute on weekends (and I only work week days) so sometimes things happen out side of our control, so I'd say give him the benefit of the doubt to explain it to you face to face in person before you write it all off. IMO you have nothing to lose if you do that.....

You can then let him know the communication is working for you and things need to change, if it doesn't then you know you have done all you can, and you walk away... you may regret it otherwise...

[darladee]

Update

Hi I believe you are right. He text me just now saying he will see me in the morning. I am so scared flying to Chicago but I will know the truth. My plane leaves late tonight I will think about it. Thank you so much

86566till say go though, as other people have said he won't be working the whole time you are there, and if you can't get refunds it is a waste, if not you get to go see somewhere new, if the worst case of him not appearing at all is true.

I've been roped into work things at the last minute on weekends (and I only work week days) so sometimes things happen out side of our control, so I'd say give him the benefit of the doubt to explain it to you face to face in person before you write it all off. IMO you have nothing to lose if you do that.....

You can then let him know the communication is working for you and things need to change, if it doesn't then you know you have done all you can, and you walk away... you may regret it otherwise...[/QUOTE]

[darladee]

Update I did go visit. Today is my last day I have not heard from him today. I did see him Friday. I am glad I made the trip even though it is freezing outside. I don't know how I feel right now but I am ok walking away. I want to thank everybody for encouraging me to make the trip. If this so call relationship advances he will have make changes especially in communication department.