LDR problem

[Honour]

Update I did go visit. Today is my last day I have not heard from him today. I did see him Friday. I am glad I made the trip even though it is freezing outside. I don't know how I feel right now but I am ok walking away. I want to thank everybody for encouraging me to make the trip. If this so call relationship advances he will have make changes especially in communication department.

Good luck to you, and I wish you the best of luck

[R&R]

I'm glad you went. It gave you a chance to sort through some things you were questioning. The fact that you are ok walking away if you need to is a big step from where you were. Just remember, treat yourself well and do what is best for you.

[p_b82]

I am glad that you went, and I am sorry to hear that he has not put in the effort to talk with you a little more being together and 'close' even if not able spend loads of time with you because you are working.

Sounds like you have made your mind up on things, hope it works out for you for the best. Seems your two communication differences are a bit to big to easily work through from what you have written though.

All the best though!

[Petals]

It seems you are more invested in the relationship than him...when someone wants to be with you they make every effort possible to ensure that you feel loved and appreciated. His wishy-washy attitude suggests that he is noncommittal.

Be good to yourself. Walk away with your head held high.

[darladee]

Petals you are right I was more invested then him. He just called he is off work now but has to watch his niece and nephew. He said he can come over for little. I told him never mind. I told him that I understand his job was a priority but babysitting on valentine. I told him I feel that you have a woman in your life that is priority. I am done with him. I am sad that he was not honest with me. My plane leave early in the morning can't wait to leave. I had gut feeling while back something was wrong now I know my trip was not a waste. I know once I board the plane head back to the warm desert I am done.

[p_b82]

Sorry it turned out this way for you, but glad you have been able to work it out that this is the right way to go - the not knowing and being in limbo for me is worse than then end!

[Petals]

Petals you are right I was more invested then him. He just called he is off work now but has to watch his niece and nephew. He said he can come over for little. I told him never mind. I told him that I understand his job was a priority but babysitting on valentine. I told him I feel that you have a woman in your life that is priority. I am done with him. I am sad that he was not honest with me. My plane leave early in the morning can't wait to leave. I had gut feeling while back something was wrong now I know my trip was not a waste. I know once I board the plane head back to the warm desert I am done.

This is as much closure as you are likely to get and it is good that you see the benefit of this trip. Take care of you and don't let him say anything to even sway your mind when you return. His actions have spoken loud and clear!

It's best to cut all contact and move on with your life. You deserve a man who will chase you with fervour and cherish every opportunity they get to be with you

Take care of yourself.

[darladee]

Update I flew home cried most of the way. Guess who is blowing up my phone. I resolved to myself that I would not reach out to him even though I wanted to. We talked for 3 hours on the phone discussing what happened on my trip. I told him I was hurt and his actions left a bad taste in my mouth. He apologized and want to be a part my life. He is planning to come visit me for a week. I am going to sit back and watch. I will not be a fool twice. If he wants me he has to work hard. I still love him and he says he loves me but that is not enough. I need action on his behalf to show he worthy of my love and affection. He calls and text me all day which is great improvement.

[Elizabeth123]

You already know what you want...be careful and proceed slowly. I hope that this is a positive turning point in your relationship...best wishes to you both.

[Miasmata]

Now he might finally realize what his behaviour caused him to lose. Be very cautious, if he's really just going to beg and hope your good will alone will fix everything, he's mistaken. Make sure you don't do anything you don't want!

[darladee]

Update it is hot and heavy now. My SO planning to come visit. He has convinced me that he loves me and want to make it work. Honestly when I got home I felt it was over. He has since blew up mu text and calling. We video chat too now. We talked for 3 hours when I got home from my visit. I explained that I felt rejected and hurt. He apologized to me promised it will never happen again. I pray we can work it out I still love him and now I know he truly loves me. There is not a day I don't talk to him which is a big plus. He told me on the phone I was more then what he expected. I sent him over 100 selfies. I am not sure what he expected but he said he loves everything.

[Petals]

It's a good sign that he has been more communicative. I'd caution you to observe closely his actions...do not discount that aspect of his personality that he showed you during your visit. Let him continue to prove himself...all the best.

[darladee]

Thank you my radar is up.

[darladee]

Hi everyone just want to say thank you I don't know what I would have did without this awesome community. My SO is coming to visit me which I think is a good step towards are relationship mending communication and priorities. I am excited to see him again but a lot has change for me
I still care great deal for him but the last visit still lingers. We talk a lot especially about my visit. I just want a relationship that will stand til the end of time. Have great weekend!!!

[darladee]

Hello everyone I am going to Chicago in 6 days. I am not eager as the last time. I guess due to what happened the last time. He is acting like Christmas is coming. I will be in Chicago 3 days. I will post updated once I am home. Our relationship has changed so much we are both on the same page. There is not a day that goes buy we don't talk. We sometimes fall asleep on the phone with each other. I feel good about our relationship now. S.O. has opened up and share everything with me. I no longer wonder how he feels.